What is your major life challenge currently?

amother

Lemon

Tue, Jun 22 2021, 9:00 pm

amother [ Black ] wrote:

I’m coming up on my 12th month of TTC 🥺 every single month I think THIS is gonna be the month and I re-strengthen my emunah in Hashem each month even tho it’s hard and feels foolish to keep hoping. And then…my period comes Sad

Hope you don't resent me saying this, but I just wanted to share that I got pregnant with my first child on my 12 th month trying (and it was with a little help from Clomid, first cycle I tried with medication).

amother

Lime

Tue, Jun 22 2021, 9:08 pm

Sif
Watching the pain on my husband's face as he ries to warmly wish people Mazel Tov daily.
Seeing the sadness of this affecting my only child.
My heart is constantly broken for them.
It's sometimes so hard it takes all my strength just to push through the day.
I'm in constant agony.

amother

DarkViolet

Tue, Jun 22 2021, 9:10 pm

I will preface this by saying I know I am blessed in many ways. My heart goes out to all of you strong women dealing with so many difficult challenges.

The biggest challenge in my life right now is infertility. After two years of trying and two early miscarriages, we’ve now started IVF (I had my first egg retrieval today!). I’m finding it a hard process not just physically, but even more so emotionally.

amother

Feverfew

Tue, Jun 22 2021, 9:58 pm

My life is quite wonderful BH and I am generally happy and upbeat - I thank Hashem daily for helping me work on myself to be such a happy person.

My major challenges currently are patience and hope while waiting for a get for over two years. I am constantly telling myself “yeshuas hashem keherif ayin”.

And dealing with a special needs child that takes a lot of my energy while single handedly raising my children while having the full responsibility of my children’s emotional , financial , physical and mental well being.

It’s not easy but I try to stay calm.

amother

Firebrick

Tue, Jun 22 2021, 10:44 pm

Low grade depression
Sif and people being insensitive about it (I have a few children bh)
No satisfying life, feels pointless and like waiting for one day to end to start another one, same with week, month, year.
DH health issues
People expecting a lot from me, more than I’m able to provide physically and emotionally
Children not doing great in a couple of areas
Just Punch

amother

Impatiens

Tue, Jun 22 2021, 10:52 pm

amother [ Brown ] wrote:

Time to get personal. Two big ones from my past.

Shana rishona: No money. Living on pasta and potatoes. Fruitless job hunting. Grumpy husband. Not a great year.

12th grade: Deciding whether to marry DH. Very different political and religious upbringing (I was not raised frum), plus I thought I was asexual. Really intense times.

Please speak to your local rabbi you may be able to get food voucher and food parcel don't be embarrassed to take when you are back on your feet you can repay back we did this

amother

Tan

Tue, Jun 22 2021, 10:54 pm

Thank you OP for starting this thread. Although it hurts to read all of this, it does give me chizuk that I'm not the only one suffering. You see people outside and think that everyone is doing great but you. (I am that person too with a smile on my face, but things are not good).

My list:
Dealing with my husband's addiction and deciding if it's worth putting up with it
My lack of trust in anyone
Difficult parents
Difficult special needs children
Hate my job.
The worst of all which makes all the other worse: My mental state. It's not safe or good at all. I can't even manage to go back to my psychiatrist or therapist for things that have occurred recently and my lack of trust in anyone.
Also constantly waiting for the next 'kick' of a bad thing to happen as it doesn't ever seem to stop.

I am davening for all of you that you should have yeshuos very soon.

PeanutMama

Tue, Jun 22 2021, 11:55 pm

I’m just here trying to see hashem as a merciful g-d and not a xtian g-d it’s so hard. Like I have times where I would think about my past and I think “hashem is gonna punish me! It’s too late to do teshuva/fix it.”

