How did you sleep train?

elusivity

Wed, Mar 27 2024, 5:09 am

amother Freesia wrote:

Baby whisperer is outdated.

Moms, please let newborns be newborns.

We don’t sleep train newborns.

That’s not something to be proud of.

Healthy sleep hygiene and routine is lovely but ideas like what is suggested above is wrong.

A newborn waking up like that is probably hungry and you should feed them not sleep train them.

Baby whisperer isn't about sleep training, it's about keeping babies on a routine so they're happy and you can tell why they're crying. If they're hungry, you feed them. If they're tired, you put them to sleep. Of course you don't try to put them to sleep if they're hungry (and it won't work even if you do)
The methods are ways of helping babies learn how to sleep so that you can help them stay on a regular routine, in order for them to be taking full feeds, sleeping regular cycles, and staying happy. A baby on a good routine (NOT a schedule which is time-based - a routine is an order of doing things) is happier, cries less, and when they cry you know why they're crying and can give them what they need!

If baby whisperer is outdated as you say, what's in now? Cry it out? that causes long-term emotional damage.
Feeding on demand? how can you follow a baby? He doesn't know what's going on, he's a baby! Besides for which, feeding on demand really means feeding on crying - but crying doesn't always indicate hunger. If it works for you, great. But baby whisperer is a natural, healthy way of raising babies that works great for the emotional health of both mother and baby, and there's nothing outdated about it (unless you mean because it was printed over twenty years ago... but since when does good advice have a best-by date???)

vtaherlibeinu

Wed, Mar 27 2024, 9:17 am

I'm a new mother, and I used the "12 hours by 12 weeks" method.
I hate following methods in general, just like I hate following recipes exactly.
My friend lent me the book, and I skimmed through it to understand the chachma behind the method and why it potentially could work. The main thing I learned from it was the fact that eating and sleeping are so intertwined. Once I adjusted feeding him, he fell into a pattern so naturally, without me even following all the steps and process

amother

Freesia

Wed, Mar 27 2024, 11:28 am

amother Floralwhite wrote:

I’m sorry but you’re mistaken
Even a bf baby which mine all are do NOT need to eat every 1.5 hours
That means they are snacking and not getting full feeds
If your baby is eating every 1.5 hours then when are they napping????
You are doing the exact mistake that I did with my first
Baby woke up I fed him , an hour later baby started crying -oh no why is he crying
All the mothers abs grandmothers said FEED HIM he’s prob hungry so there I went again and fed him abs then he was still crying wait is his stomach hurting is he hungry still???NOO. He’s tired!!!!!
Baby’s thrive on a routine
An hour after newborns wake up they need to be put to bed
Now when my newborn cries after an hour of being up I’m not starting to feed her
I put her to bed abs then she wakes up when she’s hungry
Mommy’s you don’t have to go through the same torture I did by thinking my baby was hungry every hour
That’s not true bf va ya can go 2 hours!!
If not then they are snacking and it’s a horrible cycle!!

You are mistaken. Yes, they should and could eat very 1.5 hours. Snacking is good and ok.

Breastmilk digests rapidly within 1.5 hours.

What you are saying is old school methodology.

You should be feeding on demand , which is the gold standard of feeding babies. Not on a predetermined schedule. As babies get older they fall into a routine naturally but you should feed baby when they want to eat.

Crying is a late sign of hunger, so if you are waiting for tears you aren’t in-tune with the appropriate timing.

Breastfeeding is for food, thirst and comfort so yes you can nurse an hour after a feed.

Snacking isn’t horrible, it’s good for them.

amother

Freesia

Wed, Mar 27 2024, 11:31 am

elusivity wrote:

You should be demand feeding. Feed baby when they want to eat. And you shouldn’t be waiting for a baby to cry for food. If you are waiting for tears you are late in the game. There are a lot of hunger cues that come before
tears and you need to be attuned to your individual baby and their needs.

Obviously CIO is abusive and research shows how harmful it is. Scheduled feedings are also not how you should be feeding baby. Demand feeding is the gold standard.

amother

Freesia

Wed, Mar 27 2024, 11:35 am

vtaherlibeinu wrote:

You are a new mother and it’s so confusing when you are starting out. That book is full of awful advice. Please for your baby’s sake don’t follow that book. You shouldn’t be waiting 4 hours for feeds, you should be demand feeding.

