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Forum
-> Parenting our children
-> Infants
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amother
Floralwhite
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 Tue, Mar 26 2024, 3:22 pm
| amother DarkMagenta wrote: | | Get used to this. Scheduling babies is utterly cruel since there can be absolutely no way of doing it without letting them cry it out. And scheduling babies in general is just abusive since you are not allowing your child to choose the way they want to live. How dare you!! Who cares that you and baby are happier????? |
Huh????
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amother
Floralwhite
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Tue, Mar 26 2024, 3:27 pm
| amother Ginger wrote: | | It’s not what you’re doing though that is helping her connect sleep cycles. She naturally is doing that. It’s her temperament |
No she isn’t naturally doing that
For 5.5 weeks I tried put her down drowsy she popped her eyes open right away
Now I started teaching her how she can fall back asleep on her “own”
Some days it works and others it takes time
Trust me it’s not her temperament and def wasn’t my other baby but they learn
Again without crying it out!
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amother
Ginger
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Tue, Mar 26 2024, 3:28 pm
| amother Floralwhite wrote: | No she isn’t naturally doing that
For 5.5 weeks I tried put her down drowsy she popped her eyes open right away
Now I started teaching her how she can fall back asleep on her “own”
Some days it works and others it takes time
Trust me it’s not her temperament and def wasn’t my other baby but they learn
Again without crying it out! |
It could just be that developmentally she’s ready to connect sleep cycles now. But babies don’t need to be taught - they do it on their own. Naps will eventually lengthen at around 6 months or so.
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amother
Glitter
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Tue, Mar 26 2024, 3:30 pm
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I firmly believe both parents have to be involved. Make sure baby is eating enough over 24 hours. Clean diaper. Ideal temperature in room. Baby gets plenty of physical attention during the day. Naps are age appropriate. Not close to bedtime. Not more than 5 minutes of crying.
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amother
Floralwhite
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Tue, Mar 26 2024, 3:31 pm
| amother Ginger wrote: | | It could just be that developmentally she’s ready to connect sleep cycles now. But babies don’t need to be taught - they do it on their own. Naps will eventually lengthen at around 6 months or so. |
I diss agree
My oldest was 13 weeks when I found out about taking Cara babies as I was loosing my mind
He would only nap for 30 min as he wadnf connecting sleep cycles
Did the program 2 weeks later he’s connecting it and sleeping 1.5hkurs-2 hours
He learned the skill!!!
It’s a skill that can be taught
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amother
Ginger
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Tue, Mar 26 2024, 3:32 pm
| amother Floralwhite wrote: | I diss agree
My oldest was 13 weeks when I found out about taking Cara babies as I was loosing my mind
He would only nap for 30 min as he wadnf connecting sleep cycles
Did the program 2 weeks later he’s connecting it and sleeping 1.5hkurs-2 hours
He learned the skill!!!
It’s a skill that can be taught |
I took Takingcarababjies newborn course. And it didn’t work. So I still believe every baby is different and temperament dependent.
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amother
Floralwhite
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Tue, Mar 26 2024, 3:37 pm
[quote="amother Ginger"]I took Takingcarababjies newborn course. And it didn’t work. So I still believe every baby is different and temperament dependent
Interesting your baby never learned to put here self to sleep?
Or only wasn’t able to connect cycles?
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amother
Mimosa
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Tue, Mar 26 2024, 3:56 pm
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Ladies putting babies to sleep is HARD. It’s been this way for thousands of years. Sorry to all aspiring new moms, but there’s no magic button. You try and more often fail, and sooner than later they’re 2 years old, and sleeping like little angels. Let babies be babies.
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elusivity
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Tue, Mar 26 2024, 4:13 pm
| amother OP wrote: | Thanks everyone for your perspectives.
There are some many confilicting arguments one way or the other, beyond this thread. I guess that my frustration is stemming from all of the "advice" out there and what my baby should or shouldn't be doing. I wish I didn't pay attention to all of this, and then I probably wouldn't be frustrated.
