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Question for mothers of Lakewood high school girls
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amother




Cobalt


Post  Wed, Jun 05 2019, 1:31 am
amother [ Sienna ] wrote:
So...my daughter got accepted to Bnos Bais Yaakov. She's a very good girl with excellent grades but I'm new in town and have no connections or money so I think trying for another school is utterly pointless. I've heard they were trying to "recreate" BBY but sadly it seems it still doesn't have the best name. Would you know if they had any success at all in bettering the school? Why does it have the reputation it does? Any info you (or anyone) can give me would be very helpful. You can do it privately if you don't feel comfortable doing it here but I personally feel it should be done publicly to help inform people. Many thanks!


BBY is a great school! It only has a bad reputation because some people in Lakewood can be stupid. It's not a super yeshivish parent body like Bais Shaindel, but it is a nice crowd.

I know a post sem girl from Shiras Dvorah who taught extra curricular for a while there and is obsessed with the school and can't stop raving how yummy it is and what a breath of fresh air it is from your typical large very Lakewoody schools.
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amother




Sienna


Post  Wed, Jun 05 2019, 1:46 am
amother [ Cobalt ] wrote:
BBY is a great school! It only has a bad reputation because some people in Lakewood can be stupid. It's not a super yeshivish parent body like Bais Shaindel, but it is a nice crowd.

I know a post sem girl from Shiras Dvorah who taught extra curricular for a while there and is obsessed with the school and can't stop raving how yummy it is and what a breath of fresh air it is from your typical large very Lakewoody schools.


Wow, thank you so much. That's amazing to hear. You made me feel so much better!
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Emotional




 
 
 


Post  Wed, Jun 05 2019, 7:30 am
amother [ Sienna ] wrote:
So...my daughter got accepted to Bnos Bais Yaakov. She's a very good girl with excellent grades but I'm new in town and have no connections or money so I think trying for another school is utterly pointless. I've heard they were trying to "recreate" BBY but sadly it seems it still doesn't have the best name. Would you know if they had any success at all in bettering the school? Why does it have the reputation it does? Any info you (or anyone) can give me would be very helpful. You can do it privately if you don't feel comfortable doing it here but I personally feel it should be done publicly to help inform people. Many thanks!

I do believe the school is on its way up. I know three very frum, upstanding families whp send there. Another family I know, their daughter was not accepted to BBY and they are devastated.
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amother




Lemon


Post  Wed, Jun 05 2019, 7:37 am
Does anyone have experience with being placed in a school and not giving an answer right away. I don’t mean waiting a few months, I mean waiting a few days or a week to confirm that none of the schools my daughter applied to have slots opening...
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amother




Cerise


Post  Wed, Jun 05 2019, 8:04 am
amother [ Cobalt ] wrote:
BBY is a great school! It only has a bad reputation because some people in Lakewood can be stupid. It's not a super yeshivish parent body like Bais Shaindel, but it is a nice crowd.

I know a post sem girl from Shiras Dvorah who taught extra curricular for a while there and is obsessed with the school and can't stop raving how yummy it is and what a breath of fresh air it is from your typical large very Lakewoody schools.


Would you send your own daughter to bby?

Amother if you want thentruth then you
Better ask people in real life why they are or aren’t happy here everyone is going to aaya amazing things because it’s yenim going and why should we say lashon hara?

Also what type of person is your daughter? Definitely it’s a more open minded kind of clientele who sends there.

I only know one person who goes there who is miserable and said that the principal just makes up new rules every day and doesn’t let the girls breathe she is down their back. I don’t know the school besides for this person sonit could be an amazing school I’m not saying to trust me, all I’m saying is the school has a bad name so research it. Is thwnname legit?

Honestly no one on here knows you or your daughter so no one is going to say lashon hara about the school and I don’t think it’s even allowed to write lashon hara. Either call the school and ask for ten girls that already go to the school or find one mother who sends there and ask her who to call.

