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DrMom




 
 
 


Post  Sun, Sep 01 2019, 7:56 am
barbara1 wrote:
My daughter is a very high academic achiever and currently at Bnos Bais Yaakov in Lakewood, we are a frum regular background not modern but my daughter is not Yeshvish and Bnos bais Yaakov threw out half off the school this year (any girls that are not the typical Lakewood girl were thrown out) I am desperately looking for a good out of town school. Any leads would be greatly appreciated. Anybody have the Contact info to the principal at Reenas Bias yaakov her name is Mrs Chaya Edelman?. Anybody Familiar with Bais Yaakov of Miami as my daughter has some close friends in Miami and would love to go there but finding a boarding family has been very difficult and the schools told me that without a solid boarding family they wont be able to take her.

Are *all* BY schools purging their student body of girls from non-yeshivish backgrounds?

Or is it just this particular BY school in Lakewood?

And they did this close to the start of the schoolyear?
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simcha2




 
 
 


Post  Sun, Sep 01 2019, 8:12 am
Emotional wrote:
Is that an elementary school? Where are they located?


Elementary in piscataway (though they are planning on moving to highland park/ Edison)
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amother




Rose


Post  Sun, Sep 01 2019, 8:32 am
hugs and hatzlocha
maybe you will get more responses with a different title thread like "looking for boarding family in miami for BY high school girl"
hope it works out for you and your daughter
also- if she knows girls there id call their parents and ask around and have them ask around/give leads too
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amother




cornflower


Post  Sun, Sep 01 2019, 9:36 am
whats this new school ashira bais yaakov? I cant seem to find it in the voice... whos the new principal?
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amother




Aquamarine


Post  Sun, Sep 01 2019, 10:13 am
amother [ cornflower ] wrote:
whats this new school ashira bais yaakov? I cant seem to find it in the voice... whos the new principal?


I'm not sure if they have a principal. They had an ad on The Lakewood Scoops instagram a few weeks ago. They are only having 11th grade so far.
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kenz




 
 
 


Post  Sun, Sep 01 2019, 10:55 am
OP, I gather you feel your DD would prefer out of town, but there are several schools in Brooklyn and the Five Towns/Queens to choose from and might be much easier for your DD to get into at least some of them. It's worth thinking about. It's also much closer to you and probably easier to find boarding since the communities are so large.
Just as examples - Lev Bais Yaakov, Prospect Park Yeshivah, TAG, Shevach.
Hatzlachah - I can only imagine how difficult this is.
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JoyInTheMorning




 
 
 


Post  Sun, Sep 01 2019, 11:28 am
The more I read these threads, the more I scratch my head. What school in its right mind would kick out a large bunch of students right before the school year? How does that make financial sense? There's a tremendous loss of revenue and even if they can fire some teachers (which is not always possible), there are some fixed costs like building and maintenance that do not decrease as the student body decreases.

So the only possibility that I can think of is that there are some rich parents who have such sinas chinam toward the "not Lakewood enough" girls (whatever that means) that they are willing to fork over huge sums of money to make up for the financial shortfall.

Whether or not my hypothesis is correct, this whole situation is truly disgusting. I hate to say this on Rosh Chodesh Elul, but this makes me so angry -- as well as sad for all of us that this is happening among frum Jews.
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naturalmom5




 
 
 


Post  Sun, Sep 01 2019, 2:56 pm
amother [ cornflower ] wrote:
whats this new school ashira bais yaakov? I cant seem to find it in the voice... whos the new principal?

Look in the coffee room letters
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amother




Sapphire


Post  Sun, Sep 01 2019, 7:42 pm
JoyInTheMorning wrote:
The more I read these threads, the more I scratch my head. What school in its right mind would kick out a large bunch of students right before the school year? How does that make financial sense? There's a tremendous loss of revenue and even if they can fire some teachers (which is not always possible), there are some fixed costs like building and maintenance that do not decrease as the student body decreases.

So the only possibility that I can think of is that there are some rich parents who have such sinas chinam toward the "not Lakewood enough" girls (whatever that means) that they are willing to fork over huge sums of money to make up for the financial shortfall.

Whether or not my hypothesis is correct, this whole situation is truly disgusting. I hate to say this on Rosh Chodesh Elul, but this makes me so angry -- as well as sad for all of us that this is happening among frum Jews.


Way to make assumptions and jump to the wrong conclusions!