While I would love for her to sleep through the night, it's not my main issue at this point. But I'd really like her to be able to fall asleep by herself during the day and/or sleep longer than 40 minutes at a time. |
It sounds like you're missing your baby's sleep window, if she's rubbing her eyes/dropping off when you put her down she's too tired. You need to catch her by the second yawn, settle her in your arms, maybe sing a little, till she's a bit more relaxed and then lay her down to go to sleep herself. I know this sounds idealistic but it works with babies who are used to it... With babies who haven't yet learned how to fall alseep on their own, you need to work with them to help them learn it.
It makes sense that she's only sleeping 40 minutes since a human sleep cycle is 45 minutes. Babies who know how to fall asleep on their own come out of the first sleep cycle and drop back into the second one, whereas babies who don't simply wake up and can't get back to sleep.
I follow the Baby Whisperer's methods and my babies sleep through the night (7pm till 7am) from 3 weeks. Not joking!!! There's no CIO involved (I can't bear the thought of babies being left to cry, it's so awful). She has techniques for every issue you might run into with your baby, but the one that you probably would find most useful is pick up/put down.
When your baby is going to sleep and starts crying, you pick her up and hold her just until she stops crying. The moment she stops, you put her straight back down. If she starts again, put her down in the crib and pick her up again. Hold her until she stops crying again, put her down. Repeat as long as it takes. Eventually your baby will go to sleep by herself. The first time you do this it can take an hour or more, if you're using it with a baby who doesn't know how to sleep on their own - but each consecutive time you use it, it takes quicker to work.
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amother
OP
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Tue, Mar 26 2024, 5:57 pm
| elusivity wrote: | It sounds like you're missing your baby's sleep window, if she's rubbing her eyes/dropping off when you put her down she's too tired. You need to catch her by the second yawn, settle her in your arms, maybe sing a little, till she's a bit more relaxed and then lay her down to go to sleep herself. I know this sounds idealistic but it works with babies who are used to it... With babies who haven't yet learned how to fall alseep on their own, you need to work with them to help them learn it.
It makes sense that she's only sleeping 40 minutes since a human sleep cycle is 45 minutes. Babies who know how to fall asleep on their own come out of the first sleep cycle and drop back into the second one, whereas babies who don't simply wake up and can't get back to sleep.
I follow the Baby Whisperer's methods and my babies sleep through the night (7pm till 7am) from 3 weeks. Not joking!!! There's no CIO involved (I can't bear the thought of babies being left to cry, it's so awful). She has techniques for every issue you might run into with your baby, but the one that you probably would find most useful is pick up/put down.
When your baby is going to sleep and starts crying, you pick her up and hold her just until she stops crying. The moment she stops, you put her straight back down. If she starts again, put her down in the crib and pick her up again. Hold her until she stops crying again, put her down. Repeat as long as it takes. Eventually your baby will go to sleep by herself. The first time you do this it can take an hour or more, if you're using it with a baby who doesn't know how to sleep on their own - but each consecutive time you use it, it takes quicker to work. |
What would the difference be if I put her down at the first yawn? I would have to watch her like a hawk all day and I can't do that.
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SweetAngel
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Tue, Mar 26 2024, 6:51 pm
| amother OP wrote: | | What would the difference be if I put her down at the first yawn? I would have to watch her like a hawk all day and I can't do that. |
If she’s on a routine you would know when she’s going to get tired and during that window watch out for signs of tiredness. It’s not all or nothing - she can yawn and you can finish what you’re doing and then put her in. Also yawning isn’t the only sign on tiredness - she may rub her eyes or get kvetchy.
