Moving to America | Imamother

amother

Sun, Aug 31 2014, 4:04 am

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amother

Sun, Aug 31 2014, 4:05 am

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amother

Sun, Aug 31 2014, 4:07 am

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amother

Sun, Aug 31 2014, 4:15 am

amother wrote:

Are you chareidi or yeshivish? There's a world of difference and your answer will influence where you should go.

What specifically are you looking for with schools?

I'm in Cleveland and happy here. But I miss Yerushalayim tremendously.

I forgot to add - Are you happy to live in cleveland? Did you regret your decision at all? Sorry it's personal, this is so hard for me..

amother

Sun, Aug 31 2014, 7:02 am

For the sake of narrowing down communities, can I ask what's in America that you can't find in Israel? I mean... IMO Israel has the best chinuch, and I'm guessing it's not about being near family if you are looking all over America, so if there's some particular thing in America that you are looking for then maybe let us know since you are anon anyway, and we can help you find it? obv. don't have to if you are uncomfortable, but the idea of leaving Israel and going to America for chinuch confuses me.

(though my kids are also still young, so take it with a grain of salt.)

Oh, and I do think Baltimore is good, and has anyone mentioned Atlanta?

Ruchel

Sun, Aug 31 2014, 8:24 am

Check my threads on America, there are great suggestions.

Look into Baltimore, Cleveland, Chicago, Cincinnati

I personnally would stay away from NY area but that's me.

As for chinuch in Israel I assume they have the best level of kodesh of everywhere else- but if you want your son in a yeshivish environment and also graduating chol options are (growing) but small.

amother

Sun, Aug 31 2014, 8:34 am

Baltimore has 2 boys and 2 girls options. Boys: TA and TI. TI is more cheder style and would probably be your best bet but they dont always have room, depends on the grade. The chevra there is how you describe yourselves.
TA is a community yeshiva. Has plently of great families but more of a range. We are pretty yeshivish and send to TA and are very happy and feel like our son has many great friends to choose from. But there is definitely a mix. (100% shomer shabbos of course.). There is also a coed frum school which has taken more of the modern families away from TA so even the less yeshivish families there are mostly "just plain frum" as opposed to modern.
I have to write about girls a little later.

PinkFridge

Sun, Aug 31 2014, 9:45 am

amother wrote:

I think the biggest issues with issue with communities out of by and nj are the schools the lifestyle is overall a simple one however when it comes to schools there is little variety. Because these communities are smaller you will have a broad spectrum of religious families in the schools because the community isn't that large. Even places where there are 2-3 schools it is often 1 coed ,1 Chabad and one for eveyone else.
Try Cleveland or Chicago. Not the greatest of weather though. Or if you are willing to move to canada. Toronto is a great community.

If chinuch is your number one priority you are best off in New York like Brooklyn or far rockaway or Lakewood. Sorry

I think there are fabulous chinuch options in the bolded cities, don't get me wrong. But the US isn't a wasteland. There are good options OOT. The wholesomeness of out of town living is important to factor in.
I am NOT saying that one can't raise wholesome kids in town, just that it may take a lot more work.

ETA: sorry for the small font size. Am trying to fix this.

PinkFridge

Sun, Aug 31 2014, 9:48 am

amother wrote:

Also, what is detroit like? I haven't looked into it at all.

Check out threads on Detroit.

morah

Sun, Aug 31 2014, 9:57 am

amother wrote:

I have to second this. What are you looking for that you can't seem to find elsewhere in Israel? A lot of good suggestions here, but you need to clearly articulate your needs lest you find yourselves trading one set of problems for another.

miriamnechama

Sun, Aug 31 2014, 12:14 pm

amother wrote:

I personally live in Monsey and am very happy here but I think Baltimore sounds like it may be right for you. Out of town and people are less "gashmiyusdik" (is that a word?) there than in NY/NJ from what I've seen visiting there. There are some wonderful people there, people seem to be friendly and have good middos. Weather is definitely warmer than a place like Toronto or Chicago.

