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Why, why WHY don't you keep your sick kids at home?!
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Barbara




 
 
 
 

Post Mon, Nov 19 2012, 2:35 pm
curlgirl wrote:
happy mom1 wrote:
curlgirl wrote:
happy mom1 wrote:
Tamiri wrote:
Kids in day care get sick. A lot. If you want your child to have a better chance at getting thru cold/flu/sick season and staying healthy, get a nanny to stay at home with him/her. I think that's the only way.

And what happens to those kids when they are exposed these germs a bit later in life? They'll just get sick then. Unless you plan on keeping your kid in solitary confinement, I'd rather my kids build up their immune system when they're young.


"Building up the immune system" sounds like something parents say to make themselves feel better about their kid being sick all the time from daycare.

Do you have proof that something is being "built up" and it's not just a kid getting, well, sick- again and again?

(FTR I sent my babies to daycare full-time. But I tried not to rationalize about how wonderful it was for them)

I definitely don't think it's wonderful when my kids are sick.


I didn't mean that. But why invent "positives" that might not even exist?

DOES it build up the immune system? I'm really asking.


Apparently it does. See, eg, http://www.redorbit.com/news/h.....nity/
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curlgirl




 
 
 
 

Post Mon, Nov 19 2012, 2:40 pm
Thanks, Barbara.

So we know that it might be true for mice ;-)

However, as parents our instinct is usually to prevent our children getting sick.

(Wouldn't we keep our newborn away from a coughing wheezing relative?)

So why the double standard?

It seems like rationalizing to me.
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Tamiri




 
 
 
 

Post Mon, Nov 19 2012, 2:44 pm
Based on my unscientific observation: thinking that exposing young children to viruses and bacteria in a day-care setting strengthens their immune system is bunk. Total shtuyot. It IS what people say because kids today really must go to day care, and no one wants to admit that health-wise, it's not the best thing.
Which isn't to say that the kids grow up to be sickly adults because, (again based on my unscientific observation), all things even out in elementary school anyway.
I DO think that children not being exposed (as in children at home with mom/nanny etc.) stay much healthier during their first years. But that's neither here nor there. It may be that at home you can catch the illness quicker, treat it, put the kid to bed faster - who knows?
The fact is, kids in daycare get sick and they pass it along from one to the other and you have to deal with it. Any reputable day care will immediately make sure an unwell child is sent home. There are criteria.
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sky




 
 
 
 

Post Mon, Nov 19 2012, 3:00 pm
Tamiri wrote:

I DO think that children not being exposed (as in children at home with mom/nanny etc.) stay much healthier during their first years. But that's neither here nor there. It may be that at home you can catch the illness quicker, treat it, put the kid to bed faster - who knows?
The fact is, kids in daycare get sick and they pass it along from one to the other and you have to deal with it. Any reputable day care will immediately make sure an unwell child is sent home. There are criteria.


As soon as one sibling in the house is in school it doesn't help if you keep your baby home. My youngest was home with me until she was 10 months old. Until that date she was on antibiotics over 6 times and was sick with every cold, strep, ear infection that my kids in school must have been exposed to, but didn't even become sick with. She was also exclusively breast fed which didn't seem to help the problem.

I keep my kids home when my dr says they should. Sometimes I think they should maybe stay home, I'll call my dr and if he says they can go I will send them. if he says I have to keep them home until they have a solid BM then they can sometimes stay at home with me for 5+ days until that happens. I do understand how that is very hard for someone who is not a WAHM, SAHM, or doesn't have family in town.
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Raisin




 
 
 
 

Post Mon, Nov 19 2012, 3:07 pm
curlgirl wrote:
Thanks, Barbara.

So we know that it might be true for mice ;-)

However, as parents our instinct is usually to prevent our children getting sick.

(Wouldn't we keep our newborn away from a coughing wheezing relative?)

So why the double standard?

It seems like rationalizing to me.


because a cold in a 3 year old can be very dangerous in a newborn. It can turn to rsv.
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Barbara




 
 
 
 

Post Mon, Nov 19 2012, 3:17 pm
curlgirl wrote:
Thanks, Barbara.

So we know that it might be true for mice ;-)

However, as parents our instinct is usually to prevent our children getting sick.

(Wouldn't we keep our newborn away from a coughing wheezing relative?)

