Who wants to join me? 30 day challenge

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Forum -> Parenting our children

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amother

Fri, Mar 10 2023, 2:05 pm

Of no raising our voice at our kids. Or spouse. Of biting back our tongue and letting certain things slide. And to come here to share your success (and if you need a place to explode... Laugh

amother

Emerald

Fri, Mar 10 2023, 2:26 pm

Me...

But I need to start gradually. One thing at a time for me. I'll start with the kids because of how much they express to me verbally how much it bothers them when I yell.

amother

Lightpink

Fri, Mar 10 2023, 3:44 pm

omg me, but I dont know if I am capable....

little neshamala

Fri, Mar 10 2023, 3:46 pm

Love this. So worthwhile

amother

Daisy

Sat, Mar 11 2023, 5:32 pm

I should so join but how? How do I stop myself in the moment? Can we offer tips and strategies?

SG18

Sat, Mar 11 2023, 6:02 pm

Yes, I'm in.
I've heard to choose to whisper when you catch yourself yelling.

amother

Brunette

Sat, Mar 11 2023, 6:25 pm

meeeeeeee
not gonna say im not scared...

amother

Rose

Sat, Mar 11 2023, 6:35 pm

Me.

Tips on gaining cooperation would be greatly appreciated.

Don’t hug this. I don’t raise my voice, I just lecture. And it doesn’t help. So this is my 30 day challenge- no lectures.

amother

Iris

Sat, Mar 11 2023, 6:48 pm

Me. I shout way too often Sad

nachi

Sat, Mar 11 2023, 6:56 pm

BrisketBoss

Sat, Mar 11 2023, 8:39 pm

amother Rose wrote:

Me.

Tips on gaining cooperation would be greatly appreciated.

Don’t hug this. I don’t raise my voice, I just lecture. And it doesn’t help. So this is my 30 day challenge- no lectures.

As always I recommend collaborative problem solving. If you read one of Ross Greene's books or go to his website, Lives in the Balance, you can find more details. But basically you want to talk with instead of to your kids. It starts with finding out from the source--the kid--what difficulties they are having meeting your expectations. The idea is that if they could, they would. For all of us life is easier when we can meet expectations.

amother

Cobalt

Sat, Mar 11 2023, 8:50 pm

What drives me NUUUUUTS is when my kids won't communicate. They can be just screaming and screaming but won't answer any questions so I can't help them. Maybe they're tired or hungry or whatever but I just don't know how to handle it when I can't troubleshoot.

amother

Rainbow

Sat, Mar 11 2023, 9:48 pm

I’m in but it’s gonna be HARD! Especially this time of year..

amother

Rainbow

Sat, Mar 11 2023, 9:49 pm

amother Cobalt wrote:

I have a kid that does exactly this!! He can scream for hours literally. It’s so so hard

amother

Sat, Mar 11 2023, 10:46 pm

How'd you all do today? I did pretty well BH

amother

Rose

Sun, Mar 12 2023, 7:29 am

amother OP wrote:

How'd you all do today? I did pretty well BH

All I have done so far is send my kids to cheder, but when one was taking forever to get dressed I just let him be. He got it done eventually. At the last minute but at least I wasn’t stressed.

amother

Ghostwhite

Sun, Mar 12 2023, 7:37 am

Not an easy time of year to start, but going to try. BL”N!!

Rappel

Sun, Mar 12 2023, 7:38 am

No yelling yet today, but I've been working all morning, and I'm tired and thirsty and very late-stage pregnancy, and about to pick all the kids up by foot. Danger zone...

Wish me luck!

Rappel

Sun, Mar 12 2023, 3:12 pm

I've returned to report success! BH.

amother

Salmon

Sun, Mar 12 2023, 4:42 pm

Depending on how hard this is for you it might be better especially for long term results to start with one part of the day, morning, afternoon or evening.

Also try to see what is setting you off and really work on getting to the bottom of it.

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