Don't send your husband

notshanarishona

Fri, Dec 08 2023, 12:27 am

Their is only one way for men to learn how to grocery shop or do any other household task for that matter. Through trial and error. As long as they to to a real store where products are labeled (snd not a heimish makolet where everything is mismatched) there is no reason in the world a man is so unintelligent he can’t figure out what to buy . Are we really equating a adult man with a young child of not knowing how to look at a package to make sure they get the right thing? It s laughable but in a really sad way and I can proudly say that I don’t infantalize my husband, he knows how to do grocery shop, do laundry, even cook dinner . He is a mature capable adult.

Tzutzie

Fri, Dec 08 2023, 12:47 am

amother Maple wrote:

Send him with a tape measure
Joking btw Wink

But then there is the question of, do you measure the top part or the bottom. 🤔
Thing is, neither the top nor the bottom are exactly 9x13..... (yes dh measured 😆)
And so the argument goes....
If a 9x13 is called a 9x13, why isn't a cake bekela called a 10×14?

amother

SandyBrown

Fri, Dec 08 2023, 5:27 am

amother Cantaloupe wrote:

This is so not about infantilizing! How many people know the measurements of the pans they're using besides 9x13s? I used to write small foil pans on my shopping list assuming my husband knows what I'm talking about and he'd get loaf pans because that's the smallest size in my kitchen. Just like I'll write potatoes on the list expecting a 5lb bag and he'll come home with 3 loose potatoes. Shopping lists are typically way more vague than we give our husbands credit for

This. My husband always asks me for specifics when I give him a list. How many peppers? What colors? When I'm going I like to see what's cheaper, how they look, etc. He likes to know exactly what I'm looking for. I've learned to be more specific and just to accept that he'll buy some stuff I wouldn't buy (way more junk food!)

amother

Bluebell

Fri, Dec 08 2023, 5:40 am

Also dont find this thread funny.

My husband usually knows what to get and if he doesnt hel call me and otherwise hel get it wrong and hel know for next time.
Yes I have been annoyed but so normal for him to get it wrong.

I dont find it funny to see puzzled men in the shops.
Im happy for their wives that they are doing the shopping.

peace2

Fri, Dec 08 2023, 12:08 pm

Oy vey. I'm sorry to all the posters who got offended. I'm sure your husbands can open a thread on abbafather talking about their wives trying to buy them the right screws or something. My husband is very capable bh and I don't infantilize him at all and he sometimes needs guidance in the grocery story to find things that he never uses. That's all

NechaMom

Fri, Dec 08 2023, 12:17 pm

Tzutzie wrote:

I call the next size 10x16. Who decided a specific size is called a cake bekela? Maybe your mom baked cakes in that size Very Happy

Many of my cake recipes call for 9x13.
And I agree with op. Many men are learning disabled in the pan aisle. Among other aisles Confused

amother

Nasturtium

Fri, Dec 08 2023, 1:00 pm

amother Freesia wrote:

Chill.
I’ve had boys and bochurim and men of all ages ask me if the pans they want is the right size. And I’ve had women and teens and girls of all ages ask me for help too. And I’ve asked people for help when I’m shopping for something unfamiliar. It has nothing to do with infantilizing men. If someone asks a question, help them.
Have you ever gone to a different country where the language might be the same but the words are different? If you’re American and go to England and want to buy Shabbos napkins for your host and the sign says serviettes, I hope you ask for help. Or if you are told to watch out for the lorries while driving. Asking is a way of learning.

But noone is saying don't send your daughter to the store because she won't know which pan you want

notshanarishona

Fri, Dec 08 2023, 1:14 pm

peace2 wrote:

Maybe we just need to stop with the gender stereotypes, I happen to be the one who helps my husband find right tools for home projects or who uses the saw to cut down tree branches because my husband is nervous too.
Gender stereotypes are harmful, self fulfilling prophecies, and many times wrong.