How to control the knee jerk reaction?

amother

Orchid

Thu, May 26 2016, 9:39 pm

Scenario: 5 pm, finished serving kids supper, dh not home, trying to get all the kids out of the house for a dr appt for one of them, prepared bag with diapers, drinks, etc, toddler puts his ketchupy plate on his head proudly (face down of course!), clean him up, almost ready........5 yo sensory dd very animatedly telling me a story while bouncing around kitchen, bumped into the bag I had prepared, it fell onto floor, and my iced coffee opened up and spilled all over. I wasn't upset about the drink, but this meant a huge cleanup cuz everything in the bag got wet.

So my knee jerk reaction was to cry out "oh no, dd! Look what happened!!!" Dd immediately shrunk back and moved away deflated and I felt TERRIBLE! Beyond terrible! I feel like crying now, hours later. Of course I immediately said "that's ok sweetie. It was just a mistake. Everyone makes mistakes, it's ok" and I told her "I'm not upset at you, of course I still love you so much, etc" and I gave her a hug and kiss and she seemed happier. But I feel so bad.

How can I control that instant reaction? Practice? What works for you?