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Forum
-> Yom Tov / Holidays
-> Shabbos, Rosh Chodesh, Fast Days, and other Days of Note
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amother
OP
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 Wed, Jul 26 2023, 7:23 pm
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Last year I went to the fresh grave of my baby. This year I just got out of the shloshem for a parent. All the feelings of loss and sadness is extremely overwhelming. I get so triggered when people complain about the fast and the kids and how they are counting the minutes for it to be over. My sadness isn’t over. I don’t get my baby or parent back. It feels so lonely when I realize I’m the only one that truly understands shiva and pain. I feel a such a deep pain it physically hurts.
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amother
Wheat
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Wed, Jul 26 2023, 7:26 pm
| amother OP wrote: | | Last year I went to the fresh grave of my baby. This year I just got out of the shloshem for a parent. All the feelings of loss and sadness is extremely overwhelming. I get so triggered when people complain about the fast and the kids and how they are counting the minutes for it to be over. My sadness isn’t over. I don’t get my baby or parent back. It feels so lonely when I realize I’m the only one that truly understands shiva and pain. I feel a such a deep pain it physically hurts. |
I’m so sorry for all the pain you are in. This is exactly what tisha B’Av is about!! Hashem please bring mashiach and end the pain!!!!
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amother
OP
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Wed, Jul 26 2023, 7:30 pm
| amother Wheat wrote: | | I’m so sorry for all the pain you are in. This is exactly what tisha B’Av is about!! Hashem please bring mashiach and end the pain!!!! |
Tisha b’av Is about the pain of the shechina. I feel my own pain. For everyone it’s one day. For me it’s a constant. I live with this pain always.
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BH Yom Yom
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Wed, Jul 26 2023, 7:37 pm
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I’m so sorry OP. Sending hugs and support.
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amother
Amber
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Wed, Jul 26 2023, 9:01 pm
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I am so sorry, OP. I wish I could make it better somehow. Your pain is so deep and raw.
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amother
OP
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Wed, Jul 26 2023, 10:05 pm
| amother Amber wrote: | | I am so sorry, OP. I wish I could make it better somehow. Your pain is so deep and raw. |
Thank you. People know these things happened to me but there’s much more trauma beneath the surface that I can’t even write on here. Sometimes I feel like I’m in a horror movie.
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BaltoMom65
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Wed, Jul 26 2023, 10:08 pm
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I am so sorry, your pain must be unbearable. You do not deserve this. There is truly no healing from tragedies like these. Please Hashem , bring Moshiach now and end all suffering
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amother
Obsidian
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Wed, Jul 26 2023, 10:23 pm
I have ba"h not lost a child. But I do know that the Tisha B’Av after I lost my parent was horrific, and I was almost done with my year of aveilus. Everything felt so raw. It took me right back to aninus and the first days of shiva. And then I thought about that pain being what we're supposed to feel about the mikdash. And I started feeling that much for the mikdash and for my parent at the same time, and it was so much. I didn't know when the pain would end- wasn't I supposed to be feeling less this long after the my parent passed? It took me awhile afterward to really come out of it.
I am so so sorry.
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