Teachers Gift | Imamother

amother

Apricot

Wed, Nov 30 2022, 5:31 pm

amother OP wrote:

If that is the way people feel won't do sheitel don't want to be inappropriate what do you think the maximum I can do with each check that wouldn't be considered inappropriate as this last comment posted that I can go all out there and some people are saying $200 can people chime in want a vote so that I can see what most people think and reasoning and will base it off that thanks everyone for all your help and input

If you want a vote then make a poll.

You're basically asking the same question you asked in your first post, and you already have 5 pages of responses.....not sure what else you want everyone to say

amother

Wed, Nov 30 2022, 5:36 pm

amother Apricot wrote:

If you want a vote then make a poll.

You're basically asking the same question you asked in your first post, and you already have 5 pages of responses.....not sure what else you want everyone to say

would rather have a poll with everyone writing reasoning so that I can get a feel of reasoning and make a decision

amother

Alyssum

Wed, Nov 30 2022, 5:57 pm

amother OP wrote:

Why do you care? JUST WRITE A CHECK!!!
This year I gave 500.
Some ppl give 1000.
Some more. Some less.

amother

Apricot

Wed, Nov 30 2022, 6:04 pm

amother OP wrote:

would rather have a poll with everyone writing reasoning so that I can get a feel of reasoning and make a decision

This thread is going in circles. You already have more than 5 pages of people writing their opinions and reasoning. There isn't much more to add at this this point. Just make a decision and whatever you give will be greatly appreciated.

amother

Wed, Nov 30 2022, 6:08 pm

amother Alyssum wrote:

Why do you care? JUST WRITE A CHECK!!!
This year I gave 500.
Some ppl give 1000.
Some more. Some less.

I don't care what people give I care what would be considered inappropriate and I am confused what number that is that is why I would like for people to take a poll with saying reasoning as there are people saying $10000+ or some people saying give as much as you can as I teacher we can really use it and it is not inappropriate and then there are some saying anything over $200 is inappropriate so trying to get a feeling with reasoning so that me and my husband can make a appropriate decision

amother

Chartreuse

Wed, Nov 30 2022, 6:12 pm

amother OP wrote:

And you have 6 pages worth of responses and a poll. What else do you want? Are you really not capable of making this decision on your own or are you just bored?

amother

Apricot

Wed, Nov 30 2022, 6:19 pm

amother OP wrote:

But you already have 6 pages of people giving their opinions and reasoning. So read through it and discuss it with your husband.
You're not going to get the same response from everyone. You're going to get the range of responses that you just summarized in your post. You know what you're going to hear. Some people are gonna say max 200 and some are gonna say go as high as you want.

amother

Wed, Nov 30 2022, 6:25 pm

amother Apricot wrote:

Thanks for trying to help trying to get the reason what is the no no not to go above $200 and what is the reason to go as high as possible and being appropriate not getting a feeling on the reasoning why each one feels so extreme

amother

Apricot

Wed, Nov 30 2022, 6:29 pm

amother OP wrote:

If you want to get a feeling for the reasoning, then read through this thread. If 6 pages wasn't enough to give you that understanding, then I don't think continuing the thread will help much.

amother

Rose

Wed, Nov 30 2022, 7:24 pm

OP, you're amazing for thinking of giving so generously. I think give the most you can comfortably give. No matter how much you will give that will not be flaunting at all. It's just never flaunting or inappropriate when you give to teachers. She will remember your kindness her whole life that's all.

amother

Dimgray

Wed, Nov 30 2022, 9:34 pm

amother OP wrote:

I think this is your answer. People are saying such different things because every person thinks differently. What that tells you is that all teachers were also not created equally. The teacher that you have in mind might greatly appreciate it or might feel like a charity case or many things in between.

Not sure what you should do but just pointing this out.

amother

Wed, Nov 30 2022, 11:15 pm

amother Dimgray wrote:

great insight really appreciate it We are just more confused now what to do from here (wish I knew who teachers best friend is and I would call them to give me insight...)

amother

Orchid

Wed, Nov 30 2022, 11:21 pm

OP, just want to say that this is really kind of you. I'm sure your children's teachers will appreciate it. I think if you give a very very generous amount- like 10,000 or something like that, if you write a note thanking them and saying that bh you can afford to give like this and you just want to show appreciation for teachers/ rebbeim who give so much of themselves.... I don't think it is uncomfortable. As long as you write something like bh we are blessed to be able to give and we really value what the teachers/rebbeim do. You can maybe even write something like please don't feel any obligation to do more for our child, we are just giving according to our means...

amother

Outerspace

Wed, Nov 30 2022, 11:25 pm

amother Orchid wrote:

This is right on target!

amother

Wed, Nov 30 2022, 11:30 pm

amother Orchid wrote:

We were thinking something like this but was afraid of flaunting
So we thought not to write we are giving according to our needs

but we thought to write something of we know how much effort our teachers put in and just writing a letter showing all the appreciation we have for what we see we do not play up the gift just play up the appreciation we have and everything the teacher does... getting very detailed about their lessons (BTW we really are very indebted B'H our kids are great kids but the effort these teachers put into their lessons and devotion they have to the classes is unbelievable and it is true that we feel extremely indebted for all of that)

amother

Orchid

Wed, Nov 30 2022, 11:44 pm

I hear that you are afraid of flaunting. Can you explain more what you mean by that?

I'm just concerned that if you give a large amount without the reassurance that you can afford this amount, the teacher will either feel badly about it or feel obligated to give more to your child.

If that is what you are able to give, I don't think you are flaunting. But obviously you can only do what you feel comfortable with.

ETA- what's the alternative to this being within your means? you can't really afford it but are doing it anyways?