Training Regression

EvenI

Sun, Sep 19 2010, 6:59 am

My almost three year old had no accidents at all the first day of training. Over the next couple of days he was mostly clean and dry with occasional accidents and was always saying when he needed to make. Sometimes he was saying he needed and then not actually making, but rarely having accidents. Then a new phenonemon started: for the last three days, he only makes ketanim in the toilet and makes gedolim only in his underwear. Can anyone advise what to do about this? He either seems totally not bothered by it and doesn't tell me he made (in his underwear) or he moans and groans and says he can't walk but won't say what actually happened.

Oh, and he's still sometimes going to the bathroom when he doesn't really need to make - maybe he thinks he does, or maybe he just enjoys going - I don't know which.

Any help would really be appreciated. I am very stressed out.

cinnamon

Sun, Sep 19 2010, 8:27 am

wow our kids must be potty linked Wink

I have the same exact problem with my three and a few months old dd.
She was completely clean for over a week and now (starting from a few days ago) does #2 only in her underwear.
So any advice would help not one but two stressed out moms.

RachelEve14

Sun, Sep 19 2010, 2:11 pm

Same thing here (almsot) with 2.5 year old ds. He is 100% in the toilet for one, and 0% for the other, and he had them both down for a good 2 or 3 weeks. The only difference seems to be he *does* tell me "pee pee coming" when there is already something in his pants. He does do #1 in the potty after, so he is obviously feeling that coming and not the other. He hasn't worn a diaper since the end of July and he only started this pattern about 1.5 weeks ago.

marina

Mon, Sep 20 2010, 7:54 am

very common.
http://pediatrics.about.com/od.....s.htm
http://www.thelaboroflove.com/.....ning/

In addition to the above, I would try:
using a potty instead of a toilet
having the child clean out the diaper into the potty

The most important tip: Pay attention to the signs that s/he needs to poop and put her on the potty with a special toy that she can only play with at that time. When she finally make a poop anywhere even close to the potty reward with a bigger treat than for peeing.

marina

Mon, Sep 20 2010, 7:56 am

One of the kids I worked with was actually terrified of poop itself. We had to model dollies and teddy bears pooping brown playdough for quite a while before she became comfortable with it. She would literally start screaming when she saw the playdough. It was an interesting few months.

EvenI

Tue, Sep 21 2010, 3:02 am

Since I posted, I have ascertained that he's not scared of anything involved here, not the toilet and not the waste matter. He simply likes to make in his underwear. He seems to do it only at home, morning and evening. I think he either doesn't need to make gedolim while he's in gan or if we're out or he just waits until he's home before he does it. I offered him a diaper and he wasn't interested. He specifically wants to do it in his underwear. All I can think of doing is reacting with mild disappointment and waiting it out until he changes his mind. How long might that take?

RachelEve14

Tue, Sep 21 2010, 3:17 am

Even, I tried a logical consequence. I got fed up a few days ago and put him in the shower right after he did it (he really needed to be cleaned up). Well, he hated it (I was gentle but firm, you are dirty you need to be cleaned). The next time, another shower. The next time he started in his pants, and ran to me before he was finished. I gave him a pass because it was an improvement, and since then, b'h, he has decided it's easier to go in the toilet than to get showered off afterwards.

EvenI

Tue, Sep 21 2010, 3:31 am

RachelEve14 wrote:

I don't think that would work with my son because he would just start playing with his bath toys, ask for more water etc. and it would become a major hassle just to get him out of the bath (we don't have a separate shower tray.) Sometimes he doesn't like it when I have to clean him off in the shower, but most of the time he doesn't mind at all.

RachelEve14

Tue, Sep 21 2010, 5:19 am

EvenI wrote:

RachelEve14 wrote:

No no, not a bath. I took off his clothes, stood him in the tub, and showered off his bottom. I wasn't mean about it, but it was not fun. Then I took him out of the shower, wrapped him in a towel, and told him if he doesn't want a shower afterwards, he needs to stay clean, and if we want to stay clean we do that in the toilet.

EvenI

Tue, Sep 21 2010, 5:55 am

RachelEve14 wrote:

EvenI wrote:

RachelEve14 wrote:

Yes, I understood completely what you meant but I might end up in a struggle with home over whether he's going to have a bath or not.

RachelEve14

Tue, Sep 21 2010, 8:07 am

EvenI wrote:

RachelEve14 wrote:

EvenI wrote:

RachelEve14 wrote:

Yes, I understood completely what you meant but I might end up in a struggle with home over whether he's going to have a bath or not.

Ah, that I can't help with.

Honeslty, I was all business. He was out in about 30 seconds flat. He didn't really have time to argue about anything.