I'm a BBY mother who is NOT AT ALL yeshivish or Lakewood type - yet somehow my daughter wasn't kicked out. How can that be? Simple. The girls who were asked to leave were - in plain English - bummy. That's the reason they were kicked out. In addition to that, they flouted the school rules. I saw this myself all the time. They also disrupted the class so much that my daughter would complain to me that she's not learning anything because the teachers can't teach. The girls would flat out ignore the teachers.

So for the person who said how "unfair" the school is for kicking out these girls, is it fair to my daughter and the rest of the decent girls to go to school every day and not learn anything because of these girls? Is it fair that they should be exposed to underage drinking and inappropriate conversations? Because that's what these girls were doing - among other things.

To set the record straight, it wasn't half the school, not even close. I heard it's 5 girls from my daughter's grade of 60, though I don't know for sure if that's the correct number and whether there were more girls from other grades or not. They didn't even indiscriminately throw out every problematic girl. I know of a few that they kept that are somewhat problematic that they think they can still help. And no they didn't do it the last minute. I happened to hear about this a few weeks into July. By then the girls had already been asked to leave - I have no idea how long before that it was actually done. It might have been right after the school year or at most, a few weeks later. Also, the school didn't take this lightly and did it under the guidance of rabbonim.

What should truly make you sad here is that the only "hypothesis" you could manage to think of is rich parents with sinas chinam paying off the school. You could just as easily have thought that maybe the school is just doing the right thing - even if it means a financial loss for them. I know I complained to the school a few times but I'm definitely not paying them off. I get a tuition break on top of my tuition break.

Yet another "hypothesis" you could have thought of - if altruistic reasons were too much of a stretch for you - was that the school was indeed self serving. Maybe they decided that they stand to make more money long term if they have a good school with a good reputation - even if they have to take a short term loss this year. Maybe it was a combination of reasons. Either way, they did the right thing in the right way and I thank them for it.
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barbara1




 
 
 


Post  Sun, Sep 01 2019, 8:15 pm
amother [ Sapphire ] wrote:
Way to make assumptions and jump to the wrong conclusions!

I'm a BBY mother who is NOT AT ALL yeshivish or Lakewood type - yet somehow my daughter wasn't kicked out. How can that be? Simple. The girls who were asked to leave were - in plain English - bummy. That's the reason they were kicked out. In addition to that, they flouted the school rules. I saw this myself all the time. They also disrupted the class so much that my daughter would complain to me that she's not learning anything because the teachers can't teach. The girls would flat out ignore the teachers.

So for the person who said how "unfair" the school is for kicking out these girls, is it fair to my daughter and the rest of the decent girls to go to school every day and not learn anything because of these girls? Is it fair that they should be exposed to underage drinking and inappropriate conversations? Because that's what these girls were doing - among other things.

To set the record straight, it wasn't half the school, not even close. I heard it's 5 girls from my daughter's grade of 60, though I don't know for sure if that's the correct number and whether there were more girls from other grades or not. They didn't even indiscriminately throw out every problematic girl. I know of a few that they kept that are somewhat problematic that they think they can still help. And no they didn't do it the last minute. I happened to hear about this a few weeks into July. By then the girls had already been asked to leave - I have no idea how long before that it was actually done. It might have been right after the school year or at most, a few weeks later. Also, the school didn't take this lightly and did it under the guidance of rabbonim.

What should truly make you sad here is that the only "hypothesis" you could manage to think of is rich parents with sinas chinam paying off the school. You could just as easily have thought that maybe the school is just doing the right thing - even if it means a financial loss for them. I know I complained to the school a few times but I'm definitely not paying them off. I get a tuition break on top of my tuition break.

Yet another "hypothesis" you could have thought of - if altruistic reasons were too much of a stretch for you - was that the school was indeed self serving. Maybe they decided that they stand to make more money long term if they have a good school with a good reputation - even if they have to take a short term loss this year. Maybe it was a combination of reasons. Either way, they did the right thing in the right way and I thank them for it.



First what ur saying that it wasn't half of the school is untrue ,secondly allot of girls were thrown out for minor infractions and they were not drinking etc ,I am sure if your own daughter would have been expelled you would have been singing a whole different song and would expect the school to give her another chance, like rabbi wallerstien said at one of his lectures "that a school has a right to expel students only if they treat the studants like their own children otherwise they will all burn in the deepest gehenim".
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barbara1




 
 
 


Post  Sun, Sep 01 2019, 8:27 pm
amother [ Sapphire ] wrote:
Way to make assumptions and jump to the wrong conclusions!

