how can they ask this much?

ora_43

Mon, Sep 12 2011, 12:10 pm

It's been years since I babysat, and I was earning $7-$8 an hour in America (for three kids) and 28 shekels an hour in Israel (same).

slushiemom, are those rates for nighttime babysitting? I could see maybe hiring someone to help out in the afternoon for that rate, while I'm here, but I don't think I could pay that little to go out at night. More like 25 an hour.

Tutoring for $40 an hour is not at all the same as a $90,000 a year salary. That "hour" includes preparing the lesson, getting to and from the lesson, and usually, making and grading assignments. It usually comes out to more like $13-$15 an hour. And each person is only giving one hour a week of work and that's not guaranteed; almost nobody manages to tutor 8 hours a day.

I agree with sim's explanation re: pricing.

Fox

Mon, Sep 12 2011, 12:41 pm

sim wrote:

Sometimes sitters charge more for larger families or for families that have a reputation for being difficult to babysit.

My DDs babysit a lot, and they generally get around $10 (Chicago). They get slightly less for a single child or if the bulk of the babysitting takes place after the kids are genuinely asleep. Why so much? Here are a few of the reasons:

1. Trust me, your kids are nowhere near as well behaved or adorable as you think they are. While I'm obviously not speaking directly to the OP or any specific poster, my DDs have encountered plenty of young mothers who are certain that their children are so enchanting that people will be willing to babysit for peanuts. Actually, the relationship is often the inverse: the mothers who think their kids are perfect often have the most difficult kids, and the mothers who cheerfully admit that their kids can be bratty often have kids who are surprisingly cooperative.

2. You get what you pay for. Yes, you can get a 12-year-old girl with no training and limited experience. Or you can hire a girl who takes her job seriously: CPR and first aid certified; well-read on child development; ready to interact with the kids, including make cookies or do a craft . . .

3. Expect to pay premium for last-minute bookings; requiring a girl to provide her own transportation both to and from your home; ridiculously late hours; cooking dinner for your kids, etc.

4. Expect to pay premium if you or your kids develop a bad reputation. My DDs have enough babysitting offers to be choosy about their clients. Some of the ways people get marked off their list include: kids who repeatedly hit, kick, or otherwise engage in violence against the sitter or siblings; helicopter mothers who want reports of eating, elimination, and educational activities in which their child engaged that would make nursing charts seem haphazard by comparison; paying too little for the circumstances. Now, I admit that last one is pretty subjective, but I've seen some doozies: the mother of 5 under 5 (all awake and needing attention) who wanted to pay $5 per hour; the family that never seemed to have money on them and always promised to drop off a check -- only to require significant collection efforts; the family with a dog that bit my DD . . . These folks find my DDs to be inexplicably busy when they call, and most of my DDs' friends have become "busy," too.

5. Convenience costs. We all understand that buying pre-checked lettuce is going to cost more than if we wash and check our own lettuce. Well, the same is true for babysitters. If you expect to be able to text the babysitter (which most of my DDs' clients not only expect but actually demand); if you require the girl to provide her own transportation both ways (which an increasing number of my DDs' clients require); if you want to be able to call from you cell phone to announce that you're running late . . . no problem, but you'll have to pay.

All that said, I do agree that girls should be strongly urged to consider their babysitting efforts as a "real" business, and that they should be as professional as possible. That means becoming certified in CPR and first aid; receiving some kind of babysitting training; be prepared to interact with the kids in positive ways, including an activity of some kind. While doing homework or chatting on the phone is a nice perk (just like taking a few minutes on imamother is a nice perk for many of us at work), it should never be assumed by either the employer or the babysitter that such a situation is the norm.

I'll also add some items my DDs have mentioned about how to become a highly-prized client -- the kind who is never turned down or for whom favors will be called in from 3rd Grade if a girl genuinely isn't available:

* Pay in cash. Most young girls don't have their own checking accounts, so you are effectively using their parents as your bank or ATM. Having the cash ready and rounding up to the next $5 mark is a nice way to show that you value your sitter's time and convenience.

* Always describe your kids as more trouble than they really are. Sitters prefer to brace themselves for a difficult night and be pleasantly surprised.