But don’t go in. Blindly and don’t be afraid to ask as many people as you need
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amother




Cerise


Post  Wed, Jun 05 2019, 8:07 am
amother [ Lemon ] wrote:
Does anyone have experience with being placed in a school and not giving an answer right away. I don’t mean waiting a few months, I mean waiting a few days or a week to confirm that none of the schools my daughter applied to have slots opening...



This is the first year that girls were places without applying to that school.

Again no schools give out second answers until answers from parents were given and no school will accept you as long as you
Have a yes from a different school.

If you want to get in to another school then reject rhe school that you didn’t even apply to.
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amother




Lemon


Post  Wed, Jun 05 2019, 8:27 am
amother [ Cerise ] wrote:
This is the first year that girls were places without applying to that school.

Again no schools give out second answers until answers from parents were given and no school will accept you as long as you
Have a yes from a different school.

If you want to get in to another school then reject rhe school that you didn’t even apply to.


Right but what happens if the other schools don’t accept her. Then I might need to go back to the placed school even though this is far from what we wanted. There are girls that didn’t get into school till Chanuka. I can’t do that to her.
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amother




Cerise


Post  Wed, Jun 05 2019, 8:42 am
amother [ Lemon ] wrote:
Right but what happens if the other schools don’t accept her. Then I might need to go back to the placed school even though this is far from what we wanted. There are girls that didn’t get into school till Chanuka. I can’t do that to her.


Honestly the school she was placed in is either bby or yesodos I’m sure come August theybwould still take her. And if they don’t it’s netter for you because then the vaad is forced to help you because she won’t have a school then once you reject then.

Girls that were out of school until chanuka had a school to go to they just chose not to go to those school.
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amother




Bronze


Post  Wed, Jun 05 2019, 8:46 am
amother [ Cerise ] wrote:
Honestly the school she was placed in is either bby or yesodos I’m sure come August theybwould still take her. And if they don’t it’s netter for you because then the vaad is forced to help you because she won’t have a school then once you reject then.

Girls that were out of school until chanuka had a school to go to they just chose not to go to those school.

I personally know a girl that was out until Chanukah and was not offered any school to go to
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amother




Lemon


Post  Wed, Jun 05 2019, 8:49 am
amother [ Cerise ] wrote:
Honestly the school she was placed in is either bby or yesodos I’m sure come August theybwould still take her. And if they don’t it’s netter for you because then the vaad is forced to help you because she won’t have a school then once you reject then.

Girls that were out of school until chanuka had a school to go to they just chose not to go to those school.


The vaad is forced to help you if they placed you in a school that accepted you and you said no? I’m not so sure.

Unfortunately I did hear of a girl who got into BBY, rejected it because she thought she would find something better. By the time she was desperate enough, BBY wouldn’t look at her. She was out of school till she was placed in another school around Chanukah.
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amother




Cobalt


Post  Wed, Jun 05 2019, 8:52 am
amother [ Cerise ] wrote:
Would you send your own daughter to bby?

Amother if you want thentruth then you
Better ask people in real life why they are or aren’t happy here everyone is going to aaya amazing things because it’s yenim going and why should we say lashon hara?

Also what type of person is your daughter? Definitely it’s a more open minded kind of clientele who sends there.

I only know one person who goes there who is miserable and said that the principal just makes up new rules every day and doesn’t let the girls breathe she is down their back. I don’t know the school besides for this person sonit could be an amazing school I’m not saying to trust me, all I’m saying is the school has a bad name so research it. Is thwnname legit?

Honestly no one on here knows you or your daughter so no one is going to say lashon hara about the school and I don’t think it’s even allowed to write lashon hara. Either call the school and ask for ten girls that already go to the school or find one mother who sends there and ask her who to call.

But don’t go in. Blindly and don’t be afraid to ask as many people as you need


Yes. I have 2 dds in BBY and 2 that graduated.

