Wild 6 yo | Imamother

amother

Mon, Dec 18 2023, 8:12 pm

What would you do with a wild 6 yo who is no longer responding to incentives/charts/small positive rewards and there are no consequences I can think of that would work?
I need him to get to bed but he’s not listening. He’s running around shouting and waking up the other kids.

amother

Nasturtium

Mon, Dec 18 2023, 8:13 pm

My three year old is on this path and I think he has sensory issues or ADD or something.
He got board of ed evaluation but it was barely anything not very informative . I might go private.
It’s hard I sometimes feel I need to shadow him his waking hours.

amother

Mon, Dec 18 2023, 8:15 pm

A therapist is involved but I’m crowdsourcing for ideas here. He doesn’t have adhd (or if he does it’s pretty mild and medication is not appropriate here)

amother

Nasturtium

Mon, Dec 18 2023, 8:16 pm

amother OP wrote:

A therapist is involved but I’m crowdsourcing for ideas here. He doesn’t have adhd (or if he does it’s pretty mild and medication is not appropriate here)

I think my kid is disregulafed and probably because of sensory issues.
What’s your son’s therapist for.

amother

Moccasin

Mon, Dec 18 2023, 8:17 pm

Physically take his hand and put him back in bed. I'd stand outside the door and hold the door nob so he can't open it. I would also punish tomorrow. When he wants something special you say no sorry you didn't stay in bed you can't have it.

Dolly Welsh

Mon, Dec 18 2023, 8:20 pm

Could the six year old be afraid of the dark? Or the complete absence of people, if you just put him down with a kiss and leave right away? Nobody likes that. Stick around in a chair in semi-darkness until he is asleep. He WILL fall asleep.

Sudden changes from being UP to being in bed like a filed document in a file drawer and expected to just lie there with the darkness alone can be hard.

It is good to reduce the lights a little as bed time approaches. The kid(s) should not feel the parents are now going to have a great time and they are being forced to "leave the party."

Even if that is true. The kid(s) must not know that. Act as if the party is entirely over. The kid is not missing anything.

This is assuming that kid has had enough exercise during the day. If he is very energetic, that's genetic. He must have enough strenuous physical things to do, so he's all played out by bed time. Being made to lie still when he still has un-expended physical or mental energy can be actually painful.

Just make sure he is not being upstaged by another child above or below him in age; give him plenty of attention during the day.

Sometimes a parent will unknowingly fuss more over another child, who seems to need it more. She may indeed need it more, but the six year old isn't going to be understanding. His needs have to be met too.

A vigorous boy needs rough-housing with his father. Enlist the father to throw him around, up, down over his head, all of that male physical rough play. Must be the father.

Tell the father in private that he must, must do this. Not in front of the boy.

Last edited by Dolly Welsh on Mon, Dec 18 2023, 8:27 pm; edited 1 time in total

amother

Snowdrop

Mon, Dec 18 2023, 8:22 pm

That’s a great way to make sure your child grows up believing that he is a bad kid.

amother

Nasturtium

Mon, Dec 18 2023, 8:25 pm

Dolly Welsh wrote:

Wow haven’t seen you in ages! 👋

Dolly Welsh

Mon, Dec 18 2023, 8:28 pm

Yes, ha ha. Hi.

amother

Viola

Mon, Dec 18 2023, 8:28 pm

His nervous system is dysregulated. This can happen for a number of reasons. There are things you can do to help him regulate.

Footsoak with Epsom salt and magnesium flakes
Diffuse essential oils in evening
Dim all lights in the house
Avoid blue lights and screens
Magnesium throughout the day
Remove inflammatory foods from his diet
Gaba, l theanine and 5htp can help induce sleepiness
Consider ndf sleepy from bioray
Calming sensory input before bed
Soft music, weighted blanket
Address mouth breathing, jaw, airway and bite issues if there are any
Tart cherry choose for natural melatonin

amother

Mon, Dec 18 2023, 8:54 pm

amother Nasturtium wrote:

Wow haven’t seen you in ages! 👋

Yes it’s really great to see you! Hi!

amother

Amaryllis

Mon, Dec 18 2023, 9:48 pm

Maybe there is something he would enjoy
Listening to like an audio book or music to help him stay in his bed. Make bedtime something he looks forward to instead of having it be like a punishment. A special lamp in his bedroom, a special pillow or stuffed animal, just examples.

amother

Broom

Mon, Dec 18 2023, 10:51 pm

Let him read books in bed.
My 7 yr old son falls asleep with a book every night, usually at 9:00,-9:30 I tell him to put it away and hes sleepy by then.