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-> Parenting our children
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amother
OP
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 Wed, Nov 29 2023, 8:24 pm
Dd has daily tantrums kicking walls stamping feet throwing down chairs, pushing the table and extremely vocal screaming. This happens minimum nightly. If something doesn't go her way. If I tell her anything she doesn't like to hear....is this normal? I feel like I've had it. !!!!!!!!
Advice????chizzuk???how to handle????
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amother
Aquamarine
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Wed, Nov 29 2023, 8:25 pm
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No this is not typical for an 11 year old.
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amother
Heather
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Wed, Nov 29 2023, 8:27 pm
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You need a neuropsych eval
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amother
Valerian
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Wed, Nov 29 2023, 8:32 pm
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My pandas child has been like that at that age.
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amother
Lemonchiffon
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Wed, Nov 29 2023, 10:01 pm
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Was she always like this, or is this a new thing?
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amother
Pewter
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Wed, Nov 29 2023, 10:17 pm
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My daughter is 13 and the same way. I feel like it’s exacerbated when she goes to sleep late. I always wonder if it’s pandas but I feel like she’s always been that way. Is your daughter immature? My daughter is socially immature too.
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amother
DarkViolet
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Wed, Nov 29 2023, 10:18 pm
No, this is not normal. How's her behavior in general? Is this a new thing? How's her behavior in school? Does she act up in school?
I think that you should have her evaluated, as well as getting thorough comprehensive blood work done. Good luck!
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amother
Ivory
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Wed, Nov 29 2023, 10:33 pm
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My child was explosive at 11 and a very early teenager. We did therapy for a little over a year, once a week for her and once a week parent sessions. It was a big help, she learnt how to identify and manage her emotions better and we learnt to understand her, communicate better and build a better relationship. It was a real game changer. There doesn't have to be anything medical or neurodivergent going on. I'm not a stranger to that!
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amother
OP
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Wed, Nov 29 2023, 10:45 pm
So dd has been doing tantrums sinceshes been a toddler. This is ongoing so I can't say it's new. It's just getting crazier and harder to put up with as the family and my responsibility as a mother grows.
I have a 12 yr old dd that would never do such...
I thought about therapy many times but don't know who to ask,also have hard time trusting anyone with a child. She annoys the whole family. It's out of hand .I do think the child has a touch of anxiety.but again who do I see for that? Definitely when she's tired it's worse.
In school she acts fine. She isn't great socially..meaning still never picked up a best friend...but according to her teachers she's very mature and smart...tries pleasing . And Quietly think to myself oh sure! Mature? If you would only know how she ruins my nights ,wakes up my little ones from her screaming....and takes my most energy....but of course I'd never say that to teacher.
Had such a misreble nt ...I must do something about it!!!!
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amother
Aconite
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Wed, Nov 29 2023, 11:17 pm
| amother OP wrote: | So dd has been doing tantrums sinceshes been a toddler. This is ongoing so I can't say it's new. It's just getting crazier and harder to put up with as the family and my responsibility as a mother grows.
I have a 12 yr old dd that would never do such...
I thought about therapy many times but don't know who to ask,also have hard time trusting anyone with a child. She annoys the whole family. It's out of hand .I do think the child has a touch of anxiety.but again who do I see for that? Definitely when she's tired it's worse.
In school she acts fine. She isn't great socially..meaning still never picked up a best friend...but according to her teachers she's very mature and smart...tries pleasing . And Quietly think to myself oh sure! Mature? If you would only know how she ruins my nights ,wakes up my little ones from her screaming....and takes my most energy....but of course I'd never say that to teacher.
Had such a misreble nt ...I must do something about it!!!! |
Get her evaluated
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amother
Ivory
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Wed, Nov 29 2023, 11:45 pm
| amother OP wrote: | So dd has been doing tantrums sinceshes been a toddler. This is ongoing so I can't say it's new. It's just getting crazier and harder to put up with as the family and my responsibility as a mother grows.
I have a 12 yr old dd that would never do such...
I thought about therapy many times but don't know who to ask,also have hard time trusting anyone with a child. She annoys the whole family. It's out of hand .I do think the child has a touch of anxiety.but again who do I see for that? Definitely when she's tired it's worse.
In school she acts fine. She isn't great socially..meaning still never picked up a best friend...but according to her teachers she's very mature and smart...tries pleasing . And Quietly think to myself oh sure! Mature? If you would only know how she ruins my nights ,wakes up my little ones from her screaming....and takes my most energy....but of course I'd never say that to teacher.
Had such a misreble nt ...I must do something about it!!!! |
Is she working so hard to hold herself together and do what she is supposed to in school all day that by the time she comes home she is exhausted and done and therefore losing herself?
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amother
Heather
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Wed, Nov 29 2023, 11:52 pm
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It sounds like possible adhd or asd definitely go for an evaluation
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amother
Snowflake
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Thu, Nov 30 2023, 1:20 am
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My dd does this, I got her diagnosed with adhd and asd and it is being addressed through aba
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amother
NeonOrange
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Thu, Nov 30 2023, 1:43 am
| amother OP wrote: | So dd has been doing tantrums sinceshes been a toddler. This is ongoing so I can't say it's new. It's just getting crazier and harder to put up with as the family and my responsibility as a mother grows.
I have a 12 yr old dd that would never do such...
I thought about therapy many times but don't know who to ask,also have hard time trusting anyone with a child. She annoys the whole family. It's out of hand .I do think the child has a touch of anxiety.but again who do I see for that? Definitely when she's tired it's worse.
In school she acts fine. She isn't great socially..meaning still never picked up a best friend...but according to her teachers she's very mature and smart...tries pleasing . And Quietly think to myself oh sure! Mature? If you would only know how she ruins my nights ,wakes up my little ones from her screaming....and takes my most energy....but of course I'd never say that to teacher.
Had such a misreble nt ...I must do something about it!!!! |
This is my daughter to a tea (except she has depression too, which we hadn't realized).
We just finished a neuropsych eval and she has very high functioning ASD. Girls are really good at masking especially outside the house. The teachers saw the social issues with finding a good friend, but she is smart, derech eretz, great student. Also at this ge it can get worse and you see it more. Please get her evaluated.
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amother
OP
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Thu, Nov 30 2023, 2:01 am
When you say evaluated can you tell me by whom?where do I go? She gets speech therapy from board of Ed. They also gave her counseling but there's no guidance counselor in her school. Who does these kind of evals? Is it covered by insurance? What does asd mean? I don't think she's ADHD .
she also has this very emotional side to herself. She can be super caring and ready to be all perfect and help me at home and she'll go do my grocery shopping. But one thing doesn't go her way,one bump and there's an explosion!!!
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amother
Lightgray
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Thu, Nov 30 2023, 2:03 am
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I have a daughter like this, but it's definitely not asd, she does well socially. For anyone saying she needs therapy, ya, but how can I get her to go? She's a strong minded woman!
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amother
OP
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Thu, Nov 30 2023, 2:04 am
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I'm located in boro park. Pls guide me if you have any references,I'm clueless,where I should go, whom to call. Thanks so much!
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amother
OP
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Thu, Nov 30 2023, 2:06 am
| amother Lightgray wrote: | | I have a daughter like this, but it's definitely not asd, she does well socially. For anyone saying she needs therapy, ya, but how can I get her to go? She's a strong minded woman! |
Yea so is mine! But I'm at the end of my rope . This girl is also suffering. Lemme help both of us.
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