I'm a BBY mother who is NOT AT ALL yeshivish or Lakewood type - yet somehow my daughter wasn't kicked out. How can that be? Simple. The girls who were asked to leave were - in plain English - bummy. That's the reason they were kicked out. In addition to that, they flouted the school rules. I saw this myself all the time. They also disrupted the class so much that my daughter would complain to me that she's not learning anything because the teachers can't teach. The girls would flat out ignore the teachers.

So for the person who said how "unfair" the school is for kicking out these girls, is it fair to my daughter and the rest of the decent girls to go to school every day and not learn anything because of these girls? Is it fair that they should be exposed to underage drinking and inappropriate conversations? Because that's what these girls were doing - among other things.

To set the record straight, it wasn't half the school, not even close. I heard it's 5 girls from my daughter's grade of 60, though I don't know for sure if that's the correct number and whether there were more girls from other grades or not. They didn't even indiscriminately throw out every problematic girl. I know of a few that they kept that are somewhat problematic that they think they can still help. And no they didn't do it the last minute. I happened to hear about this a few weeks into July. By then the girls had already been asked to leave - I have no idea how long before that it was actually done. It might have been right after the school year or at most, a few weeks later. Also, the school didn't take this lightly and did it under the guidance of rabbonim.

What should truly make you sad here is that the only "hypothesis" you could manage to think of is rich parents with sinas chinam paying off the school. You could just as easily have thought that maybe the school is just doing the right thing - even if it means a financial loss for them. I know I complained to the school a few times but I'm definitely not paying them off. I get a tuition break on top of my tuition break.

Yet another "hypothesis" you could have thought of - if altruistic reasons were too much of a stretch for you - was that the school was indeed self serving. Maybe they decided that they stand to make more money long term if they have a good school with a good reputation - even if they have to take a short term loss this year. Maybe it was a combination of reasons. Either way, they did the right thing in the right way and I thank them for it.



"Guidance of rabbanim" what are you talking about non of the rabannim I know allow a school just to throw out girsl onto the street without hearing the parents side under a normal bes din your supposed to listen to both sides of the story and not one sided story from the school that's not allowed in our religion,I think parents like you that are just judgemental and have no idea what they are talking about are the biggest problem and not the students.
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Sebastian




 
 
 


Post  Sun, Sep 01 2019, 8:48 pm
amother [ Sapphire ] wrote:


What should truly make you sad here is that the only "hypothesis" you could manage to think of is rich parents with sinas chinam paying off the school. You could just as easily have thought that maybe the school is just doing the right thing - even if it means a financial loss for them. I know I complained to the school a few times but I'm definitely not paying them off. I get a tuition break on top of my tuition break.

Yet another "hypothesis" you could have thought of - if altruistic reasons were too much of a stretch for you - was that the school was indeed self serving. Maybe they decided that they stand to make more money long term if they have a good school with a good reputation - even if they have to take a short term loss this year. Maybe it was a combination of reasons. Either way, they did the right thing in the right way and I thank them for it.


you are a nasty nasty piece of work. you don't even have a drop of compassion for op.

you obviously have no idea how hard it is to have your child thrown out of school with nowhere to go while other children are buying supplies and getting ready for school. I don't care how awful these girls are (and I don't believe for a minute that they are as horrible as you say), they're mere teens and don't deserve that shame.

You are right though they threw girls out so they can have a "good reputation". Because reputation matters more to them than these girls' lives. The fact that they did that and have a nasty parent like you in their parent body says all anyone needs to know about the school.

OP, Bruriah is a fantastic school. b"h you will look back and say b"h she was "asked" to leave. May you have a lot of nachas from her and your other children.
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amother




Ginger


Post  Sun, Sep 01 2019, 9:03 pm
kenz wrote:
OP, I gather you feel your DD would prefer out of town, but there are several schools in Brooklyn and the Five Towns/Queens to choose from and might be much easier for your DD to get into at least some of them. It's worth thinking about. It's also much closer to you and probably easier to find boarding since the communities are so large.
Just as examples - Lev Bais Yaakov, Prospect Park Yeshivah, TAG, Shevach.
Hatzlachah - I can only imagine how difficult this is.

Don't know about 5 towns/queens schools, but Brooklyn high schools aren't easy to get into
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barbara1




 
 
 


Post  Sun, Sep 01 2019, 9:19 pm
Sebastian wrote:
you are a nasty nasty piece of work. you don't even have a drop of compassion for op.

you obviously have no idea how hard it is to have your child thrown out of school with nowhere to go while other children are buying supplies and getting ready for school. I don't care how awful these girls are (and I don't believe for a minute that they are as horrible as you say), they're mere teens and don't deserve that shame.

