My baby is BH playing so nicely on the floor...

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Forum -> Parenting our children

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amother

Black

Sun, Nov 29 2020, 8:43 pm

avrahamama wrote:

Yes I know this well. That's how I end up in Ima so much ... If I get up he starts to scream and pull on my skirt. As long as I sit here doing absolutely nothing there is peace.

So funny avrahamama for some reason I thought you’re 55sh... I don’t know why. Maybe because you wrote you’re a mikva lady once. And you sound wise.

amother

Black

Sun, Nov 29 2020, 8:46 pm

amother [ Burlywood ] wrote:

Because spoiling her into controlling your life is better?

Rav matisyahau salamon says it’s ok to do that only by bedtime but only on condition that you come in every 10 minutes, give a hug and a kiss and say sweetheart it’s time to go to bed now and walk back out.
Not to just let them shreik and ignore them. No.

amother

Gray

Sun, Nov 29 2020, 8:47 pm

amother [ Burlywood ] wrote:

When babies discover cause and effect you can spoil them. Usually a baby playing on the floor has already reached that milestone.

According to whom?

amother

Burlywood

Sun, Nov 29 2020, 8:50 pm

amother [ Gray ] wrote:

According to whom?

science, american academy of pediatrics

Stars

Sun, Nov 29 2020, 8:54 pm

amother [ Burlywood ] wrote:

science, american academy of pediatrics

links please?

If I google "can babies be spoiled" I get a million results all saying the same thing. No. Enlighten me please.

amother

Burlywood

Sun, Nov 29 2020, 9:02 pm

Stars wrote:

links please?

If I google "can babies be spoiled" I get a million results all saying the same thing. No. Enlighten me please.

https://www.webmd.com/parentin.....ntion

avrahamama

Sun, Nov 29 2020, 9:23 pm

amother [ Black ] wrote:

So funny avrahamama for some reason I thought you’re 55sh... I don’t know why. Maybe because you wrote you’re a mikva lady once. And you sound wise.

lol I am a mikvah lady. Where I live the mikvahs in my community prefer younger mikvah ladies. I think I was 30 when I started.

I don't know if I'm wise. I daven daily for that binah supposed have as a woman. In the meantime I'll try the path of least resistance.

avrahamama

Sun, Nov 29 2020, 9:30 pm

amother [ Burlywood ] wrote:

https://www.webmd.com/parenting/baby/features/infants-attention

This article said there's no such thing as spoiling a baby. And that babies don't manipulate and control.

In any case. Science and the Pediatric Association might say that you aren't causing long term damage by letting baby cry.

But I don't think they're saying that you're creating a spoiled and controlling manipulator by not letting baby cry.

amother

Gray

Sun, Nov 29 2020, 9:32 pm

amother [ Burlywood ] wrote:

https://www.webmd.com/parenting/baby/features/infants-attention

Ummm.. did you actually read that link? Because it says exactly what everyone here is saying. Besides you.

amother

Burlywood

Sun, Nov 29 2020, 9:42 pm

amother [ article ] wrote:

A spoiled child is one that's manipulative, but babies don't learn until they're about 9 months that they can cry to get you to do something for them," says Dr. Barbara Howard, assistant professor of pediatrics at Johns Hopkins University in Baltimore and a member of the American Academy of Pediatrics' committee

amother

cornflower

Sun, Nov 29 2020, 9:43 pm

How old is your baby? Please feed your baby more. Get your baby to eat and mommy and baby will be happier. What are you feeding baby?

avrahamama

Sun, Nov 29 2020, 9:49 pm

amother [ Burlywood ] wrote:

This is so interesting to me. Because the neurological age for adulthood has been pushed to about 25/26 yrs old.

But if at 9 months (barely a year!) you cry because you want or need something. Some pediatrician somewhere will brand you as a spoiled and manipulative baby.

amother

Wine

Sun, Nov 29 2020, 10:09 pm

I feel bad for your babies amother Burlywood.

Babies NEED attention, to be held, to be shown physical and emotional responses just like they need food. There is no such thing as spoiling a baby!

amother

Sun, Nov 29 2020, 10:39 pm

amother [ cornflower ] wrote:

How old is your baby? Please feed your baby more. Get your baby to eat and mommy and baby will be happier. What are you feeding baby?

Lol I try! 7/8 months. She nurses often. She refused to take bottles until very recently she'll drink an ounce or two at the babysitter. I try to give her baby jars and oatmeal or food (chicken soup she likes) once or twice a day she is beginning to eat a bit from them now (maybe half a jar on a good day) but often won't open her mouth or sticks in her thumb. Dr says not to force feed.

amother

Magenta

Sun, Nov 29 2020, 10:43 pm

My dd (my first girl!) is similar. I bring her into whichever room I am working in and set her up with toys nearby.

amother

Green

Sun, Nov 29 2020, 10:51 pm

OP - have you tried a babywearer? At least that way you'd be hands free and baby can cuddle to you.

My baby is under 3 weeks with really bad gas and cries all the time and I've already gotten a couple of comments suggesting the baby is manipulating me into carrying her. She's not even 3 weeks old!! Maybe the people making these comments are spoiled and manipulative.

amother

Turquoise

Sun, Nov 29 2020, 11:50 pm

sounds adorable Smile

I had one baby taht behaved this way. for ALL my work I used a babywearer. he didnt love this, I hoonestly didnt ejoy it (some mothers love the concept- its not really my first choice) BUT I got my thibgs done without him being unhappy.

my babies are ususally in the stroller or on the floor, in their daycrib etc. but this one particular child was in the babywearer when I had to get things done- otgherwise we would have lived in a messy house with no supper and zero laundry.

everyone who says I spoiled him_ he really screamed for a LONG time whenever I left , and didnt calm down easily-. he is 9 years old now and the easiest child of all!!! he is indipendant super fast worker, does great in school emotionally very strong and demands literally NOTHING from us - like no special wishes at all. happy and contect b´´H. I would have never guessed when he was a baby that he will eventually develop into such a great, helpful kid (hey he was always sweet just difficult and hard to please Smile

)
some of my 'easier' babies are far more complicated to deal with now that they are older (hey, they are still sweeet Smile

) - I see ZERO correlation between their behaviour as a baby and their 'spoildness', ie. how much time, attention etc. they demand now.

amother

Goldenrod

Sun, Nov 29 2020, 11:59 pm

amother [ Burlywood ] wrote:

Because spoiling her into controlling your life is better?

From where did you get this idea? This shows no understanding of child development or psychology. There is absolutely no such thing as spoiling a baby.

LovesHashem

Mon, Nov 30 2020, 12:04 am

I somewhat agree that babies understand at that age. My neighbor works from home and her ten months year old isn't like this. Maybe because she is used to mommy for most of her life being busy during certain hours of the day.

I agree with the poster saying to go and try to cool or do laundry or whatever and constantly reassure baby through talking and touching them that you are there and love them.

nchr

Mon, Nov 30 2020, 9:24 am

I don't know how old OP's baby is but of course at a certain age babies start associating crying with being picked up if you pick them up or play with them everytime they cry. The same way you can sleep train a child you can train a child to play nicely when you are not entertaining him/her or when you walk to a different room. Sitting on a couch all day so your baby doesn't cry sounds ridiculous.

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