Lightly glazed-new serial mishpacha

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naomi2

Mon, Apr 18 2016, 10:45 pm

I'm so disappointed with the ending! !
This was turning it to be really interesting and then the cupcake lady said she doesn't know how everything resolved and it's not her business etc. BUT IT IS OUR BUSINESS! That's what a magazine is for. To tell fiction stories so we can get the jucy details and feel like it's our business. I get the point the author was trying to make but I feel cheated out of a story.

amother

Rose

Tue, Apr 19 2016, 10:06 am

Hi! Rachael Lavon here...guilty of authoring Lightly Glazed. I just joined imamother yesterday, although I’ve been following the comments since someone forwarded me the link to this topic… and while I definitely see the resemblance between imamother and the sisterhood of Elmway- I just want you all to know I didn't base that group on this one!! It was simply a mixture of all the frum female groups that dot the internet right now...not based on any particular group.

Regarding the apparent disappointment with the ending- I’m thrilled you aren’t saying phewww at long last …the cupcake lady is gone!!! And I am flattered by the fact you wished to read more, and that my characters appealed to you. I too would have loved to be a fly on the wall during Shayna and Shlomo’s first therapy session together, but alas this was a mini serial…which in essence is just a small sliver of fiction- not a novel. You are right in the sense that there is more to Shayna and Shlomo- that it took years of work and therapy to get Shayna to where she was at the end of the story, and I'm sure there were many ups and downs. Obviously I couldn't really go into all of that in the five chapters I had to work with. What I did try to do is show the very beginning of Shayna's self awareness- which ended up being a catalyst for a real transformation- obviously one that took time, as it would in real life.
Anyway- thank you all for your nice comments- they are most appreciated and cherished and I hope you enjoyed!

Last edited by amother on Mon, May 20 2019, 2:32 pm; edited 1 time in total

pointyshoes

Tue, Apr 19 2016, 11:13 am

mommy2379 wrote:

Hi!! That was one awesome serial! You're very talented!

cnc

Tue, Apr 19 2016, 11:27 am

H!
I really enjoyed your writing...hoping to read more from you very soon!

youngishbear

Tue, Apr 19 2016, 11:41 am

Thank you for a great piece!

I'm glad you didn't condone stealing phones and licenses. I like that therapist. Wink

Keep up the great work!

P.S. does the title have something to do with the expression on the face of a phone addict?

Last edited by youngishbear on Tue, Apr 19 2016, 12:42 pm; edited 1 time in total

amother

Rose

Tue, Apr 19 2016, 12:33 pm

youngishbear wrote:

Thank you for a great piece!

I'm glad you didn't condone stealing phones and licenses. I like that therapist. Wink

Keep uo the great work!

P.S. does the title have something to do with the expression on the face of a phone addict?

Yes it did! Was wondering if anyone would catch that....

Last edited by amother on Mon, May 20 2019, 2:32 pm; edited 1 time in total

Stars

Tue, Apr 19 2016, 12:38 pm

I love your writing! Will you give us more?

amother

Rose

Tue, Apr 19 2016, 5:43 pm

Stars wrote:

I love your writing! Will you give us more?

Thanks! I hope to continue writing- it's something I really enjoy.

Last edited by amother on Mon, May 20 2019, 2:32 pm; edited 1 time in total

Laiya

Tue, Apr 19 2016, 6:38 pm

Yes! Before I started reading this past chapter, I looked at the end to make sure it wasn't going to be the final chapter. Sadly though... Sad

It really had me hooked! I liked that you tackled somewhat taboo topics, shalom bayis and mental health issues, and made therapy normal. The ending did skip ahead a few years, but I liked the closure you gave everyone. Please keep writing!

iluvy

Tue, Apr 19 2016, 7:08 pm

I love your writing! I'm writing to Mishpacha to tell them to give you a full serial next time. It was way too good to be wrapped up so quickly.

Cookie Monster

Tue, Apr 19 2016, 7:33 pm

Thanks for a great read. Keep em coming.

naomi2

Tue, Apr 19 2016, 8:06 pm

Rachael,
Just to clarify about my previous post.
I loved the writing and my mom and I were hooked! I didn't know it was a mini series so the ending was a shock for me. I can't stop myself from wondering what could have happened had you had more chapters to delve into the character's lives. Plus, It's really funny how I was certain you based it on imamother but you clarified that it was an amalgam of many different frum mom websites. How similar are we frum women!!
I'll be looking out for more of your writing....

PinkFridge

Tue, Apr 19 2016, 8:48 pm

Hi Rachael!
It was great! I am amazed at what you managed to do with your space these past ten weeks!

amother

Rose

Tue, Apr 19 2016, 9:22 pm

naomi2 wrote:

I totally understood that, and took your disappointment as a compliment! I had a feeling people would be annoyed as readers tend to settle into these serials for the long haul and really get to know the characters week after week- so having it end so abruptly was probably somewhat annoying for people. But...the upcoming serial by miriam zakon they keep advertising actually looks amazing,so we all have that to look forward to!

Last edited by amother on Mon, May 20 2019, 2:33 pm; edited 1 time in total

bigblueyes

Tue, Apr 19 2016, 9:29 pm

Racheal, I thoroughly enjoyed your story!! Your characters were interesting and the dialogue was great. Hqtzlocha and hope to see more from you!

seeker

Tue, Apr 19 2016, 10:20 pm

I loved it. I was not really disappointed in the ending, I thought it was very well done, the only disappointment was that I was enjoying the story so it was sad that it was already over so soon. It seemed like the characters and story had great potential and would have made for more good reading, unlike some serials that are hard to get into. Please do keep going.

And I CAN'T BELIEVE it wasn't based off Imamother! I haven't seen these "other women's groups dotting the internet." At first it seemed like it could have been facebook (though I don't know any groups so much like that on facebook, but it's possible) until you introduced anonymous posting which doesn't happen there. I guess I should just consider myself lucky that imamother is the only such group I'm involved in...

amother

Lemon

Wed, Apr 20 2016, 2:49 am

That was one awesome serial!! It was so with the times and I really enjoyed reading it. I was so disappointed that it was over. Would love another juicy longer serial. I feel like we're just meeting the characters and its all over Sad

pointyshoes

Wed, Apr 20 2016, 4:10 am

Btw the "shalom bayis infused eyes" was a lol!!!

amother

Lemon

Wed, Apr 20 2016, 4:40 am

Omg totally loved that part. All the shalom bayis shuir euphemisms were LOL

ttbtbm

Wed, Apr 20 2016, 8:18 am

Laiya wrote:

Yes! Before I started reading this past chapter, I looked at the end to make sure it wasn't going to be the final chapter. Sadly though... Sad

I was also so disappointed when I spotted the words "the end". It was an excellent mini serial and I would have loved for it to continue! Looking forward to reading more of your work!

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