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Forum
-> Children's Health
amother
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Thu, Dec 07 2023, 2:05 pm
My son is 16, he often plays with action figures. He role plays with them making noises like fighting noises. I can't really explain but is it a concern? He may be playing soccer with them or something, I'm not quite sure!
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amother
Gray
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Thu, Dec 07 2023, 2:09 pm
I haven't personally known a kid to play with barbies/action figures so long, so I'd say not normal, but not concerning. Everyone is a little different, and this is a harmless thing. I wouldn't mention it to him. He'll probably stop soon, but even if not, who cares?
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amother
Chambray
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Thu, Dec 07 2023, 2:44 pm
My 8th grade daughter still plays with her American girl dolls. Its more making their hair and choosing outfits, but she still enjoys it.
As long as he isn't expecting to interact with peers that way, I think its fine. Maybe not super common, but people of all ages can benefit from play.
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amother
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Thu, Dec 07 2023, 3:27 pm
Thanks, it's far from his main hobby. He likes to watch videos, go on his tablet (he's only on some sports channels) and play soccer with his friends, and dh. Basically this evening he was asking me for the computer to go on, I said no (it doesn't go on, on Thursdays) my other kids were out at a chanukah event. He didn't want to go with, he was complaining that he's bored. Then I saw him playing with my younger son's new figures. When I saw, he just said 'son let's me play with them, he knows' so he doesn't chose to buy them with his own money, or get them as a present from us, but he does pick them up sometimes. Usually on a shabbos afternoon when he's bored. He's off yeshiva now until Tuesday as it's chanukah.
.
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amother
Dimgray
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Thu, Dec 07 2023, 3:30 pm
My 49-year-old DH does Lego and reads comic books. Is that weird? Probably a little, definitely a little.
It doesn’t negate the fact that he is a wonderful husband and father, has friends, hold down a job, and as a contributing member of our community. So he has his shtick. As long as he has friends and usually participates in main stream activities, I wouldn’t be concerned.
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amother
Opal
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Thu, Dec 07 2023, 4:21 pm
I have a daughter who’s also into imaginative play and I also worry it’s not age-appropriate.I disagree with the other posters it’s not reading comics and building Lego.
But maybe it’s ok. Something bothers me about it.
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Success10
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Thu, Dec 07 2023, 4:23 pm
It's not typical for that age bracket. But if there's nothing else concerning about his behavior, then I wouldn't stress it.
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Bnei Berak 10
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Thu, Dec 07 2023, 5:05 pm
amother Dimgray wrote: | My 49-year-old DH does Lego and reads comic books. Is that weird? Probably a little, definitely a little.
It doesn’t negate the fact that he is a wonderful husband and father, has friends, hold down a job, and as a contributing member of our community. So he has his shtick. As long as he has friends and usually participates in main stream activities, I wouldn’t be concerned. |
There's nothing wrong with Lego and comic books at all even if you are 49 years old. We all have our shticks. Once in a while one is allowed to have some fun.
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amother
Caramel
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Thu, Dec 07 2023, 5:35 pm
I still played with my dolls and with my playmobile at that age. I turned out just fine (in my 30s, with a graduate degree and a well-paying job, wonderful husband and children). Don't worry about it. While many kids stray away from imaginary play around their teenage years, not all do and they are just fine, they just have an additional set of interests.
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amother
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Thu, Dec 07 2023, 5:59 pm
amother Caramel wrote: | I still played with my dolls and with my playmobile at that age. I turned out just fine (in my 30s, with a graduate degree and a well-paying job, wonderful husband and children). Don't worry about it. While many kids stray away from imaginary play around their teenage years, not all do and they are just fine, they just have an additional set of interests. |
Thanks, so nice to hear!
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tichellady
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Thu, Dec 07 2023, 6:10 pm
Even if it’s not normal, there is nothing you could do about it that won’t be harmful. It’s definitely quirky but doesn’t sound alarming to me
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amother
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Thu, Dec 07 2023, 6:20 pm
tichellady wrote: | Even if it’s not normal, there is nothing you could do about it that won’t be harmful. It’s definitely quirky but doesn’t sound alarming to me |
Yes he is definitely a bit different (quirky?) to other kids his age. We do see that to some extent, and he's in a very small 'specialised' yeshiva with more one of one staff. It's hard because he's our oldest. When I bring up these 'little' concerns to my dh, he's like you. And so what? Everyone is different. But still, I worry. I'm worried about who will want to marry him, will she handle him?! Etc...I guess he's got a lot of growing up to do in all areas but still I can't help but worry.
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behappy2
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Thu, Dec 07 2023, 6:20 pm
He may just have a really good imagination. If he has friends and hobbies all is well I would think
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amother
Begonia
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Thu, Dec 07 2023, 6:26 pm
amother OP wrote: | Yes he is definitely a bit different (quirky?) to other kids his age. We do see that to some extent, and he's in a very small 'specialised' yeshiva with more one of one staff. It's hard because he's our oldest. When I bring up these 'little' concerns to my dh, he's like you. And so what? Everyone is different. But still, I worry. I'm worried about who will want to marry him, will she handle him?! Etc...I guess he's got a lot of growing up to do in all areas but still I can't help but worry. |
We all worry about our kids. It’s a built in part of mothering. Your son may be doing something a little unusual for his age but I wouldn’t say a word to him about it. The only thing you’ll accomplish is making him feel bad about himself and that’s the last thing you want to do to a kid that age.
My bracha to you in honor of the first night of Chanukah is you should never have a bigger worry from him or any of your kids.
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mommy3b2c
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Thu, Dec 07 2023, 6:53 pm
My kids all do this and it starts phasing out at age 10/11. I can still catch them here or there at age 12 and then they stop by 13. It does seem very off for a 16 year old. That being said, if he is other wise socially normal , then who cares ? If he has other social/emotional issues then those need to be addressed .
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amother
Slategray
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Thu, Dec 07 2023, 7:03 pm
amother OP wrote: | Yes he is definitely a bit different (quirky?) to other kids his age. We do see that to some extent, and he's in a very small 'specialised' yeshiva with more one of one staff. It's hard because he's our oldest. When I bring up these 'little' concerns to my dh, he's like you. And so what? Everyone is different. But still, I worry. I'm worried about who will want to marry him, will she handle him?! Etc...I guess he's got a lot of growing up to do in all areas but still I can't help but worry. |
There's a bashert for everyone. Maybe he'll be half of a quirky couple that plays with action figures. That's not the end of the world either.
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Giraffe
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Thu, Dec 07 2023, 7:19 pm
Getting to my late 30's and I still play Nintendo games and have so many plush toys. My husband is into Japanese cartoons. Happily married and we just had our 10th anniversary. We have children already.
Yes it is possible to raise a family, be employed and still have hobbies that are associated with children on the side. I am sure most here are familiar with the concept of "Disney adults."
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