I can’t handle this anymore

amother

Tue, Jan 09 2024, 10:00 pm

I don’t know what to do
I have a 7 month old who is bh the light of my life
But I also feel like I just don’t have a life anymore
I work part time and he naps for about 20 min at a time but mainly in my arms.
Night is the real worst for me - he goes to sleep at 8 but will wake up if I try putting him down. Even if I hold him he’ll wake up after about 40 minutes ready to play but he’s still exhausted. I don’t have my nights anymore and feel like I never spend time with my husband. I don’t believe in sleep training and to be honest probably wouldn’t be able to handle it.
And yes I’ve tried putting him down on his stomach, he’ll sleep for about 10 min and then wake up screaming

amother

Navyblue

Tue, Jan 09 2024, 10:22 pm

amother OP wrote:

Why don't you believe in sleep training???? You'd actually be doing a favor for your baby.
Sleep training doesn't mean letting the baby cry themselves to sleep.
There are sleep coaches that can guide you with the process. It will do a world of good for your baby & yourself.

Elilove

Tue, Jan 09 2024, 10:27 pm

The only way you can help yourself (and your baby honestly) is by sleep training. There are different methods you can use and it may be a little hard for you for a week but you’ll both benefit so much after.

amother

Alyssum

Tue, Jan 09 2024, 10:29 pm

When a baby sleeps too little it's dangerous not to use one of the gentle sleep training methods. Sleep training just means teaching your kid to sleep on their own it doesn't have to be painful for either of you. You both can't continue like this it's just not safe.

amother

Antiquewhite

Tue, Jan 09 2024, 10:35 pm

There are a few "no-cry/gentle" methods of sleep training if cry it out scares you.

Look into the following:
Pick up put down
Fuss it out
Ferber

amother

Navyblue

Tue, Jan 09 2024, 10:36 pm

amother Antiquewhite wrote:

There are a few "no-cry/gentle" methods of sleep training if cry it out scares you.

Look into the following:
Pick up put down
Fuss it out
Ferber

Ferber does involve crying. It's an outdated method.

amother

Hosta

Tue, Jan 09 2024, 10:36 pm

amother Antiquewhite wrote:

There are a few "no-cry/gentle" methods of sleep training if cry it out scares you.

Look into the following:
Pick up put down
Fuss it out
Ferber

And there are even gentler methods for those who can't handle plain gentle methods. You need to find something that works for you.

amother

Tue, Jan 09 2024, 10:39 pm

I’ve tried pick up and put down for a few nights and it didn’t help my baby just kept screaming every time I put him down - this went on for hours.
When I say I don’t believe in sleep training I mean in cry it out - obviously I believe babies need sleep.
He does end up getting about 9 hours a night because he’ll go to sleep when I go to sleep and he sleeps in my bed.
If anyone has gentle sleep training they could recommend I’d love to hear but most of the ones I’ve seen advertised as gentle really aren’t.

amother

Cadetblue

Tue, Jan 09 2024, 10:41 pm

Not op. But im in a Similar boat. I'll take advice, and links.cant afford a sleep coach.

It's not my 1st baby, but the worst sleeper, from day one. She's 7months now. 😢

Last edited by amother on Tue, Jan 09 2024, 10:43 pm; edited 1 time in total

amother

Tue, Jan 09 2024, 10:42 pm

amother Crystal wrote:

women who don’t believe in teaching their babies how to sleep start posts titled ‘I can’t handle this anymore’

I’ve just been reading so many threads on here about how terrible and cruel it is to sleep train so I’m a bit at a loss… trying to get help and support no need to be sarcastic

amother

Apricot

Tue, Jan 09 2024, 10:44 pm

Phone is about to die so I'm just gonna throw out a bunch of questions for you to think about that may be making him unhappy.

How is he when he is awake? Does he cry a lot? How is his eating? Does he arch his back? Have eczema or any other skin issues? Is he constipated? Does he eat enough? What does he eat?

amother

Tue, Jan 09 2024, 10:48 pm

amother Apricot wrote:

He’s honestly such a happy baby. I think he eats enough (makes plenty of diapers). He’s slowly getting into solids (I do BLW). Everything is bh great but then nighttime comes and he just won’t let me put him down. In general he is very used to being held which is probably part of the problem but he’s definitely getting better at being put down and playing just not for sleeping

amother

Hosta

Tue, Jan 09 2024, 11:00 pm

amother OP wrote:

Search "Baby-led sleep consultant "

icedcoffee

Tue, Jan 09 2024, 11:12 pm

I used a "gentle" sleep coach and the results were amazing. No cry it out. Because it was so gentle and gradual, it wasn't an overnight miracle, but my baby went from waking 8+ times a night and needing to be rocked/nursed back to sleep each time, to fully sleeping through the night. It's been months of bliss and I never looked back, best thing we ever did. I don't think I have time tonight to write out exactly what we did but if anyone's interested tomorrow feel free to send me a DM and I'll send you a step by step. Also dm if anyone wants her name but sleep coaches a little pricey (my husband's work paid for it)

amother

Teal

Tue, Jan 09 2024, 11:15 pm

On Instagram

From nested to rested
The peaceful sleeper
Cozy baby sleep

You'll need to pick and choose but I've found these accounts super helpful.

amother

Crystal

Tue, Jan 09 2024, 11:54 pm

amother OP wrote:

A baby that age needs 12 or more. Plus 3 hours of naps