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Anyone leave Brooklyn and regret the move?
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amother




Periwinkle
 

Post  Tue, Oct 29 2019, 4:43 pm
amother [ Goldenrod ] wrote:
Can people who miss Brooklyn answer instead of the opposite? I asked about Toms River and I got mostly the people who were happy there .


Why would you want to hear half the story? If only people who left bklyn and regretted it responded in this thread, we'd get a few responses but we wouldn't learn that the overwhelming majority of people who leave bklyn are glad they did.
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amother




Honeydew
 

Post  Tue, Oct 29 2019, 4:49 pm
I'm still not sure...

We moved OOT about a year and a half ago. Housing, parking, backyard, kids friends - so much easier. But I feel so so far away. The trip in is major and you miss all the small simchas. Salaries are lower (but lower cost of living) and there are less opportunities. Really depends on your specific situation. Jobs, family, housing options, etc.
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amother




Copper
 

Post  Wed, Oct 30 2019, 12:53 am
I wish I could leave Brooklyn but I can't because dh is disabled and relies on public transportation.
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amother




Powderblue
 

Post  Wed, Oct 30 2019, 8:32 am
Can't speak to Brooklyn specifically as I've never lived there, but I grew up in a different borough, and lived there until a few years after I got married, and I've had a VERY hard time adjusting to the suburbs. I hate driving and having to drive everywhere stinks. I hate having a lawn, it's just extra work. I hate having a big house, it's also more work. It's too quiet for me. My kids are still young, but my oldest is almost at the age I was when I started going places by myself, and he won't be able to do that because he's still nowhere near old enough to drive. I'm gonna have to schlep kids around until they're older teens (and see point about how much I hate driving). So yeah, I regret it. Alas, we simply couldn't afford to stay in the city, so there's nothing to be done about it.
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yo'ma




 
 
 
 

Post  Wed, Oct 30 2019, 9:11 am
I was born and bred in Brooklyn. I moved away and regret it, but nothing to do with Brooklyn. I just don't like where I am now. Pretty much all the good and bad things about Brooklyn, we have here too, like conveniences (good), no space (bad), but tenfold, at least the bad stuff. When, NOT IF, I move back, I don't want to move to Brooklyn though. I like my space so I would like to live somewhere where my neighbor would be a half mile away or something. Wishful thinking!! Don't know which part though Confused .
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amother




Salmon
 

Post  Wed, Oct 30 2019, 9:21 am
yo'ma wrote:
I was born and bred in Brooklyn. I moved away and regret it, but nothing to do with Brooklyn. I just don't like where I am now. Pretty much all the good and bad things about Brooklyn, we have here too, like conveniences (good), no space (bad), but tenfold, at least the bad stuff. When, NOT IF, I move back, I don't want to move to Brooklyn though. I like my space so I would like to live somewhere where my neighbor would be a half mile away or something. Wishful thinking!! Don't know which part though Confused .


Where do you live?
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amother




Salmon
 

Post  Wed, Oct 30 2019, 9:22 am
amother [ Honeydew ] wrote:
I'm still not sure...

We moved OOT about a year and a half ago. Housing, parking, backyard, kids friends - so much easier. But I feel so so far away. The trip in is major and you miss all the small simchas. Salaries are lower (but lower cost of living) and there are less opportunities. Really depends on your specific situation. Jobs, family, housing options, etc.


This is the primary reason that I am afraid to pull the trigger and move OOT.

I didn't even think of missing the smaller simchos, just being far away in general.
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yo'ma




 
 
 
 

Post  Wed, Oct 30 2019, 9:25 am
amother [ Salmon ] wrote:
Where do you live?

