DD constantly licking around her mouth

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amother

Emerald

Thu, Apr 21 2016, 7:35 pm

She is constantly licking all around her mouth causing a rash on her face. She puts on Vaseline and then she's licking again when the Vaseline gets absorbed.
She looks terrible and she won't tell me why she is doing this. Whenever I tell her to stop licking she gets very upset but continues to look. I tried ignoring it for a while but she continued. She's 11 years old so she knows what she's doing.
Help! what can I do to have her stop licking?
Especially now with Pesach coming, she apply the Vaseline!!!
Any ideas? Thanks

LittleDucky

Thu, Apr 21 2016, 7:49 pm

It sounds like it might be one of those habitual things that she is unaware of and focusing on makes it worse. Many kids do that out of nervousness, anxiety or stress. Like focusing on an itch- you need to scratch it even if it will make it worse later. And you finally ignore it until someone asks you about your itchy mosquito bite...

Maybe instead of you asking her to stop, try to figure out why she is doing it. What feelings does she get while doing it, when she refrains etc. and maybe realize you might not be the right person to ask her. Especially of you have been commenting on it for a long time. It might just increase the negative feeling and make her want to do it even more to "feel better"!

does she even care how it makes her look? If she doesn't- let her bring it up to you when she is ready and willing!

reality mom

Thu, Apr 21 2016, 10:54 pm

Once the lips get dry, kids subconsiously lick their lips to provide short lived comfort, which only infuriates things.
My suggestion to you is to apply LANSINOH. Its really sticky and doesnt taste bad. It can survive many rounds of lickings, LOL. And I would try to reward her with something if she can learn to break the habit.

anonymrs

Fri, Apr 22 2016, 12:08 am

First thing, stop commenting on it.
Next, speak to pedi about it, sounds like it may be a tic. PANDAS? Lyme?
Then, whenever you see her do it, try to redirect or distract her without commenting.
Don't bring it up with her ever. You will just reinforce the behavior.

amother

Emerald

Fri, Apr 22 2016, 4:11 am

Thank you for your ideas. She told me clearly that she doesn't care how she looks. I asked her what's her plan for yt when she can't put on vaseline. Her reply: I'll just lick.

amother

Taupe

Fri, Apr 22 2016, 5:41 am

I did this when I was about seven. I hated how it looked but couldn't help myself. As someone else said the licking was in response to the dry lips. It's a vicious cycle. The WORST thing for me was when people commented and told me not to lick. It reminded me of it and my tongue automatically licked. I don't remember how I stopped or how long it lasted. I think once the weather got warmer, the area didn't stay chapped and the habit was dropped.
I didn't like how it looked but the comments did not help!

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