So why the double standard?

It seems like rationalizing to me.


So you weren't really interested in the answer; you were only interested in putting down people who disagree.

And FTR, DS wasn't in daycare, so I'm not rationalizing my own decisions.
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curlgirl




 
 
 
 

Post Mon, Nov 19 2012, 3:30 pm
Raisin wrote:
curlgirl wrote:
Thanks, Barbara.

So we know that it might be true for mice ;-)

However, as parents our instinct is usually to prevent our children getting sick.

(Wouldn't we keep our newborn away from a coughing wheezing relative?)

So why the double standard?

It seems like rationalizing to me.


because a cold in a 3 year old can be very dangerous in a newborn. It can turn to rsv.


And how many babies a few months old are catching colds in daycare and being told, "It's fine, it builds their immune system"?
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curlgirl




 
 
 
 

Post Mon, Nov 19 2012, 3:33 pm
Barbara wrote:
curlgirl wrote:
Thanks, Barbara.

So we know that it might be true for mice ;-)

However, as parents our instinct is usually to prevent our children getting sick.

(Wouldn't we keep our newborn away from a coughing wheezing relative?)

So why the double standard?

It seems like rationalizing to me.


So you weren't really interested in the answer; you were only interested in putting down people who disagree.

And FTR, DS wasn't in daycare, so I'm not rationalizing my own decisions.


"Putting down"? Confused

I want to understand their logic. I want it to be OK for a child to stay home as long as is good for him or her, if possible, without the parents being told they're keeping his immune system undeveloped.
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Barbara




 
 
 
 

Post Mon, Nov 19 2012, 3:37 pm
curlgirl wrote:
Barbara wrote:
curlgirl wrote:
Thanks, Barbara.

So we know that it might be true for mice ;-)

However, as parents our instinct is usually to prevent our children getting sick.

(Wouldn't we keep our newborn away from a coughing wheezing relative?)

So why the double standard?

It seems like rationalizing to me.


So you weren't really interested in the answer; you were only interested in putting down people who disagree.

And FTR, DS wasn't in daycare, so I'm not rationalizing my own decisions.


"Putting down"? Confused

I want to understand their logic. I want it to be OK for a child to stay home as long as is good for him or her, if possible, without the parents being told they're keeping his immune system undeveloped.


You asked if there was a basis for exposing children to germs at an early age in order to build their immune systems. I provided a source. You then rejected the source, without providing any counter information, and stated that it "seems like rationalizing," and that it would be better not to expose the kid.

So, again if you don't care what the scientific community has to say, and just want to tell people that they are merely "rationalizing," why ask for the information?
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curlgirl




 
 
 
 

Post Mon, Nov 19 2012, 3:54 pm
I want to see the people putting forth the ideas supported by said study practicing what they preach and being consistent.
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Raisin




 
 
 
 

Post Mon, Nov 19 2012, 4:01 pm
curlgirl wrote:
Raisin wrote:
curlgirl wrote:
Thanks, Barbara.

So we know that it might be true for mice ;-)

However, as parents our instinct is usually to prevent our children getting sick.

(Wouldn't we keep our newborn away from a coughing wheezing relative?)

So why the double standard?

It seems like rationalizing to me.


because a cold in a 3 year old can be very dangerous in a newborn. It can turn to rsv.


And how many babies a few months old are catching colds in daycare and being told, "It's fine, it builds their immune system"?


newborn in that sense is up to I don't know, 3 months. (until their respiratory systems mature) most mother are on maternity leave for at least a month or so, and many for longer. And yes, you should think twice about sending a tiny newborn to a babysitter with lots of germy kids, but consult your dr if you are not sure.
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shiffycc




 
 
 
 

