Is this for real, or is someone playing games?

amother

Tue, Feb 27 2024, 12:16 pm

My sister is going through a divorce. I think her ex's legal team is trying to play games, because the things they're demanding seem like they're making stuff up to drag things out. They have asked for an accounting of gifts me and my other sister have given her over the last 15 years. We have never given major monetary gifts nor gifts worth more than a couple of hundred dollars. Any money transfers we've ever made to her have always been either a small gift, or paying her back for things like picking something up for us or we went out to dinner and she put it on her card and we paid her back our shares. Other side is trying to call this "income." Can they really claim that? Seems off to me, plus even if it IS income, we are definitely talking amounts way too small to be reported. What is going on here? Why would they do this?

amother

Lightblue

Tue, Feb 27 2024, 12:58 pm

Sounds ridiculous. I would ask a lawyer if it's ok to respond that you don't know because whatever was given was only to repay for something you asked her to buy for you.

Lol I can understand why she wants a divorce from this guy. I wouldn't be surprised to hear that he has a personality disorder.

amother

Bisque

Tue, Feb 27 2024, 1:06 pm

amother OP wrote:

Yes, unfortunately, these crazy interrogatory questions are a typical part of a court case.

Don’t think too much into them

It’s unlikely anyone important will ever analyze this information (unless you had a massive gift between you guys)

Her lawyer could advise on how much info to provide and which of these questions can be objected to.

We personally were asked to provide a list of expenses and contact info for every babysitter and nanny who ever cared for the children, list of clothing expenses for years, and more crazy detailed and irrelevant questions. They are legally allowed to request this information from you as part of their interrogatories, but really don’t stress over it.

amother

Tue, Feb 27 2024, 1:22 pm

Thanks. Her lawyer already advised her not to turn anything over unless/until she tells her it's been confirmed necessary. I'm not a lawyer or an accountant, though I've always been under the impression that gifts have to be large (like 10 or 15k?) To actually be reportable. What would even be the point of asking for stuff that surely any competent lawyer knows full well is silly? What's the endgame here? Throw darts and hope to hit something? Make people crazy until they give up and give the other side what they want. And yes, to the poster who asked, my ex BIL is a piece of work. We will certainly be glad to see the back of him!

ellacoe

Tue, Feb 27 2024, 1:50 pm

First of all it takes time and money for your sister to put this all together so that is goal number one if it is a contentious divorce. Secondly the higher her income the less child support and spousal support needs to be paid to her. So the purpose of the exercise is to cost her time and money, and see if there is income that they could attribute to her that would then make his payments lower. (if he is the higher earner or non-custodial parent)

amother

Tomato

Tue, Feb 27 2024, 2:01 pm

amother Bisque wrote:

I understand that it's legal to request that information but I'm surprised that it's TYPICAL. Neither side requested anything of the like in my, or any of my friend's divorces but I guess we were the outliers?

amother

Tue, Feb 27 2024, 2:56 pm

ellacoe wrote:

The trying make her waste money by needing to work with her lawyer more definitely makes sense. But what is he gaining from nitpicking on birthday presents she got from her siblings? He knows full well her income is what it is, and an extra $500 over several years is meaningless (to say nothing of money that she laid out and got paid back). I guess his lawyer is screwing him too by making things more expensive on his end for no real reason. I'd find it amusing if it wasn't also causing my sister the stress and wasted time and money.