SweetAngel

Wed, Mar 27 2024, 11:55 am

amother Freesia wrote:

But why?? Babies sometimes want food only cuz that’s what they are used to. And no one is waiting for their baby to cry to give them food. We’re watching for hunger cues the same way you are. (Rooting, seeming uncomfortable etc) but we’re not just assuming that baby crying means feeding.
Snacking is not good for babies. They are never full that way. It’s much better for babies to get in a full feed every 3 hours than to eat a bit every 1.5

amother

Freesia

Wed, Mar 27 2024, 12:00 pm

SweetAngel wrote:

It’s actually better for baby to eat smaller meals more frequently then larger meals less frequently.

The bottom line is demand feeding is feeding a baby when and how much they want to eat so yes if a baby wants to snack an 1.5 from last feed its lovely to nurse them again.
Babies go through growth spurts where they like to cluster feed and again that’s normal and healthy.

You should be following the lead of your individual baby and feeding often especially with a breastfed baby is key and crucial to a successful and positive breastfeeding experience.

honey36

Wed, Mar 27 2024, 12:25 pm

amother Freesia wrote:

Can you explain this a bit more?

I understand breast milk digests quickly, but does that mean every single time a newborn cries it means they are hungry?

Also is there no other variables involved that would perhaps suggest a baby is NOT hungry every 1.5 hours. Maybe the mom has a really robust milk supply? Maybe the baby has a slower metabolism? Or does every mom have the same exact supply and every baby has the same exact metabolism?

In other words, how can you tell baby is crying because they are hungry or because they are tired?

amother

Red

Wed, Mar 27 2024, 12:34 pm

amother Freesia wrote:

No it’s not. And crying CAN be a late sign of hunger, OR it can be from something else. Like tiredness, dirty diaper, gassy, colic, any other pain………………… just because your baby is crying that doesn’t mean they are hungry!!!! They do not need to snack every hour if they are getting full meals. That is just incorrect.

SweetAngel

Wed, Mar 27 2024, 12:44 pm

amother Red wrote:

This. Babies cry for a myriad of reasons - they are cold, hot, tired, uncomfortable, etc. yes also they can cry when hungry.
The baby whisperer method teaches the mom to care about ALL of her babies needs as opposed to just saying crying = hungry. Eventually moms learn what their baby wants and learns to distinguish between different type of cries. However if you always assume your baby cries for food then eventually that will be why they are crying. Food becomes their comfort. They cry to eat not because they are hungry but because they want the food you accustomed them to getting each time they cry.
What I did with my baby was this. First check the clock. Has it been a while since they ate? Then yes they prob are hungry. But perhaps it’s been an hour and a half since they ate and they haven’t slept since. They aren’t hungry they are bombed!
And so on until you figure out what is bothering your baby. At this point I know all the signs of when my baby is hungry, tired, bored etc. I get it wrong sometimes but she has ways of showing me that and I’ve learnt those too. Bh I have a well taken care of happy baby and I can be a calm happy mother

amother

Freesia

Wed, Mar 27 2024, 2:33 pm

honey36 wrote:

No, of course not every time a baby cries they are hungry, but for sure if more then 2-3 hours have passed you should assume hunger. You also want to mindful of physical pain, temperature, diaper being dry and other things. Breastfeeding for comfort is lovely and healthy for baby so there is everything right with comfort feeding as well if baby is crying.
You have to use your judgment but breastfeeding often and frequent is a good thing and something you can use to help your baby.
Also an infant that is well fed and content from a feed usually will fall asleep on the breast so if they are tired that is helpful as well.

amother

Freesia

Wed, Mar 27 2024, 2:38 pm

amother Red wrote:

Yes of course there are a myriad reasons why a baby will cry and be distressed and it’s our job as the mom to try to troubleshoot. But it’s a good thing to breastfed frequently and medical advice nowadays promotes demand feeding across the board. So if your baby is hungry you should feed them even if it’s not followed your predetermined schedule that you read in a book.
Scheduled feeds is outdated. As your baby gets older they will naturally fall into a routine or rhythm but always feed when your baby wants to eat. Even if it hasn’t been 3 hours yet.

Babies can breastfeed as frequently as every hour when cluster feeding and we need to follow the babies cues. Research demand feeding.