What is the solution? Lakewood

amother

Bluebell

Wed, Jan 05 2022, 7:06 pm

amother [ DarkRed ] wrote:

I don't live in Lakewood, so maybe I shouldn't have posted here.

But no, when the schools made me miserable and I lived a very painfully poor lifestyle for years to pay partial tuition, which they didn't even appreciate, just yelled at me that I couldn't pay more. We're talking my electricity getting cut off, running out of food stamps and not being able to buy anything else. And they still were awful to me.

So no I don't donate to schools that don't appreciate the sacrifices parents are making to pay even discounted tuition.

That's ok.

The yeshivos and schools need really big donors. Those that can give thousands, or even hundreds of thousands of dollars. There is plenty of money in our communities, and maybe if we would have all given our share this wouldn't have happened to you. I'm sorry you went through such painful years, please enjoy the money you have now if you are in a better financial situation. Buy yourself something to make you happy!

amother

Charcoal

Wed, Jan 05 2022, 7:06 pm

amother [ DarkRed ] wrote:

Lakewood tuition is way less than other areas and most schools will give a kodesh discount as well without hassling you. So I’m sorry you were treated that way but I don’t think it applies to Lakewood.

amother

Nemesia

Wed, Jan 05 2022, 7:10 pm

amother [ Clematis ] wrote:

This thread will probably go on for 10 pages but the answer was already written.

PEOPLE BEING OPEN TO SENDING TO NEW SCHOOLS.

Now everyone can keep fighting all night for for the rest of tomorrow

please list new school. I tried schools which I thought were new but seems they r booked solid.
Please not Drav Meir, if it's Brooklyn style its not heimish enough and too much acedemic pressure[

amother

Arcticblue

Wed, Jan 05 2022, 8:01 pm

amother [ Charcoal ] wrote:

I don’t think Lakewood has an elementary school crisis. There’s enough slots for everyone. HS is a different story.

There most definitely is an elementary school crisis. Many girls aren't getting into schools.
For the people saying to just send to a new school, it isn't that simple. I didn't get into schools and the ones I applied to are about 7 years (2 of them) and another is 3 years old. Does that count as new? I won't consider any newer than that for 2 reasons: 1. the chinuch isn't set up yet. If a kid gets in trouble, what happens? Do the teacher's know how to handle the kids? Do the principals know how to run a school or are they just a rich person who opened a school? 2. The crowd isn't formed yet. For people not in Lakewood, I understand that you won't understand this point but in Lakewood, every school has a type. A school may say that they want a certain type, but at the end of the day, the new schools take who they get. What if the other parents are on a different Hashkafa level than me? Should I send to a place with people who are more to the left of me because I didn't get into a school that is up to my standard? Or should I feel comfortable that everyone is more to the right of me and feel a pressure when I take out my smartphone to take pictures at the siddur play?
New schools just aren't established enough to know how they will turn out. Before people say these 2 points don't matter, 1. they matter to me and 2. it has happened to me with my son and therefor will not make the same mistake with my daughter.

amother

Charcoal

Wed, Jan 05 2022, 8:04 pm

amother [ Arcticblue ] wrote:

No they don’t count as new. Unless they’re adding another parallel class they will be full from siblings.

amother

Cornsilk

Wed, Jan 05 2022, 8:10 pm

amother [ Nemesia ] wrote:

please list new school. I tried schools which I thought were new but seems they r booked solid.
Please not Drav Meir, if it's Brooklyn style its not heimish enough and too much acedemic pressure[

Well how dare they not open a school exactly your type.
I demand that they open for every exact “type” of semi heimish, maybe more heimish, maybe academic maybe not, that every new person who wants to move to Lakewood wants.
Oh and also how dare they ask for tuition. See they only like the rich kids.
Somehow, someone will pay for all these many new schools for each type, and if not they’ll give a din vcheshbon in shamayim.

amother

Arcticblue

Wed, Jan 05 2022, 8:26 pm

amother [ Cornsilk ] wrote:

I'm sorry, your post is extremely rude. Everyone on here just announced that there is no crisis, and just apply to a new school. Well, the poster is asking for a new school that she fits into. Do you live in Lakewood? If you do, you know that every school has a "type". You don't apply to a school that isn't your type, just because you didn't get in to the ones you wanted. Out of Lakewood, there are community schools and are not strictly one type. If you aren't chassidish but Belz opens a new school, would you tell the poster to send there? If she is Belz and a more LW Bais Yaakov opens, would you tell her to apply there? Your sarcasm is very rude. There is a lady behind that post who is trying to find an appropriate school for her child. If you have nothing nice or constructive to say, PLEASE DON'T SAY IT!

amother

Arcticblue

Wed, Jan 05 2022, 8:36 pm

amother [ Charcoal ] wrote:

No they don’t count as new. Unless they’re adding another parallel class they will be full from siblings.

