Most awkward things people said to you

Learning

Fri, Jan 31 2020, 4:04 pm

amother [ Apricot ] wrote:

My sil was talking about the government help her mother was getting. I said "how does one even know to ask for that kind of assistance? I would never even think that something like that is offered"

SIL responded "Intelligent peopke would know"

(And I always considered myself smart before this)

you don’t realize but you were rude to them. Because people who all their life get government support know about that stuff. You sound snobby like you are not part of the poor group.

amother

Apricot

Fri, Jan 31 2020, 4:41 pm

Learning wrote:

you don’t realize but you were rude to them. Because people who all their life get government support know about that stuff. You sound snobby like you are not part of the poor group.

Sil is a lawyer and doesn't need or use government assistance. Is not poor. But there are still government programs that help older people. I don't remember what the program was that we were discussing, but it's not typical.
Sil is a bit of an intelligence snob. And smart as I am, I didn't go to college, so I cant be as smart as her or my brother (her dh). 😖😖

Dolly1

Sat, Feb 01 2020, 9:40 pm

amother [ Black ] wrote:

I walked into a bakery. Woman opens her mouth and says in an obnoxiously loud voice - "hi! I heard you've been diagnosed with MS. How much longer do you think you have till you'll be in a wheelchair?"

Walked right out and burst into tears in the car.

O-M-G!!
This one is for u: Hug

And this one is for her: Punch

The pain and shame u must hv felt!! Poor u!! May Hashem give u much strength!!

#BestBubby

Sat, Feb 01 2020, 10:16 pm

amother [ Black ] wrote:

I am so so so sorry this happened.

I hope you won't get hurt but I read a story about a man who had cancer and was publicly
humiliated. Afterwards the man fully recovered. The man's Rebbe told him the public shame
saved him from death.

SixOfWands

Sat, Feb 01 2020, 10:54 pm

amother [ Black ] wrote:

Just wanted to wish you many years of good health.

amother

Black

Sat, Feb 01 2020, 11:15 pm

SixOfWands wrote:

Just wanted to wish you many years of good health.

Just wanted to thank you - as well as the two posters before for your very kind words. So much appreciated. Thank you so much ☺️

It's hard going through a diagnosis alone and trying to remain upbeat and positive....and then have such comments made.

malki2

Sat, Feb 01 2020, 11:43 pm

amother [ Black ] wrote:

More proof that people can be born without a brain. So sorry.

amother

Jetblack

Sun, Feb 02 2020, 12:26 am

I was pregnant and working very part-time. Early in the pregnancy, I had put in a request for more hours at work, but didn't push it when complications came up, because I was in constant pain even while on painkillers for an unknown reason. (We later figured it out - after almost 3 months. It was unrelated to the pregnancy and treated with 5 weeks of medication) I also had a toddler at home and through being in constant physical pain and being pregnant, my husband was not helping out much because he was going through what was the start of a mental health crisis.
During that time, I was schmoozing with my supervisor at my job, mostly about work related stuff when she asked me what other job I have. I said that right now I don't work the other days. Her response "I guess some people just can't handle much." At wits end

amother

cornflower

Sun, Feb 02 2020, 1:52 am

amother [ Black ] wrote:

This can't be real . I cant imagine that a person can be this cruel . She obviously lost her brain or something . You should have asked her "how much longer until you get a brain transplant ?"
What a horrible thing to say !!! May you be blessed with health and simcha .

amother

Cerise

Sun, Feb 02 2020, 2:22 am

When I was 20 years old and working in an extremely high pressured and toxic environment, my boss gave me a job that was basically impossible to do. It was an extremely physical job, that didn't make sense for multiple reasons. (also, I was a secretary - not a personal trainer or anything in that field) either way, I obviously couldn't do the job. When she asked me how it's going and I told her that she should perhaps ask the janitor for help (more in his line of work than mine that's for sure) she retorted "why can't you *ever* do anything right?!?!" at a different time she also told me that "Hashem doesn't love her more than He loves me just because she is in a more powerful position and I'm just a secretary." no kidding!
Thank God I left that abusive job. It took a while to recover though.

amother

Amethyst

Sun, Feb 02 2020, 3:25 am

Is your special needs child High functioning or Low functioning???

I feel like answering: "Are YOU High functioning or low functioning???

I don't think a high functioning would ask such a question in a mothers face...
My answer is: He's high functioning, I'M Low functioning!

amother

Amethyst

Sun, Feb 02 2020, 3:33 am

Its not always a wrong statement or question other people say that makes it painful.

Sometimes it's your pain in that area, that they happen to touch, that causes your pain. Like when a person has a bunion on their toes, and someone steps on it, you will be jumping in agony.
People can ask an innocent question or say an innocent comment but to you it feels excruciating pain.
Example: where does your husband work?
If you don't have a husband or he doesn't have a job, it will feel horrible and painful.
A question like: How many children do you have? Can be an innocent question. or very painful- if you don't have children...
You should never ask questions, if you don't know for sure the other person's story.
Never approach an old friend or acquaintance with questions about her life, you might hit on a raw nerve.
Talk about neutral stuff, like the weather...

Last edited by amother on Mon, Feb 03 2020, 3:08 am; edited 1 time in total

amother

Blush

Sun, Feb 02 2020, 8:27 am

This didn’t happen to me but I witnessed it.
I was in a clothing store in Brooklyn waiting to pay for an item. The woman ahead of me was buying a lot, like an entire wardrobe. (She was a woman with a shaitel who looked about 40 years old) The man was ringing up piece after piece and the bill was getting high. Finally when the store owner was done and he saw the total he said, “I’m sorry, I can’t sell all this to you before you ask your husband if it’s okay.” The woman who was taking out her checkbook answered, “I’m not sure who you can ask because I don’t have a husband at the moment.” The store owner apologized and explained that it’s happened that sometimes husbands insist that their wives return clothing if they spent too much and they have even gotten angry at him for making the sale.
(I don’t think he will ever ask someone to check with her husband again after that)

FranticFrummie

Sun, Feb 02 2020, 10:50 am

amother [ Blush ] wrote:

Are we suddenly living in Saudi Arabia now? How was this woman allowed out of the house without a male escort in the first place? Hiding

<burqa

That woman could have been insanely wealthy, because she was the CEO of her own company, or a high powered attorney.

Maybe she was a recent widow, and this was the first time in a year that she's been able to buy new clothes. She may have lost a lot of weight during the mourning process.

It would be better to deal with returns, or have a solid return policy in place, than to risk insulting someone like that.

I would have been tempted to say something really snarky, and then walk out without paying for a thing.