being invited to a seder, small children, what would you do?

amother

Sun, Mar 18 2012, 2:46 am

What would you do if you were invited to a seder but have small children (under age 4)?
Would you go and let the child be up until whenever?
Would you stay home and take a rain check for a later year when the children are a little bit older?
What would you do?

We got invited somewhere for one of the sedarim and we are just not sure what to do. We know how our DC is the day after DC does not get enough sleep. It is beyond terrible.

What would you do?

ewa-jo

Sun, Mar 18 2012, 3:09 am

Are the people inviting you parents or grandparents?

I would go if there was a pack 'n play or a crib or a spare bed that my children could crash on.

Two years ago, we had friends with 3 small children over for seder night... their little baby slept in the pack 'n play that we kept in the living room and as the night went on, the older two (they were like 4 and 2 years old) were changed into pajamas and crashed on our couch. Also, we had lots of toys and books (because we had a toddler) so when the kids were getting restless from sitting, they could get up and find a toy to play with.... and not bother the parents.

At the moment, we have 3 kids... the oldest is 3 years, 3 months old.... and we only go out for meals to people who have kids themselves (or older people who regularly have their grandchildren over) and have stuff for the kids to play with and a place where they could nap, if need be.

amother

Sun, Mar 18 2012, 3:22 am

ewa-jo wrote:

The couple that invited us has children too. Our child is too big for a pack n play. I am not sure I want to do the couch sleeping thing, thats the whole problem.
I am not worried about my child having what to do, that would not be a problem, but it is the lack of sleep and me knowing how my DC is a day after not sleeping a lot of hours.

rainbow dash

Sun, Mar 18 2012, 5:04 am

when we eat at home or not I try to put my kids to sleep at the normal time like 7 and then wake them up 10 minutes before we start cause by the time the men come home from school and chosse the matzos etc its late. maybe wake them at 7 in the morning and keep them up all day so they will go to sleep at 7. Good luck!!!!!!!!!!

Sun, Mar 18 2012, 8:09 am

Keeping kids up past bedtime is generally a bad idea. I would not go, unless:

you bring along something you know your child will sleep in (pack-n-play, stroller, etc).
your child has been known to sleep at other people's houses and won't be too distracted
your child will be able to tolerate being transferred home and will go back to sleep

Better to host people at your house (if you want to) so your child can sleep on schedule.

baba

Sun, Mar 18 2012, 10:48 am

OUr kids stay up for most of the seider, whether we're at home or not.
They learn so much about pesach and the seider in gan, they really want to stay up and experience the whole thing.
Usually, we'll put them down for a nap during the day (or if they still nap then a second nap in the early evening) and then they can stay up till they feel it's too much.
If we're out, I'd put them down on the couch/bed somewhere and try to have a carriage along so you can take them home easily or even put them to sleep in the carriage.