Exactly. So if a person isn't zoche to get into school right away, they should be the experiment of a brand new school? I know that most new schools make it and turn out good, but not every new school is. I've seen a new school become much more to the left than they were originally planning, I've seen new schools close, I've seen new schools having to merge with more established schools because they couldn't make it on their own...I've interviewed at a newer school where people told me that they are happy and that of course the principal is great- she has 10 kids, she's obviously great! Well, I found her to be very uncaring and unfriendly towards my daughter. I've interviewed in new schools where they won't say what type of families they are looking for, just nice families. Well, out of Lakewood, that works, in Lakewood, it always turns into a type. One of those schools has a mix the first year and then next 2 years are distinctly to the left. It takes a lot of mesiras nefesh to send to a new school and it isn't a simple decision. I wish people-especially people who were never put in this position- would stop making it out to be the only solution. How about not giving answers until you are done interviewing everyone? How about spending more time interviewing so you can interview more possible families? There are many other solutions I'm sure but telling everyone who didn't get in to just go to a new school isn't the answer. New schools do work for some people, I'm not saying it doesn't. But it isn't a one size fits all answer.

amother

Narcissus

Wed, Jan 05 2022, 8:41 pm

They say the teachers aren't getting paid well. But I think instead of a raise schools should have smaller class size. Imagine if each class had 18-20 girls instead of 27. Its less hmwk, less parents and benefits the child. Established schools should team up with rich business people and hire new principals to have sister schools for parents moving. They should be similar in Hashanah. Another way this would help is funding. My friends daughter daughter had a problem in primary. Some new schools told her that her problem is a little more severe and as a new school they don't have the funddings. Plus the school already has enough of -not so bright, or impossible kids. It was months of beginning until she finally got into a school, after school already started. She's not happy. She's trying to get I somewhere for her second but since sibling is in a school 2 everyone is giving her an attitude that she should be greatful. And school feels she owes them her life for accepting her daughter.

amother

Wed, Jan 05 2022, 9:17 pm

amother [ Arcticblue ] wrote:

So you’re talking likely about Meoros or Nachlas which both had hundreds of applicants for 20-30 slots.
They aren’t new by Lakewood standards and they’re both very “hot” schools. There are some older schools that are easier to get into than these.

amother

Nemesia

Wed, Jan 05 2022, 9:21 pm

amother [ Arcticblue ] wrote:

Thank you for helping me express my thoughts...I'm not the best at this
If your kids are currently in BYBP (not refering to those who already left a while ago and were itching for a different lifestyle. I'm refering to more of a chasidish background or chasidish inclined (not yeshivish) but decent frum families... We are not part of any Chasidus we are also not x chasidish and our kids dont really speak/ understand much yiddish. Yet, we are being told by our the Vaad and principals that our only chance basically is a chasidish yiddish speaking school. Yes we know that the lakewood schools just have no room... But when your child is already advancing in Hebrew have her learn in a new language? What happens with HS, will a Bais Yaakov take them in ?? They will struggle with hebrew etc....
I'm so wondering why BYBP doesn't open a branch? It's so needed and the school is shrinking every year.
2 former bybp parents have told me that the new school they are in have had negetive influence on their girls. Not the school but friends... So I am concerned with this. I know many of you have brought up the point of out of town schools being a happy mix and somehow you werent affected. It sounds beautuful but I believe Brooklyn and Lakewood are not cut from the same cloth

amother

Wed, Jan 05 2022, 9:23 pm

amother [ Arcticblue ] wrote:

In Lakewood there are a handful of very hasidish schools, a bigger handful of heimish, two Syrian, and a few that would be considered somewhat modern.

But there are 20-30 regular bais Yaakov schools. Some are a fancier crowd, some a more out of town vibe, some more with it, some more yeshivish. But you are giving extreme examples. Most girls in Lakewood would do fine in Bais Tova, Bnos devora, moreshes, meoros , neemas, tiferes, bais faiga, shiras Chaim, nachlas… if you’re rejecting bais tova but insisting on tiferes this is Of if the problem . These are all regular bais Yaakov schools and the differences between the crowds is usually in our heads….

amother

Cornsilk

Wed, Jan 05 2022, 9:24 pm

amother [ Arcticblue ] wrote:

So if your belt and Lakewood doesn’t have a belt school, use your seichel and don’t move there.
Or use your money, and open up your own belt school.
Don’t demand Lakewood figure out the problem for you.
You know whose not being nice? All the people bashing the askanim and mechanchim in lakes who are building schools for you!
You know who is being nice? Me! Who is defending these people from your baseless accusations

amother

Wed, Jan 05 2022, 9:26 pm

amother [ Arcticblue ] wrote:

Nobody prefers new schools that’s I’m aware of. But a very large percentage of us send because that’s the option available. My oldest went to a brand new school and my third child will be in the same school which is now considered an established school.

amother

Arcticblue

Wed, Jan 05 2022, 9:26 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

Yes, I know. But there aren't "older" schools that my family would fit into. And I had pull in one of those schools. In Lakewood, you apply wherever you have pull, and that is where I had pull. I have zero pull in an older school. I also applied to a newer school, but as soon as it gets a specific name or reputation, if becomes popular and all of a sudden it isn't considered a "new" school and it is hard to get in. At the end of the day, you apply where you fit in and have pull, even if the schools aren't brand new. Because a school is only "new" for 2 years, then it gets a name and isn't "new" anymore and anyone applying to those schools is considered "picky" because it's a "hot" school.