All Lakewood schools have rules that can potentially be stifling if you're not the type that likes to conform.
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Emotional




 
 
 


Post  Wed, Jun 05 2019, 8:52 am
amother [ Cerise ] wrote:
Would you send your own daughter to bby?

I would not hesitate to send my daughter BBY.
When we were applying to high school, I wasn't familiar with that school, and BH my daughter was accepted to Bais Kaila.
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Notsobusy




 
 
 


Post  Wed, Jun 05 2019, 9:02 am
amother [ Cobalt ] wrote:
BBY is a great school! It only has a bad reputation because some people in Lakewood can be stupid. It's not a super yeshivish parent body like Bais Shaindel, but it is a nice crowd.

I know a post sem girl from Shiras Dvorah who taught extra curricular for a while there and is obsessed with the school and can't stop raving how yummy it is and what a breath of fresh air it is from your typical large very Lakewoody schools.


Edited thanks to amother Cobalt, you know who you are!

From the people I know who went to BBY, some were happy and some weren't.

Amother Sienna, please ask people you know irl, who you trust to give you good advice. This is something too important to trust the advice of an anonymous woman on the internet, including me!


Last edited by Notsobusy on Wed, Jun 05 2019, 9:30 pm; edited 2 times in total
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Notsobusy




 
 
 


Post  Wed, Jun 05 2019, 9:06 am
amother [ Cerise ] wrote:
This is the first year that girls were places without applying to that school.

Again no schools give out second answers until answers from parents were given and no school will accept you as long as you
Have a yes from a different school.

If you want to get in to another school then reject rhe school that you didn’t even apply to.


Girls have been placed in schools they didn't apply to for a few years now. And rejecting a school you don't want is very risky, because the vaad will not help you once you got an acceptance and didn't take it.

This is such a horrible situation and I feel terrible for all of you who are stuck in it. I don't understand why they can't figure out a better solution.
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amother




Cerise


Post  Wed, Jun 05 2019, 9:09 am
Research as in choosing a school for your daughter has to be irl. You can’t rely on an anonymous poster. How do you know if the person answering you isn’t financially affiliated with the school you are inquiring about.

Please to everyone do your due diligence before making a decision and don’t rely on anonymous posting
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amother




Coffee


Post  Wed, Jun 05 2019, 9:26 am
Im young and dont have big girls yet- but let this be a chizuk to all of u - I went to bais kaila and I had/have 4 sisters in oros. There is NO perfect school.
I had a girl working for me this past year who was in BBY 12th grade. She was so inspiring. Frum, fun, full of life and best off all had an amazing attitude.
Good attitude was definitely missing my from H.S experience but maybe it was just me ...
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amother




Lemon


Post  Wed, Jun 05 2019, 9:29 am
I’ve heard okaybthings about BBY. One of my biggest concerns which might reflect the different opinions is the morale of the girls there. If 80% of girls are being placed there against their will I cannot imagine it being a positive environment.
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amother




Lemon


Post  Wed, Jun 05 2019, 9:32 am
Notsobusy wrote:
Girls have been placed in schools they didn't apply to for a few years now. And rejecting a school you don't want is very risky, because the vaad will not help you once you got an acceptance and didn't take it.


This is my question. How long can I stall the school we were placed in until I’m fully confident that we tried everything that we could to get her into a school we applied to.
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amother




Purple


Post  Wed, Jun 05 2019, 9:39 am
amother [ Coffee ] wrote:

Good attitude was definitely missing my from H.S experience but maybe it was just me ...

Look it's very hard to generalize... since being in Bais Kaila my daughter has come to life in ways I could never have imagined.
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amother




Cobalt


Post  Wed, Jun 05 2019, 10:06 am
amother [ Lemon ] wrote:
I’ve heard okaybthings about BBY. One of my biggest concerns which might reflect the different opinions is the morale of the girls there. If 80% of girls are being placed there against their will I cannot imagine it being a positive environment.


It's a very happy and warm environment. OTOH, I can't imagine a super large school having the same level of warmth and coziness.
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