Even tho I KNOW hashem is definitely not like jdude…..AT ALL…..the fear is still there. Like a background fear. Idk how to explain it. I pretty much hate the church priests and the xtian religious teachers I had when I went to catechism classes. Sooo much guilt and fear (in my opinion.) I tried not paying attention…but for some reason that message just got to me and stuck to me.
I’m working soooooo hard to banish that view from my mind and heart and soul with my mashpia. He’s definitely doing his best….but oy I think this is more like psychological. That’s the top thing I’m working on. To me it’s more important than learning Yiddish or improving on my lashon kodesh reading. Even tho those 2 things are almost as important, but the main thing for me is to see hashem as a Jewish g-d.

BH physically and mentally I’m in a happier place, but:
- I’m shy so don’t have so many friends the loneliness is insane. I’m too scared to make friends heh.
- I try to be a good mommy to my little boy but I’m finding myself snapping at him like my stepdad would snap at me when I run out of patience for the stupidest thing. I’m trying to stop snapping at him, saying out loud “Baruch Hashem I have a healthy little boy!”
- working on getting my stepdads treatment of me and my mother out of my head and life…I’m not there anymore and he’s definitely not in my life.

amother

Viola

Wed, Jun 23 2021, 12:10 am

We recently moved to a new country. It’s a lot to get used to. It’s so hard for me. My dh doesn’t have a job yet, my children a school. But dh said if I don’t move our marriage was over. So I followed him. I hope I don’t regret it because I’m starting to. I feel like I had no choice in the matter.

I suffer from mental health issues.

We have a very difficult child.

Other then that, I am very blessed. I went through big stuff in the past (chronically unemployed depressed husband, my own physical and mental health issues, abusive childhood, crazy mother act) and this is a joke.

amother

Candycane

Wed, Jun 23 2021, 12:21 am

Like some amothers before me, my most wonderful challenge right now is secondary infertility and the spillover on our shalom bayis. it is so so so painful, it's a physical pain sitting on my heart that is constantly there. I never thought that it'd be like this, but I can't face pregnant women or even women with lots of kids. I just cry when I see them. I haven't seen my family in a long time and we'll be seeing them soon, I'm dreading all the stares my stomach is soon going to be facing.... Also it's a very private struggle.

amother

Royalblue

Wed, Jun 23 2021, 3:29 am

Hi I am so sad for all of you! May Hashem help you all soon! Stay strong!
I cant say I am having any difficulties or challenges now and my challenges are minor compared to infertility and shalom beis issues.
But I'm going to throw it in any way because everyone has theirs even if some are bigger or smaller. So here goes:
Im living in a 2 bedroom tiny apartment with 3 kids DESPERATE to move.
My daughter is suffering from encopresis which is horrible for her to have to deal with. I can only continue with what the Dr's are advising me to do but it's affecting her social life too! As a mother I am going crazy trying not to scream at her when she comes home with soiled underwear from school and I need to keep on reminding myself that its NOT HER FAULT!!! and then having to help her clean it up!

amother

Royalblue

Wed, Jun 23 2021, 3:45 am

amother [ OP ] wrote:

For those who's struggles are your parents Sholem Bayis or brother in jail, can you try to tune them out of your thoughts? Emotionally let it go.
You have enough to deal with in your immediate life.
It might bother you but don't take it so much to heart.

It's so easy to say that. I read on another thread where someone wrote how a relative is being mechalel shabbos with her WhatsApp... ppl answering MYB. I was a bit shocked how can you MYB?!? how does one even do that?!?! it would still linger in the back of my mind I can't just say "oh well my brother's in jail, who cares ill just mind my own business" it's still gonna bother me!

amother

Seagreen

Wed, Jun 23 2021, 3:53 am

Major challenges now.
My baby had a major surgery yesterday. Bh it was very successful but it's hard seeing her so out of it and being in the hospital with her.
Someone smashed into me on sunday while I was driving. My first accident ever. I am driving 15 years. Bh bh bh we are all ok. I had 2 kids with me, but now I have no car and insurance is gonna be a fight cuz itvwas a taxi with no normal insurance.
Otherwise I have one super challenging child.