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Forum
-> Relationships
-> Guests
cassandra
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 Thu, Jan 22 2009, 10:31 am
I always give a reason. I think two of the times it was Yom Tov, and once we were going away and another time we were already invited out somewhere else. I don't remember the third, but I always give a reason. (And the sad thing is that we aren't so popular that we're always out-- I don't usually have to reject invites.)
I think it's too cheeky to ask for an alternate date, but if I really cared to socialize with these people I would have invited them to me at some point instead.
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zaq
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Thu, Jan 22 2009, 10:36 am
Let's have some time for the other side--I ought to make this a spinoff, but...
Ladies, if someone is hounding you with invites that you don't want to accept, are you sloughing them off with weak excuses hoping they'll "get the message" and leave you alone, or are you being honest and saying "we appreciate your invitations and would love to accept, but we don't go out on Shabbos because it's our only chance to spend quality time alone together" or whatever the reason is?
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Clarissa
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Thu, Jan 22 2009, 10:56 am
How do people handle it when they're really not interested? I have two friends, I'll call them Friend A and Friend B. They only know each other through me. One time they wound up together without me, on their way home from something.
Friend A: I've really enjoyed getting to know you. We should get together sometime.
Friend B: Thanks, but I really feel like I have enough friends, and not enough time to see them.
I don't know why Friend B didn't just say, "Sure that would be nice." On the other hand, this makes me think about people repeatedly rejecting, not because of being busy, but because of not being interested. Should they be honest? Or is that cruel?
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dillie
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Thu, Jan 22 2009, 10:59 am
| Clarissa wrote: |
Friend A: I've really enjoyed getting to know you. We should get together sometime.
Friend B: Thanks, but I really feel like I have enough friends, and not enough time to see them.
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That may be an honest response, but it's a pretty stupid thing to say. Nothing wrong with a little polite prevarication- it keeps the wheels of society greased.
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Clarissa
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Thu, Jan 22 2009, 11:01 am
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Absolutely. I love Friend B but she isn't greasing society's wheels.
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