* If you are temporarily having financial difficulties, be honest and ask the sitter to help you as a chesed. This one actually surprised me. I figured most girls would rather get something than nothing. However, all the girls I've talked to agreed on this. Obviously, you can't use this approach constantly, but my DDs and their friends would rather help someone out for nothing occasionally than feel they are being underpaid.

* Find a couple of sitters you like and stick with them. Don't bounce around, constantly comparison shopping. This allows the sitter to build a relationship with your children and adjust to your home and expectations. Sitters hate feeling that their clients are constantly shopping for a better deal.

* Reward and recommend. If you find a really fabulous sitter, pay her rate b'leiv simcha and recommend her to your friends. Try to remember her on her birthday or Chanukah or Purim or the beginning of school: something from the dollar store is fine. I can't tell you how proud my girls are when their clients show up on various occasions, sometimes with handmade crafts, to present to them.

* Praises instead of raises: I was once asked by a parent not to pay a babysitter as much as was currently being charged for large-ish families. So I took the difference and made a contribution to the girl's school, asking that it be applied to her family's pledge to raise balance. I also spoke with her principal and praised her.

FranticFrummie

Mon, Sep 12 2011, 12:58 pm

Well, I'm no teen (LOL!), but I charge $10 an hour, for multiple kids, kids in diapers, light housekeeping and preparing meals. I also take on "difficult" kids because I refuse to be manipulated by bratty behavior. Personally I think I'm worth more, but that seems to be all anyone is willing or capable of paying these days.

MrsDash

Mon, Sep 12 2011, 1:17 pm

In my Junior/High school years, I never specifically told the parents how much I charge, and I got paid $10 an hour.

Chayalle

Mon, Sep 12 2011, 1:28 pm

Monsey Mama wrote:

I don't like paying it either. What is really expensive is the cost of a tutor. I tried to get BY girl to tutor. They wanted $35 - $45 an hour. No where else could a girl earn the equivalent of $70,000 to $90,000 a year. I was told the girls need the money for seminary. No one would tutor for even $20.00/$25.00 hr.

A tutor is not a salaried employee. You are paying for a service, on a part-time basis, hence the higher cost.

tikva18

Mon, Sep 12 2011, 1:29 pm

When I sat I was paid whatever the parents wanted to give me. If I were asked, then I'd tell them $1/hr. However, that was, ahem, a long time ago Smile

.

My children have been difficult and it's been hard to get sitters where we currently live. Fortunately, my older boys are now old enough and I rely on them (one's away). If I'm going to an event or having a nice night out with my dh then I pay my ds $3/hr, if I'm doing something different then I don't pay him at all.

I can't afford paying a sitter and going out - so before my kids were old enough we rarely went out. Occasionally a neighbor girl would sit. We do have a dog and I know that's a big deterrent to some girls.

abound

Mon, Sep 12 2011, 1:54 pm

FranticFrummie wrote:

Are you in Israel? Confused

chocolate moose

Mon, Sep 12 2011, 2:09 pm

Fox, believ e it or not, I used to really love kids.

My favorite Holiday bonus was a framed picture of my little charges, and when I could afford it, I babysat every Sunday for free for a mom who needed a little time to herself.

saw50st8

Mon, Sep 12 2011, 2:19 pm

amother wrote:

I am a 27 year old imamother and I got $10.00 and hour 10 years ago. I pay about $12.00 an hour now if I use a high school girl and that seems to be the standard in my community. My sister gets paid about $15.00 if she babysits and she is in college. I don't think $10.00 is unreasonable at all.

I'm 29 and I used to get $10/hr.

I pay $10/hr now, Why should they be embarrassed? you dont like the cost, don't hire them.

ewa-jo

Mon, Sep 12 2011, 2:19 pm

abound wrote:

FranticFrummie wrote:

Are you in Israel? Confused

I wanna know too. Jerusalem, maybe?

