Dilemma.. | Imamother

amother

Wed, Jan 28 2015, 6:40 pm

Do you do what's best for you or your employer in general? I am in a really tricky situation and I am going to make it as clear as I can.
My DH was laid off recently and I was fortunate enough to find a job almost right away. I started working and have been absolutely miserable to the point that I am angry and resentful of DH and having panic attacks thinking about going in.
My DH bh found a new job, starts Monday. I have been hunting high and low for a new job and have a second interview on Friday (going to take a sick day).
I am pretty close with my boss and I know she will be devastated when I quit, however I cannot live my life based around her feelings.
My dilemma is a few-fold.
1) my DH starts Monday. We do not have daycare arranged for my youngest because they want a lot of money. The place I am interviewing at is moving much faster than I anticipated and have a daycare on site.. I don't want to start my baby somewhere and then move her two weeks later- she is not good with change and I don't want to do that to her.
2) it will cost me more than I am making to put the baby in daycare.
3) the job is making me extremely depressed and is starting to really impinge on my shalom bayis.
4) I am still in probation period and technically do not need to give 2 weeks notice.
5) If I start my baby in daycare I will move her most probably and lose the deposit we need to give that goes towards June tuition.
6) even if I don't get this job, I am going to quit anyway because I am still in school full time anyway and the amount of money I make after daycare etc is negligible.

However, I know my boss is traveling and really needs someone while I'm gone. If I tell her today I'm giving notice and call in sick on Friday they will be even more upset (even though they don't pay vacation or sick days for at least a year). If I tell her Friday, I still have an issue starting Monday w daycare and I will have cost her two search days. What would obviously be best for me is saying goodbye as of tomorrow night but I feel terrible doing that- they have been really nice to me with a bonus at Xmas and accommodating. It really is simply the job and work that I detest not the people.

Sorry for the extra long post but I really don't know what to do.

imasinger

Wed, Jan 28 2015, 7:27 pm

I don't think I would give 2 weeks' notice if it cost me an extra $1000 out of pocket, and caused stress to a baby.

But I would apologize for not doing so, and explain why. Explain that this opportunity came up quickly, and includes onsite daycare.

Yes, it's a pain for the current employer. But not as painful as paying a lot of daycare money for a place you only would be staying at for 2 weeks, which is not only hard for your family, but not menschlich to that provider.

Given how nice they are, I think they will understand. Sometimes, people's lives change abruptly. It happens. We deal, and then move on.