Argentina
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amother




Dodgerblue
 

Post  Wed, Oct 30 2019, 11:24 am
amother [ Powderblue ] wrote:
Can't speak to Brooklyn specifically as I've never lived there, but I grew up in a different borough, and lived there until a few years after I got married, and I've had a VERY hard time adjusting to the suburbs. I hate driving and having to drive everywhere stinks. I hate having a lawn, it's just extra work. I hate having a big house, it's also more work. It's too quiet for me. My kids are still young, but my oldest is almost at the age I was when I started going places by myself, and he won't be able to do that because he's still nowhere near old enough to drive. I'm gonna have to schlep kids around until they're older teens (and see point about how much I hate driving). So yeah, I regret it. Alas, we simply couldn't afford to stay in the city, so there's nothing to be done about it.


These are some of the reasons we ended up buying a small home in the 800's in Brooklyn with a private driveway.
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icebreaker




 
 
 
 

Post  Wed, Oct 30 2019, 12:00 pm
Didn't leave Brooklyn, but Manhattan. I LOVE the suburbs but I miss the city. My kids have switched schools and it takes them so long to get to school from where we are that moving back to the city is at the top of our priority list. But maybe we'll try parts of eastern Queens (although it will be further away from my job but my kids getting to school quicker is more important to me).
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amother




Tangerine
 

Post  Wed, Oct 30 2019, 4:42 pm
I moved to Lakewood when I got married and there are so many things I miss about Brooklyn...
I would move back if it was affordable.
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amother




Bisque
 

Post  Thu, Oct 31 2019, 10:06 am
I wouldn't say I regret. There are pros and cons to every move so it really depends on your situation. I'll just answer from our perspective.

Pros:

Space! This was our primary motivation for moving. It's not just having a bigger house. The outdoors is fresher and cleaner too. In NY I always had the sensation of choking, like the walls were closing in on me.

Cons:

1. Chinuch. You have fewer options so you have to work with what's there. My kids miss their schools and friends in NY. Now they tell me they didn't care about the tiny apartment and would gladly go back just so they can be with their friends. Sadly, going back isn't an option bc the apartment we used to rent doesn't even exist anymore. The landlord tore it down to put up a big building. We couldn't afford even a smaller place than we used to have.

I do have a child with special needs and no. The services are not the same. But BH for now it's working out for her.

2. The food situation doesn't really bother me. Even in NY we didn't really buy pizza or takeout. We do pay more for meat, dairy products etc but fruits, vegs, canned goods are cheaper. We eat mostly vegetarian during the week. There's a kosher grocery and we can order in products from NY. We also stock up when we go in. There's no kosher bakery so we bake our own challa and cake. There are a few ladies who bake at home to sell, and there's one supermarket that sometimes carries NY challah. We can get pas yisroel pitas and bagels. Good thing I'm on keto!

3. Politics. In NY if you don't want to be involved in politics you can just tune it out and live your own life. OOT it affects everything. The shul, the school, your social life. I guess in a bigger community it's not such a big factor. In a small community like the one I'm in, it stinks.

4. Expenses. Home ownership is expensive. Car ownership is expensive. You need to pay for maintenance and repairs. It's all on you, and honest and reliable workers are hard to find. If anything goes wrong with the car, your life stops till it's fixed. And it's $500 here, $800 there. Not pocket change. This is on top of gas and insurance.

5. We live about a 3 hour drive from NY. We come in for most simchas. If we want to come in for shabbos or YT, nobody in our family has space for a family our size so we have to rent a place. It's very, very expensive.
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amother




Babypink
 

Post  Sun, Jan 19 2020, 7:37 am
I know I’m sorta late but I feel the need to respond regardless so here it is;
I moved away from Brooklyn abt 7 years ago and miss it to no end! Of course there are advantages to living in a big house that’s affordable etc, but being chassidish and not being able to drive due to school and communal rules make living in suburbia very difficult. I’d say sorta impossible but looking around and seeing so many women living with these conditions and being okay with it, makes one wonder about your own sanity and abilities, and it sorta becomes your issue, although it’s one that the lifestyle requires, but if everyone is okay with it and you aren’t, your the one being the odd man out. And why can’t your accept it?
The other issue is missing Family life, which it just is if your leave a greater family support system, your kids end up growing up without the bigger support system of
Cousins and cousin life, no running to do errands for grandma on Friday; no going over to cousins on Sunday to
Spend the day, no
Running out with sisters to do some shopping together etc,. It might all seem trivial, but once your move and have the house it just hits you, and you gotta live with the new reality.
And now that my kids are the ages that they’d be able to get to place alone, your realize that there is a certain smarts that city kids acquire by going shopping and going to simchas alone. And not having to wait hand n foot on Totty to chauffeur. Starts getting a big issue needing to
Transport the family all the time...
Seems like when your in Brooklyn the only thing yA see are the things that your lacking, once you get em you all of sudden realize that
Your missing so many things taken for granted... I’d run back in a heartbeat... Sad
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happyone