You are right though they threw girls out so they can have a "good reputation". Because reputation matters more to them than these girls' lives. The fact that they did that and have a nasty parent like you in their parent body says all anyone needs to know about the school.

OP, Bruriah is a fantastic school. b"h you will look back and say b"h she was "asked" to leave. May you have a lot of nachas from her and your other children.



I agree 100% with you ,that's the sick part that reputation is more important than children's life's.
This woman has no compassionol only to her own offsprings she can't relate to someone else's pain and suffering.
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kenz




 
 
 


Post  Sun, Sep 01 2019, 10:27 pm
amother [ Ginger ] wrote:
Don't know about 5 towns/queens schools, but Brooklyn high schools aren't easy to get into


Depends when - at this point if there were some last-minute openings then the schools generally want those spots filled and are much easier to get into than during the regular application season.
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amother




Aquamarine


Post  Sun, Sep 01 2019, 10:28 pm
Sebastian wrote:
you are a nasty nasty piece of work. you don't even have a drop of compassion for op.

you obviously have no idea how hard it is to have your child thrown out of school with nowhere to go while other children are buying supplies and getting ready for school. I don't care how awful these girls are (and I don't believe for a minute that they are as horrible as you say), they're mere teens and don't deserve that shame.

You are right though they threw girls out so they can have a "good reputation". Because reputation matters more to them than these girls' lives. The fact that they did that and have a nasty parent like you in their parent body says all anyone needs to know about the school.

OP, Bruriah is a fantastic school. b"h you will look back and say b"h she was "asked" to leave. May you have a lot of nachas from her and your other children.


So true. My dd is in a different Lakewood high school and it's not working out well. But they are doing everything they can not to kick her out and not to make her feel unwanted, even though by now it's obvious that she doesn't belong there anymore.
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barbara1




 
 
 


Post  Sun, Sep 01 2019, 10:35 pm
amother [ Aquamarine ] wrote:
So true. My dd is in a different Lakewood high school and it's not working out well. But they are doing everything they can not to kick her out and not to make her feel unwanted, even though by now it's obvious that she doesn't belong there anymore.


I know rabbi kineric from bais shaindel and bais rifka rochel and many other schools will never throw out anyone as he is a person with a big heart
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sarahmalka




 
 
 


Post  Sun, Sep 01 2019, 11:56 pm
mamaleh wrote:
Just btw, Reenas has a very strict policy that they don’t take Lakewood girls.

At least two posters mention that certain schools don't take Lakewood girls. Could someone explain this to me?
Signed,
Small town imamother baffled by blanket exclusionary policies
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barbara1




 
 
 


Post  Mon, Sep 02 2019, 12:23 am
sarahmalka wrote:
At least two posters mention that certain schools don't take Lakewood girls. Could someone explain this to me?
Signed,
Small town imamother baffled by blanket exclusionary policies


It means that they want to keep their business model intact and if they believe that someone different or challenging will ruin their brand then they won't take that student as they are not there to help Jewish children they are there to make a profit it's just a regular business.
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byisrael




 
 
 


Post  Mon, Sep 02 2019, 2:00 am
barbara1 wrote:
It means that they want to keep their business model intact and if they believe that someone different or challenging will ruin their brand then they won't take that student as they are not there to help Jewish children they are there to make a profit it's just a regular business.


Op I know your struggeling to find your dd a place and thats really tough. Please don't use your pain to malign schools and people that you don't know much about (otherwhise you wouldn't make such a statement).
Reenas BY in edison was opened to serve the YST graduates that wanted a Bais Yaakov so they would not have to travel (before that YST girls who wanted a Bais Yaakov had to dorm in Brooklyn because LAKEWOOD SCHOOLS wouldn't accept them.
Reenas had bunch of really bad experiance with girls from LKWD (if a lakewood girl went to YST the do accept them).
This is a community school supported by a certain individual in the community - and every year they get tonz of applicants from LKWD who don't fit the typical LKWD mold. If they would take them the school would be able to serve the population it was opened for - the community.
They are not running away from differnt or challenging - they are saying that we serve our community no matter how difficult and challenging but we wil not take all of a different cities challenges and hurt our own community in the process.

LKWD needs to solve LKWD problems - to open schools that cater to different types IN LKWD. You can't expect small OOT communities that happen to be in driving distance to take all of LKWD students who aren't a perfect fit. There are to many - it's to much.
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