What’s something accepted in society that you are against?

amother

Chicory

Tue, Feb 20 2024, 4:37 pm

amother Lightyellow wrote:

Not watching your little kids and letting them be heckled until dark- hate this!!

And also when people leave their kids outside for other adults to watch. I don't offer free babysitting, don't assume I want to watch your kids just because I'm out with mine.

amother

Tuberose

Wed, Feb 21 2024, 3:06 am

Lifestyle Debt

I am ok with debt that is circumstancail (medical emergancy, job loss) or makes sense (mortgage)

But I don't get people buying things on cc or in payment plans. If you can afford it, get it - if you cant go without.

amother

Tiffanyblue

Wed, Feb 21 2024, 7:55 am

amother Ginger wrote:

Not having Healthcare for all citizens. I've lived in the US and in Israel, and while no system is perfect, I prefer socialized medicine by far.

Canadian healthcare is only great if you are healthy. You have to wait an insane amount of time for appts, tests etc.

amother

Skyblue

Wed, Feb 21 2024, 8:21 am

amother Cyclamen wrote:

Yep. But I didn't toe the line for it. I nicely told my couple that this is something I can't do. And I plan to do the same for my others too.

I hate cooking and I do the bare minimum. I work full time too and the last thing I want to do when I come home is host anyone. I'm exhausted and scrape together dinner for my family. I don't see why I need to turn my life upside down for two young, healthy married adults.

I lived in a different city to parents and in laws so started making suppers nearly immediately.

Did you go to your parents after your wedding for nightly dinners?

amother

Cyclamen

Wed, Feb 21 2024, 8:29 am

amother Skyblue wrote:

I lived in a different city to parents and in laws so started making suppers nearly immediately.

Did you go to your parents after your wedding for nightly dinners?

I started but stopped it very quickly. I'm one of the older ones and it was a big imposition on them.

I think its very unfair to the entire family to expected to be hosted in this way. Your mother has enough on her plate without needing to host a young couple. And its takes a way time and attention from the other kids at home.

Getting married means that you're capable of being independent, including preparing your own meals.

amother

Begonia

Wed, Feb 21 2024, 8:50 am

Landlords taking brokers for apartments, especially furnished apartments because they are too lazy to show their apartments and handle a few phone calls. I am NOT talking about landlords who live elsewhere or have different extenuating circumstances.

I think it’s ridiculous to have to pay an additional month of rent for someone who often doesn’t even go down to show the apartment. In many neighborhoods, a decent apartment will be taken very quickly! Why the brokerage?

Bnei Berak 10

Wed, Feb 21 2024, 12:21 pm

amother Begonia wrote:

For you it's ridiculous as you are they one who needs to pay.
Some landlords want their privacy.

amother

Skyblue

Wed, Feb 21 2024, 12:22 pm

amother Cyclamen wrote:

I don't disagree with you but I do think it's got to do with how you prep your children for marriage. Not necessarily to be a great cook but to confidence to attempt and experiment in the kitchen.

I think when young couples go to eat at parents, it's not entirely about the supper, It's about the family connection and support from parents. Not sure I am explaining it. I felt like I was thrown to cope on my own. I really needed that family time and familiarity during marriage adjustment period.

I hope my children will come to me at least occasionally for suppers but let's talk then...

amother

DarkMagenta

Wed, Feb 21 2024, 1:57 pm

Bnei Berak 10 wrote:

For you it's ridiculous as you are they one who needs to pay.
Some landlords want their privacy.

I don't understand don't usually landlords pay the agent? That's how I did it.

GLUE

Wed, Feb 21 2024, 2:01 pm

amother DarkMagenta wrote:

I don't understand don't usually landlords pay the agent? That's how I did it.

Many places the agent does free listing for landlords and tenant's pay about a month rent to the agent.

amother

Molasses

Wed, Feb 21 2024, 2:47 pm

Bringing up children with zero marketable skills and less fiscal responsibility, then encouraging them to marry young, produce as many children as soon as possible, and repeat the cycle with the next generation, relying on government programs and the generosity of strangers to keep them afloat.

amother

Chicory

Wed, Feb 21 2024, 2:49 pm

amother Skyblue wrote:

I hate to tell you this but if you're emotionally mature enough to get married you should be able to cope on your own.
Why do you need family support during meals?

Ema of 5

Wed, Feb 21 2024, 3:34 pm

amother Chicory wrote:

I hate to tell you this but if you're emotionally mature enough to get married you should be able to cope on your own.
Why do you need family support during meals?

I get it. Even for someone who is emotionally mature, marriage is still a chance and an adjustment. Nothing wrong with having support. It’s not specifically during the meal that they have support, it’s just that the support is THERE and they can SEE it. They don’t have to call or text or whatever. They SEE that their family is available, they’re not totally on their own. Knowing that their family is available doesn’t mean they are not emotionally mature enough to get married.
I don’t think it needs to be every night or every shabbos or whatever, but occasionally can be a good thing. I agree that it shouldn’t turn into something that’s a pressure for the mom or family, or that the other siblings start to resent. I can see how that could happen, if the entire focus becomes on the new couple, every single time they are in the house.

Ema of 5

Wed, Feb 21 2024, 3:35 pm

amother Chicory wrote:

I hate to tell you this but if you're emotionally mature enough to get married you should be able to cope on your own.
Why do you need family support during meals?