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amother
Freesia
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Tue, Mar 26 2024, 8:52 pm
| elusivity wrote: | It sounds like you're missing your baby's sleep window, if she's rubbing her eyes/dropping off when you put her down she's too tired. You need to catch her by the second yawn, settle her in your arms, maybe sing a little, till she's a bit more relaxed and then lay her down to go to sleep herself. I know this sounds idealistic but it works with babies who are used to it... With babies who haven't yet learned how to fall alseep on their own, you need to work with them to help them learn it.
It makes sense that she's only sleeping 40 minutes since a human sleep cycle is 45 minutes. Babies who know how to fall asleep on their own come out of the first sleep cycle and drop back into the second one, whereas babies who don't simply wake up and can't get back to sleep.
I follow the Baby Whisperer's methods and my babies sleep through the night (7pm till 7am) from 3 weeks. Not joking!!! There's no CIO involved (I can't bear the thought of babies being left to cry, it's so awful). She has techniques for every issue you might run into with your baby, but the one that you probably would find most useful is pick up/put down.
When your baby is going to sleep and starts crying, you pick her up and hold her just until she stops crying. The moment she stops, you put her straight back down. If she starts again, put her down in the crib and pick her up again. Hold her until she stops crying again, put her down. Repeat as long as it takes. Eventually your baby will go to sleep by herself. The first time you do this it can take an hour or more, if you're using it with a baby who doesn't know how to sleep on their own - but each consecutive time you use it, it takes quicker to work. |
Baby whisperer is outdated.
Moms, please let newborns be newborns.
We don’t sleep train newborns.
That’s not something to be proud of.
Healthy sleep hygiene and routine is lovely but ideas like what is suggested above is wrong.
A newborn waking up like that is probably hungry and you should feed them not sleep train them.
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SweetAngel
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Tue, Mar 26 2024, 8:55 pm
| amother Freesia wrote: | Baby whisperer is outdated.
Moms, please let newborns be newborns.
We don’t sleep train newborns.
That’s not something to be proud of.
Healthy sleep hygiene and routine is lovely but ideas like what is suggested above is wrong.
A newborn waking up like that is probably hungry and you should feed them not sleep train them. |
Seriously?? A newborn who is bottle fed 2-4 oz an hour and a half before is hungry????
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amother
Freesia
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Tue, Mar 26 2024, 8:57 pm
| SweetAngel wrote: | | Seriously?? A newborn who is bottle fed 2-4 oz an hour and a half before is hungry???? |
Yes. You should be demand feeding. That means to feed the baby when they are hungry, not when the clock dictates. A breastfed newborn can easily eat every 1.5 hours. That’s normal and good.
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amother
Darkblue
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Tue, Mar 26 2024, 8:59 pm
| elusivity wrote: | It sounds like you're missing your baby's sleep window, if she's rubbing her eyes/dropping off when you put her down she's too tired. You need to catch her by the second yawn, settle her in your arms, maybe sing a little, till she's a bit more relaxed and then lay her down to go to sleep herself. I know this sounds idealistic but it works with babies who are used to it... With babies who haven't yet learned how to fall alseep on their own, you need to work with them to help them learn it.
It makes sense that she's only sleeping 40 minutes since a human sleep cycle is 45 minutes. Babies who know how to fall asleep on their own come out of the first sleep cycle and drop back into the second one, whereas babies who don't simply wake up and can't get back to sleep.
I follow the Baby Whisperer's methods and my babies sleep through the night (7pm till 7am) from 3 weeks. Not joking!!! There's no CIO involved (I can't bear the thought of babies being left to cry, it's so awful). She has techniques for every issue you might run into with your baby, but the one that you probably would find most useful is pick up/put down.
When your baby is going to sleep and starts crying, you pick her up and hold her just until she stops crying. The moment she stops, you put her straight back down. If she starts again, put her down in the crib and pick her up again. Hold her until she stops crying again, put her down. Repeat as long as it takes. Eventually your baby will go to sleep by herself. The first time you do this it can take an hour or more, if you're using it with a baby who doesn't know how to sleep on their own - but each consecutive time you use it, it takes quicker to work. |
I’m always so confused by the pick up pit down method.
