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Forum
-> Parenting our children
amother
OP
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Sun, Feb 18 2024, 11:02 am
Didn't want to derail the other thread but it made me think. If I love the newborn through preschool age but am having a hard time loving the lower elementary stage, how do I know I'll ever like a stage again? Like if newborns are not your favorite but you know that once they start talking you do better, then you might have more kids knowing that they just need to grow up a little and having more babies makes sense.
What if thats it for me? Then wouldn't it be wrong to continue getting pregnant?
(As a tiny example one of my kids always, since she was a baby, needed lots of physical touch and cuddles. Until she turned 4 I happily gave her all the cuddles she needed. As she getting older its getting to me. I don't know why, maybe I've all of a sudden developed sensory issues (currently pregnant if that affects it)? I feel horrible that I feel this way but I really can't stand it.)
I think my question is somewhat basic although I know this post wasn't the clearest, does anyone get me?
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amother
Cerise
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Sun, Feb 18 2024, 11:05 am
amother OP wrote: | Didn't want to derail the other thread but it made me think. If I love the newborn through preschool age but am having a hard time loving the lower elementary stage, how do I know I'll ever like a stage again? Like if newborns are not your favorite but you know that once they start talking you do better, then you might have more kids knowing that they just need to grow up a little and having more babies makes sense.
What if thats it for me? Then wouldn't it be wrong to continue getting pregnant?
(As a tiny example one of my kids always, since she was a baby, needed lots of physical touch and cuddles. Until she turned 4 I happily gave her all the cuddles she needed. As she getting older its getting to me. I don't know why, maybe I've all of a sudden developed sensory issues (currently pregnant if that affects it)? I feel horrible that I feel this way but I really can't stand it.)
I think my question is somewhat basic although I know this post wasn't the clearest, does anyone get me? |
I think it definitely does! My 5 yo loves sitting on me, lying in bed with me. I really don't enjoy it.
ETA I'm also currently pregnant bh
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Rachel Shira
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Sun, Feb 18 2024, 11:18 am
I don’t have older kids yet but for me it goes in phases even within the same year. I’m sure there will be more ages and stages that you’ll enjoy.
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tichellady
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Sun, Feb 18 2024, 11:27 am
Remember that they will be adults and that is the ultimate goal and hopefully will be the longest stage
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amother
Garnet
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Sun, Feb 18 2024, 11:27 am
In life there are no guarantees. Are you guaranteed professional satisfaction when you pursue a certain career? Are you guaranteed marital bliss when you marry? Are you guaranteed that your unborn child will be born healthy? Were you guaranteed that you would love the infant and toddler stage? You do what you do and hope for the best. It's called LIFE. Don't allow irrational fears to paralyze you and run your life.
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amother
Garnet
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Sun, Feb 18 2024, 11:30 am
tichellady wrote: | Remember that they will be adults and that is the ultimate goal and hopefully will be the longest stage | As I used to say jokingly, the only reason to have kids is to have grandkids. If I could have short-circuited the parenting stage and gone straight to grandparenting, I would have. But I would have missed out on a lot of nachas along with all the aggravation.
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amother
Seashell
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Sun, Feb 18 2024, 11:46 am
Try to accept the difficulties and see the beauty in every stage. If you just view it as I love the newborn or toddler or tween age, and don’t see the nachas and joy in every stage it is going to be a very long and trying time.
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amother
Cerulean
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Sun, Feb 18 2024, 11:47 am
Soon b”H you’ll have newborn grandchildren
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salt
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Tue, Feb 20 2024, 4:43 am
tichellady wrote: | Remember that they will be adults and that is the ultimate goal and hopefully will be the longest stage |
Yes, but even then, I never stop worrying.
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amother
Opal
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Tue, Feb 20 2024, 8:11 am
OMG I am so sensory when I am pregnant!
In answer to your question - yes, iyh it will get easier. In about 6 months or so!
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mommy3b2c
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Tue, Feb 20 2024, 8:29 am
I’m so sad for a five year old baby who’s mother doesn’t like to cuddle her . I know this is harsh but that is heartbreaking.
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