No socks? Is it a new trend

amother

Darkblue

Thu, Dec 21 2023, 10:39 am

Perly1 wrote:

According to R' Falk ztl and many Rabbonim there's an issue with wearing maxi skirts. I can't remember exactly why but possibly chukas hagoyim or looking too casual. But I would need to ask my daughter!

Can we please come up with even more Chumros that make no sense, pushing away our struggling teens? Would you rather we all wear SHORT showy skirts, just to differ from the non jews? Please 🥺

amother

Bergamot

Thu, Dec 21 2023, 10:45 am

Wait. I'm confused over this thread. I'm ultra chassidish and have been wearing maxi skirts and socks every single day for the past ten or so years. I never thought it was a problem. My skin doesn't show. What's the problem?
(I did not read the entire thread.)

Roots

Thu, Dec 21 2023, 12:39 pm

I live in a mainstream chareidi kehilla and we all wear socks, or stocking or wtvr- covering our legs
I do sometimes wear long skirts with short socks under- but no one sees that..

btw about yemen, I have a close yemenite friend who told me they wore dresses and pants under them (like the indian womens dresses- obviously not the top lol- I mean the bottoms)

Plonis bas Plonis

Thu, Dec 21 2023, 1:46 pm

amother OP wrote:

Chumros come from having an extra sensitivity to things the fact that I go around my house with socks on is not a chumra ! Its just a
way I grew up , its a natrual, Sorry most people I know do!

Op, I’m hearing 2 different things from you.
1 that you wear socks because it’s natural for you because you grew up with it and not for any other reason.
2 is that it’s for tznuis purposes.

So which one is it?

amother

Thu, Dec 21 2023, 1:51 pm

Tried writing this dont know if it went thru if its second forgive me . I dont see whats wrong with long skirts , theyre way better than short . When long cane out it erked me like, a bit shluchy not kempt, but as time goes by our eyes get accustomed to stuff regarding wearing short socks with a long skirt if your mehalech is to go with out socks, then going with short socks isnt an issue but if it isnt then note , that when you walk your feet can be seen

Chayalle

Thu, Dec 21 2023, 2:00 pm

Roots wrote:

Yes I have seen the pants.
What I remembered specifically about what I read, though, is that they did not wear socks.

Chayalle

Thu, Dec 21 2023, 2:02 pm

amother OP wrote:

It would seem that in certain Kehillos (like Yemen) that was not considered to be a lack of tznius.

MrsDash

Thu, Dec 21 2023, 10:26 pm

amother Sand wrote:

Wow I can't believe there are people in the world who would make a rude comment about being a BT. Your mother sounds amazing!

Tao wrote:

I love your mom without even knowing her! LOL

Thanks ladies! She truly is an incredible person Smile

amother

Pewter

Thu, Dec 21 2023, 10:35 pm

SuperWify wrote:

Wow. Kol HaKavod. Hope you gain as much I did from this book. First book to ever inspire me about tznius.

Thanks to Amazon I was able to start reading it tonight and I like it already. Wink

And on another thread I read about Dina Friedman’s course on self worth and plan to listen to that, too. It was on the conspicuous consumption thread and to me these are the same thing.
Working on our Penimius.

sequoia

Thu, Dec 21 2023, 10:39 pm

Also, it’s okay to look casual!

amother

Apple

Fri, Dec 22 2023, 12:42 pm

amother Pewter wrote:

Ordered it thanks

Just ordered it too.

BrisketBoss

Sun, Dec 24 2023, 10:35 pm

amother Nemesia wrote:

I actually saw a woman in a short skirt and booties with bare legs yesterday, which is unusual in my community, but all I wanted to know was how she wasn’t freezing!

I encountered this on a day with warnings about the dangerously low temperatures. I learned from talking to people in college that some girls have sensory issues and prefer to wear just a skirt and boots no matter how cold it gets.

(On that day I wore three layers on my legs besides my dress. And I could still feel the cold. Brrr.)

amother

Sapphire

Sun, Dec 24 2023, 11:26 pm

Gottogo and phlox, that is rabbi yitzchok berkovits shlitas shiur through and through!!! Are you from the Jerusalem kollel or sanhedria murchevet? (I'm from SM)
Dad yehudis is decided by the nashim tzenuos of a dor and location. He encouraged tznius groups for women to discuss what they think should be standards.

thanks

Mon, Dec 25 2023, 12:02 am

amother OP wrote:

Chumros come from having an extra sensitivity to things the fact that I go around my house with socks on is not a chumra ! Its just a
way I grew up , its a natrual, Sorry most people I know do!

Chumras come from knowing the halacha and the source, and consciously deciding to be Machmir. They are not willy nilly sensitivities that are taken on so that a person 'feels good' and can boast that they, or their community is better and more holy.

amother

Mon, Dec 25 2023, 7:06 am

So true. It says hamachmir bmitzva tovo alav bracha. Did you ever hear that

watergirl

Mon, Dec 25 2023, 10:45 am

amother OP wrote:

Lol I ask the same thing . Guess her toes are warmed by her booties . My daughters when they come home from highschool , first thing off is their heavyduty beige seemed pantyhose , they all have sensory issues with it, and hate to wear them . I wish they were allowed something more comfterable , I admire the pantyhose the school demands but feel so bad for them . One daughter actually goes around my house with bobby socks and no tights , it drives me crazy! I never went w/o tights around , she didnt see it by me . my daughter claims theres no issur to go w/o socks at home like big deal who sees me you, my ds.??! I their mom have a natrual tznius feel of being covered at all times. We all know When hashem created the womans body he said tehei isha tzenua. Tzanua means hidden.
we have to be covered why is it ok to show bare feet . Isnt there a halacha ? Maybe its just my own upbringing and community that I grew up in, that puts me in a box. im confused!

Dear OP, please leave the site long enough to order Reclaiming Dignity. Do it now. Then come back, it should only take a few minutes

Tznius does NOT mean hidden. Far from it. I’m sorry that’s what you learned.

Reclaiming Dignity will be a massive eye-opener for you and whoever else reads it. It should be absolutely mandatory reading for every girl, and for every teacher. There are a few chapters in the first half of the book written by educators for educators. I cannot stress enough how important this book is for everybody.

Regarding your daughter, going around your house and socks, I’m not sure what the issue is with that. It seems that you were not allowed to do this at your house growing up and so you are mistakenly thinking this is a requirement it’s not. Your daughter wants to be comfortable in the four walls of her home.

I have a neighbor who raised all of her children and they are out of the house now. She loves talking to me about how she never allowed her daughters downstairs unless they were fully dressed, including long socks, or thick tights. When Their grandchildren visit, I think, maintain the same rules, and I know because I’ve seen it. Guess how often the daughters and grandchildren with daughters visit? Almost never. My neighbor also makes comments when I come with bare legs and short socks and it’s something that I don’t understand. I think it might be generational.

It’s really a distortion of the halacha.

Again. Reclaiming Dignity is a absolute must read no matter what community you’re from. I was sitting there, reading it, marking each page with tabs, and screaming out loud. My BY grad herself is reading it with a group of her friends, and saying how different their lives would be if their teachers had read this book.

BrisketBoss

Mon, Dec 25 2023, 10:52 am

I'm reading it too. So good. And I never formally took a tznius class so better yet, it's like my first. I'm reading it with a mixed background chabura--most of us did not grow up frum.

amother

Thu, Dec 28 2023, 10:05 am

Who wrote this book? Is it like daughters of dignity ?