shoes stay out | Imamother

mandksima

Wed, Oct 09 2013, 1:01 am

I also walk outside barefoot. Granted, we have tile not dirt or grass but I love walking on grass barefoot as well. In this day and age where even very poor people (at least in non 3rd world countries) have some kind of shoes (they can be gotten for next to nothing at thrift stores), what is the importance of wearing shoes all of the time? If walking around shoeless or barefoot is somewhat normal and not a sign of mourning anymore, why does that train of thought continue? Is it just not dignified enough?

amother

Wed, Oct 09 2013, 4:35 am

doublemama wrote:

Honestly, in 12 years I have never had anyone say anything to me (or heard through the grapevine) about any type of embarrassment about the no shoe rule.

When I go to someone else's house I always slip moff my shoes at the door and slip on a slipper type I keep in my handbag.......never heard anything about that either.

Just because you did not hear anything about it doesn't mean people don't find it weird. I don't make faces or say anything when I am asked to remove my shoes either. I HATE it. I also don't gossip about what goes on in other people's homes even when I HATE it.

I wear nylons on my feet. I hate the idea of my feet only having a thin layer to protect them from other people's foot germs. I find it repulsive. I still would never make my host uncomfortable by talking about what goes on in her house.

doublemama

Wed, Oct 09 2013, 4:47 am

If you hate it so much why don't you do something about it to prevent your nylons from touching someone else's foot germs? If I was so sensitive I would carry my own protective footwear in my bag. They sell those little emergency shoe things or a little pair of flip flops or something. They can be placed in a ziploc in your purse and when you need them there they are. In fact I do caery something like that with me and it causes me no problems.

Dirty carpets disgust me more than feet. I hate the way it looks, smells, the message it conveys about my households cleanliness. To tell the truth I don't give two hoots if someone was offended, if you want to be on my carpets the shoes come off, end of story.

doublemama

Wed, Oct 09 2013, 4:56 am

deena19k wrote:

Wow, so many type A people. So some dirt gets on your carpet. Chill.

I saw a documentary years ago I can't even remember what it was called and they tested someone's carpet and it had dog poo, dirt, several strains of some type of bacteria that can make you very sick, and all types a of other nasties. I don't remember all the details but it made an impression on me......very deeply apparently...... Lol. So I see my kids rolling on the carpet, playing, sticking their fingers in their mouths and I just picture that documentary. I know you can't be 100% protected from everything that will make you sick but and ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure, right?

seeker

Wed, Oct 09 2013, 7:16 am

Hm when I saw "dirty feet" in household management I thought it would be someone with my problem - that everyone's feet are getting dirty all the time, does that mean it's time to wash my floors again? embarrassed

doublemama

Wed, Oct 09 2013, 8:48 am

I also don't like some of the rules other people have in their homes but its their homes, their rules and I respect that. I have a friend who makes everyone wash their hands as soon as they enter her home...annoying, yes but her house her rules.

doublemama

Wed, Oct 09 2013, 9:21 am

Why? Your rules can be whatever you want them to be. Just because something is common doesn't make it right for your family and the other way is true as well. Just because you desire something to be done a certain way in your home and you don't know anyone else who does it doesn't make it wrong.

I don't let people smoke in my house either. If people don't like to take off their shoes when they come to my door they don't have to come or they can be banned to the kitchen. If they don't like it they don't have to come. Since I have many guests I don't think anyone cares, and if they do it isn't very much because they keep coming back!

doublemama

Wed, Oct 09 2013, 9:40 am

That's fine, you don't have to like it. I believe filthy carpets are also a health hazard. When I was growing up no one stepped on a carpet with outdoor shoes on. It just wasn't done, by anyone. I am going to out myself by saying this but I grew up Amish and no one, absolutely no one walked into the house without either washing their feet or swapping outdoor shoes for indoor ones. All visitors, all family, even the dog got her paws cleaned before coming in. Maybe my history (coupled with that documentary) is what is shaping my views. I am truly shocked that it is even an issue.

elf123

Wed, Oct 09 2013, 9:46 am

I am a bit surprised by the fact that only 2 posters mentioned the idea that going barefoot is a sign of aveilus...this is something that has been ingrained in me since childhood. There are obviously compromises, like having slippers at the door, or whatever one is comfortable with/can afford, but here's another question: Do all of you who insist on being shoeless make brachos/daven without shoes? Did nobody else learn that this is an issue?

sequoia

Wed, Oct 09 2013, 9:48 am

I hate shoes, hate even thinking about them. They come off as soon as I'm home.

I don't usually ask my guests to take off their shoes, although some do anyway.

But I don't like being barefoot or in socks either Smile

Slippers are the best.

sequoia

Wed, Oct 09 2013, 9:50 am

elf123 wrote:

Given that in some cultures no one EVER wears shoes in the house, do you really think this is a universal issue?

amother

Wed, Oct 09 2013, 10:06 am

sequoia wrote:

elf123 wrote:

Given that in some cultures no one EVER wears shoes in the house, do you really think this is a universal issue?

We're not talking culture we're talking about a halachic inyan not to go around barefoot or in socks.
I had to sit shiva as a child and since then I never wear socks in the house. Never learnt that about barefoot though, just socks. OTOH of course it would never occur to me to make a bracha or perform any other ritual or come to the Shabbat table to hear kiddush etc. barefoot though I would in slippers.

mandksima

Wed, Oct 09 2013, 2:40 pm

This got me thinking about barefoot times and it reminded me of birkat kohanim so I looked this up:

Samson Raphael Hirsch says in his commentary on Exodus (Isaac Levy’s translation, 1956, pages 25-26): “Taking off one’s shoes expresses giving oneself up entirely to the meaning of a place, to let your personality get its standing and take up its position entirely and directly on it without any intermediary. So the kohanim in the Mikdash had always to function barefooted, and nothing was allowed to intervene between their feet and the ground, or between their hands and the holy vessels used during the avodah, or between the priestly garments and the body… If one wished to act in the service of the Mikdash, one had to identify oneself directly with it, and become sanctified by it and be a part of it”.

Why would being barefoot be like being in mourning? The kohanim in the Beit Hamikdash couldn't even wear socks. It wasn't considered undignified or in bad taste.

Our rav doesn't require us to wear socks so I don't see a halachic issue in wearing them. The kohanim said brachot barefoot so how can it be halacha? I think it just isn't done in certain communities.

mandksima

Thu, Oct 10 2013, 4:44 am

Ruchel wrote:

People come before floors.
Unless maybe you live in a historic place.

I used to live in a historic home (140+ years old) and still never heard of asking people to take off shoes unless they were muddy and then people would do it without needing to be asked. I would never have slippers for others to use, that is so weird to me. There were no carpets there though, except for one area carpet in the living room, just all really old and beautiful wood floors which don't show dirt like tile or light colored carpet. Even though our house was like a museum, I would never treat it as such and forbid children in the formal room or whatever. Houses are meant to be lived in and feel comfortable IMO and a little germs from outside never killed anyone. There is a certain level of bacteria that is beneficial to have around for your immune system to grow strong. If you santized your house like a hospital, I would think people would get sick more. Who knows? Maybe I don't get it, I am not a cleaning freak at all.