 
 
 
 

Post  Sun, Jan 19 2020, 7:52 am
I left Bklyn and will never look back !
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amother




Wine
 

Post  Sun, Jan 19 2020, 8:24 am
amother [ Periwinkle ] wrote:
Why would you want to hear half the story? If only people who left bklyn and regretted it responded in this thread, we'd get a few responses but we wouldn't learn that the overwhelming majority of people who leave bklyn are glad they did.


because that was actually ops question? The absurdity of just answering directly is very challenging on imamother.

Op obviously knows the advantages of moving, now she wants to hear the other side of the story that people never share.
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amother




Beige
 

Post  Sun, Jan 19 2020, 8:41 am
amother [ Babypink ] wrote:
I know I’m sorta late but I feel the need to respond regardless so here it is;
I moved away from Brooklyn abt 7 years ago and miss it to no end! Of course there are advantages to living in a big house that’s affordable etc, but being chassidish and not being able to drive due to school and communal rules make living in suburbia very difficult. I’d say sorta impossible but looking around and seeing so many women living with these conditions and being okay with it, makes one wonder about your own sanity and abilities, and it sorta becomes your issue, although it’s one that the lifestyle requires, but if everyone is okay with it and you aren’t, your the one being the odd man out. And why can’t your accept it?
The other issue is missing Family life, which it just is if your leave a greater family support system, your kids end up growing up without the bigger support system of
Cousins and cousin life, no running to do errands for grandma on Friday; no going over to cousins on Sunday to
Spend the day, no
Running out with sisters to do some shopping together etc,. It might all seem trivial, but once your move and have the house it just hits you, and you gotta live with the new reality.
And now that my kids are the ages that they’d be able to get to place alone, your realize that there is a certain smarts that city kids acquire by going shopping and going to simchas alone. And not having to wait hand n foot on Totty to chauffeur. Starts getting a big issue needing to
Transport the family all the time...
Seems like when your in Brooklyn the only thing yA see are the things that your lacking, once you get em you all of sudden realize that
Your missing so many things taken for granted... I’d run back in a heartbeat... Sad


Is there public trasportation?
My nieces who live in kj, do go out on foot for errands. The ones who live farther out of section (beirech moisha section) use the villiage bus to get to the central parts.
I see my neighbors kids (Blooming Grove) and my other neices (Highland mills) carpool with neighbors for taxis all the time.
Totty doesn't chauffeur at all.
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Tzutzie




 
 
 
 

Post  Sun, Jan 19 2020, 8:45 am
I moved out if brooklyn 5 years ago.
Best decision EVER.
Like I sometimes wonder WHY THE HELL I DIDNT MOVE EARLIER. I was the kinda gal who mourned my sister moving and used tkbsay ILL NEVER MOVE OUT OF BROOKLYN. Ha!
Ha!
Ha! Ha! Ha!

But I'll also be the first one to tell you, it is NOT for everyone.
So we should all make our desions based on what we think is best for US and not what other people are doing.

Oh, and yes, I LOVE pistachio flavored ice cream! Laugh
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amother




Brown
 

Post  Sun, Jan 19 2020, 8:52 am
amother [ Copper ] wrote:
I wish I could leave Brooklyn but I can't because dh is disabled and relies on public transportation.

If you are getting good benefits leaving ny may not make sense.
My neighbors husband is disabled and they may move to ny to get benefits.
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