Post Mon, Nov 19 2012, 4:32 pm
I don't think anyone is talking about sniffles. Having a mild cold is something that most kids have either constantly , or at least intermittently. And no one can or should be expected to keep every one of their children home every time she thinks they might be coming down with something. Obviously, Hashem, for some reason, made it that we are contagious BEFORE we show symptoms.
But I can tell you as a teacher for 2's to 4's for many years, many people DO give their kid tylenol to bring down fever and then send them to gan/daycare. This is inconsiderate of the other parents, of your child, and of the teacher. One time during pregnancy, someone sent their kid to school after she was up in the night vomiting. The next morning I started vomiting. It got so bad that I ended up in the hospital with preterm contractions on iv fluids. aside from the missed work, extra babysitting for the kid,and the $2000 in hospital bills, there was a fear for the life of my baby! Do you think this woman paid my bills? Do you think she even asked mechilla? She really FELT like you don't HAVE to wait 24 hours after they stop vomiting to send them back. Yes, I could have caught it from somone else. And I could have caught it from her before symptoms started, but I would not want that on my head, personally.
I DO know the panic of missing work AGAIN with a sick kid. I live far away from family, my husband cannot take off, I have no one to turn to in such a situation. But they are MY kids, and its MY responsibility to take care of them. I can't send them to school on someone elses cheshbon.
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amother




 

Post Mon, Nov 19 2012, 4:37 pm
When I call up to explain why I am keeping my son home, the school demands I send him even with a fever.
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shiffycc




 
 
 
 

Post Mon, Nov 19 2012, 4:42 pm
amother wrote:
When I call up to explain why I am keeping my son home, the school demands I send him even with a fever.


Don't get it...that's just weird. But whatever, if that's what they WANT you to do, go ahead. Just be happy that you don't need to stay home with them.
OTOH, id want a really good explanation from the school why that's ok....???
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flowerpower




 
 
 
 

Post Mon, Nov 19 2012, 4:44 pm
Honestly, sometimes they go to school feeling fine and it happens once they are there. It happened to my kids already. Kids get sick. Period. Refuah shlaima to your son.
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imabima




 
 
 
 

Post Mon, Nov 19 2012, 8:30 pm
marina wrote:
sweetness, just because you and your husband can figure out how to make ALTERNATE ARRANGEMENTS, doesn't really mean everyone else can.

Some people are single parents and don't have husbands who help us figure things out. Some people don't have the money for a babysitter. For some people, their job is all that's between them and homelessness. Some of us don't have family or friends who are sitting at home waiting to babysit our child. Some of us have children who tell us they are sick five minutes before we leave for day care and we can't be late for work.

Stop judging.

I know, I know, pot calling the kettle black. Well, whatever, Kabel es haEmes miMi sheAmro.


But if your kid is REALLY sick, not just a cold, then you NEED to. It's not about whether it's easy or difficult, or darn near impossible to find other arrangements. It's YOUR PROBLEM! Not the daycare's, the babysitter's, or any one else's. Sending a truly sick child to daycare or school is really not right.
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amother




 

Post Mon, Nov 19 2012, 9:15 pm
I doubt I could find it now, but I remember once reading a study that children get sick a lot the first year they're exposed to other kids a lot, whether they're 1, 2, or 6. That said, I would surely rather not send a newborn to a large group.

As a Bubby I used to watch kids when they were too sick to go to school (I work from home) if they were old enough & well enough to pretty much entertain themselves on my couch. I was happy to help out so the Mommies & Tatties could go about their responsibilities.

But having just been sick for the third time in a few weeks, I am now telling my children: please keep your sick kids at home! Not in my house! Sorry! I am too old for this!

(I am anon because anyone who has spoken to me in the last couple of weeks has heard this from me!)
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EmesOrNT




 
 
 
 

Post Mon, Nov 19 2012, 9:19 pm
My son started playgroup and got a cold within 2 days. He still didn't shake it almost 2 weeks later. It happens.
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MiracleMama




 
 
 
 

Post Mon, Nov 19 2012, 9:43 pm
It's my understanding that people (and this includes little kids) are most contagious BEFORE they develop symptoms. (Furthermore a person can carry and pass on a virus without ever even showing symptoms at all). So even if every parent was incredibly respectful and kept their child home after every cough and sniffle, your child would still be exposed to germs and get sick.

This is a normal part of childhood. It will be much better in a year or two when resistance and immunity is built up.
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amother




 

Post Mon, Nov 19 2012, 9:49 pm
shiffycc wrote:
amother wrote:
When I call up to explain why I am keeping my son home, the school demands I send him even with a fever.


Don't get it...that's just weird. But whatever, if that's what they WANT you to do, go ahead. Just be happy that you don't need to stay home with them.
OTOH, id want a really good explanation from the school wyhy that's ok....???

A boy needs to learn night and day.
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