Hashemlovesme

Mon, Sep 12 2011, 2:34 pm

wow, I pay like 10-15 SHEKEL an hour, & still rarely go out b/c e/t adds up in the end.

abby1776

Mon, Sep 12 2011, 2:42 pm

People pay hispanic ladies $10 an hour to clean their house. Having a reliable person to watch your children isnt worth as much? I never understand why people complain about the cost of childcare. Arent your children the most important thing in your life (along with DH of course) and arent they worth at least 10 an hour?

morah

Mon, Sep 12 2011, 2:53 pm

Who are all these 23 year olds who got $5 an hour as teens? I'm also 23 and I always got $10 an hour.

tikva18

Mon, Sep 12 2011, 2:53 pm

It's not about worth, obviously they are worth thousands and millions more, it's about affordability. That's why we just didn't go out for the past who knows how many years. Dh and I go on a 'date' maybe once or twice a year if we're lucky.

MamaBear

Mon, Sep 12 2011, 3:06 pm

I pay $9-10 an hr and it's mainly for after bedtime. The most they do is put the older kids to bed and as far as I know, the kids are complete angels (ha, not on my watch but for other people).

I would feel horrible coming home after 2 hrs and handing over a ten dollar bill. I pay well, it's an easy gig, and we have high school girls thrilled to come over. The last thing I want is a teenager who feels underpaid and wonders why she bothers coming here.

MrsDash

Mon, Sep 12 2011, 3:16 pm

I've only had family (who are unwilling to accept money, but love gifts Smile

) babysit for my child. If I were to hire a babysitter, and obviously someone that I know well, I wouldn't mind paying the going rate of $10 - $15 an hour. It's basically one on one, individual attention. Not like a playgroup, where there are many children to look after, and they only charge $200 a month, which comes out to $2 something an hour.

Chayalle

Mon, Sep 12 2011, 3:21 pm

morah wrote:

Who are all these 23 year olds who got $5 an hour as teens? I'm also 23 and I always got $10 an hour.

I would guess it has alot to do with the cost of living in your area in general. It seems to me that NYC and other "cities" are more expensive than suburban areas.....however some "fancier" suburban areas can be more expensive, as well.

I live in Lakewood, and things are cheaper here in general. I was paying $7 an hour for babysitters when my girls (now 12 1/2 and 10) were little.

Chana Miriam S

Mon, Sep 12 2011, 3:28 pm

I made about $7 bucks an hour when I was babysitting between 1979 and about 1986. I don't need to pay babysitters anymore and my daughter who is 12, is certified by the red cross as a babysitter and who is a real get down and play kind of kid, is being paid $10 an hour. As far as I can tell, she did not request this much money and the parents have paid her whatever the going rate was, which it seems is around $10 an hour.

When I needed day care, at first I was mortified at the cost but then I realized that you get what you pay for and my baby was my most precious thing. I did shop for a mix of cost and convenience as well as excellent care. I had a great provider who was just amazing and who really treated my baby like he was the only one on earth, along with the others in her charge.

ElTam

Mon, Sep 12 2011, 3:34 pm

Quote:

I pay $8 an hour, unless it is daytime and all the kids are up. I don't think your comparison is a good one. I try to always plan it so the kids are 100% ready for bed and all the babysitter has to do (at most) is read one story and listen to them say Shema. If I can, I'll get them in bed first.

I always make sure there are drinks and snacks for the sitter and tell her to help herself. If we are out late, I tell her it's fine to go to sleep. I provide transportation home (and to my house if it is not very close or if it is snowing/raining).

So, I am not asking them to clean my house; I am asking them to sit in my house while my kids sleep and I go to a chasunah or whatever. If the kids are awake, of course I pay more. I have a college degree and I would take $8 to sit on someone's sofa, talk on the phone and read a book.

obagys

Mon, Sep 12 2011, 3:58 pm

Growing up, I was generally paid $3 or $4 an hour. The going rate now seems to be $5-$7 an hour. I have 6 kids 10yr and under, K"H, and I know they are not angels by any means. If anyone requested $10/hr from me, I wouldn't like it from a financial standpoint, but I would certainly understand it. Babysitting (my kids anyway) is a lot of work!

Then again, there is one sitter I sometimes use that pretty much plays computer games most of the time she's here and eats freely. I mean really EATS, not just a small snack. If she asked for $10 an hour I would be upset.