Is it only my baby who shrieks like crazy when I put her back down?
Like the second I lower her she’s already yelling so right when I put her down I have to pick her back up again, takes a few minutes to calm her and then I put her down only to immediately pick her up
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amother
Freesia
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Tue, Mar 26 2024, 9:01 pm
| amother Darkblue wrote: | I’m always so confused by the pick up pit down method.
Is it only my baby who shrieks like crazy when I put her back down?
Like the second I lower her she’s already yelling so right when I put her down I have to pick her back up again, takes a few minutes to calm her and then I put her down only to immediately pick her up |
Don’t follow this method. Use your common sense and motherly instincts. A screaming baby needs to be held not keep on being put down.
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SweetAngel
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Tue, Mar 26 2024, 9:02 pm
| amother Freesia wrote: | | Yes. You should be demand feeding. That means to feed the baby when they are hungry, not when the clock dictates. A breastfed newborn can easily eat every 1.5 hours. That’s normal and good. |
True. A bottle fed baby would be in pain from eating that much.
Point is that each mother should do what works for her and her baby. Making sweeping statements like baby is hungry when they wake up 45 minutes later is not taking that into account…
If you don’t find the baby whisperer method or any method helpful by all means don’t use it. But that doesn’t mean it’s not helpful to others…
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amother
Freesia
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Tue, Mar 26 2024, 9:05 pm
| SweetAngel wrote: | True. A bottle fed baby would be in pain from eating that much.
Point is that each mother should do what works for her and her baby. Making sweeping statements like baby is hungry when they wake up 45 minutes later is not taking that into account…
If you don’t find the baby whisperer method or any method helpful by all means don’t use it. But that doesn’t mean it’s not helpful to others… |
Obviously use your judgment if baby is hungry but a breastfed baby can and should eat frequently.
It’s problematic to use methods that are outdated as they are misguided and harmful.
There is a lot of new research since the baby whisperer was published years ago and there is no reason to follow outdated methods.
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SweetAngel
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Tue, Mar 26 2024, 9:13 pm
| amother Freesia wrote: | Obviously use your judgment if baby is hungry but a breastfed baby can and should eat frequently.
It’s problematic to use methods that are outdated as they are misguided and harmful.
There is a lot of new research since the baby whisperer was published years ago and there is no reason to follow outdated methods. |
How is the baby whisperer method harmful? Asking genuinely. I can’t imagine its neglectful or emotionally harmful
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amother
Floralwhite
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Wed, Mar 27 2024, 4:12 am
| amother Freesia wrote: | Baby whisperer is outdated.
Moms, please let newborns be newborns.
We don’t sleep train newborns.
That’s not something to be proud of.
Healthy sleep hygiene and routine is lovely but ideas like what is suggested above is wrong.
A newborn waking up like that is probably hungry and you should feed them not sleep train them. |
I’m sorry but you’re mistaken
Even a bf baby which mine all are do NOT need to eat every 1.5 hours
That means they are snacking and not getting full feeds
If your baby is eating every 1.5 hours then when are they napping????
You are doing the exact mistake that I did with my first
Baby woke up I fed him , an hour later baby started crying -oh no why is he crying
All the mothers abs grandmothers said FEED HIM he’s prob hungry so there I went again and fed him abs then he was still crying wait is his stomach hurting is he hungry still???NOO. He’s tired!!!!!
Baby’s thrive on a routine
An hour after newborns wake up they need to be put to bed
Now when my newborn cries after an hour of being up I’m not starting to feed her
I put her to bed abs then she wakes up when she’s hungry
Mommy’s you don’t have to go through the same torture I did by thinking my baby was hungry every hour
That’s not true bf va ya can go 2 hours!!
If not then they are snacking and it’s a horrible cycle!!
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