I was just thinking of monsey, my sister moved to monsey from BP last week...

amother

Sun, Aug 31 2014, 12:50 pm

hi, I am the poster that was writing about boys schools in Baltimore. Now for the girls schools: Bais Yaakov or Bnos Yisroel. Bais Yaakov is the community school. It is large but has a great reputation. There are about 6 classes per grade but they try to keep the classes small (around 20) so the girls don't get lost. It is also diverse. Many many amazing families like yours, also some who are not as yeshivish. The girls all get along well and respect each other. Each year, of the graduating class, many girls go to super yeshivish seminaries like Hadar, BJJ etc and many also go to Michlalah etc. It is the beauty of Baltimore that all these girls go to school together and are friendly with each other.
Bnos Yisroel-newer and smaller. It tries to focus more on middos than academics though they have a decent academic program also. It tends to get a lot of Baalei teshuva families who are very strong now but whose parents didn't grow up going to Bais Yaakov so feel less of a connection to that school. Also Lubavitch and Chassidish families tend to send more to Bnos Yisroel.

As for shuls and people to look up to, I would recommend Rabbi Berger's shul (Kol Torah). It is big but the Bergers are amazing incredible people and the shul is so full of positive Torah energy. It is a combination of young kollel families and families that were previously in kollel but are now working.

In general, I am sure you have heard this, but America is VERY expensive. Tuition at Baltimore schools can be between 8-10 thousand dollars per year at the elementary level (lower end for girls, higher end for boys). They do give scholarships but there's only so much they can give-they have to pay their bills and there is no government assistance. (no bussing either-you'll need to carpool). Many people I know earn over 100,000 here and are very tight financially. So please make sure it is financially viable to move here before you leave E"Y.

That being said, Baltimore is a really terrific community that has something for everyone. We love it here! feel free to post more questions.

amother

Sun, Aug 31 2014, 1:15 pm

What about Minneapolis?

Or, if you're thinking you will end up in NY, because you want something less diverse than an out of town community (less diverse schools, I mean), what about Queens? Kew Gardens or KGH? You can find Charedi crowds in both places.

Anon cause I lived there.

Shuly

Sun, Aug 31 2014, 1:16 pm

St. Louis is really nice and would be a great fit for you.

amother

Sun, Aug 31 2014, 1:21 pm

amother wrote:

Many people I know earn over 100,000 here and are very tight financially. So please make sure it is financially viable to move here before you leave E"Y.

Is that also those who don't have a rent to pay?

amother

Sun, Aug 31 2014, 1:42 pm

morah wrote:

Sorry for the confusion! We are not thinking of moving for chinuch reasons- as mentioned, the best chinuch is here. We're thinking of moving for various reasons, including being part of a more positive and stressful environment. Whenever we visit my family (my husband is from Europe), we're always shocked at how nice people are in america. It makes a difference and really influences your mood. Also, living here can be very stressful and exhausting, and we don't want to pass that on to our children. I'd rather live in America and be a little bit more calm (though I know America has its own stresses, too!), than living here and hurting my children. These are only a few of the reasons. I love Israel, and it has a very special simplicity and genuity that I haven't seen anywhere else. But we're not sure it's enough to keep us here.

amother

Sun, Aug 31 2014, 1:42 pm

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amother

Sun, Aug 31 2014, 1:50 pm

amother wrote:

Thank you so much for all this information about the schools. It was very helfpul! Baltimore does sound like the best option for us. I am very worried about the financial aspect - how do people do it??? Our income is such a small fraction of the figure you quoted, I don't know how we'd survive. Are there scholarship options, etc? BH my family has offered to help with the purchase of a house (of course, only in america, not in Israel..), which is a big deal. Would that alleviate the figure you mentioned? We are also very simple and don't need to eat out or make any big purchases. I'm the type to spend 5 minutes debating a 5 shekel item in the grocery store... Smile

What about the weather? Is it freezing in the winter and boiling in the summer? Also, is it a nice place to walk around? I tried to see on google maps (haha), and it looked similar to Passaic (where I lived for a while).

Thanks in advance!

amother

Sun, Aug 31 2014, 1:52 pm

PinkFridge wrote:

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I think there are fabulous chinuch options in the bolded cities, don't get me wrong. But the US isn't a wasteland. There are good options OOT. The wholesomeness of out of town living is important to factor in.
I am NOT saying that one can't raise wholesome kids in town, just that it may take a lot more work.

ETA: sorry for the small font size. Am trying to fix this.

I agree with you - which is why I made the original post!

amother

Sun, Aug 31 2014, 1:54 pm

Shuly wrote:

St. Louis is really nice and would be a great fit for you.

What is the community like?