If both you and your husband work, what are your hours?

amother

Papayawhip

Thu, Feb 08 2024, 12:03 pm

amother Viola wrote:

I work 9-3 and my husband works 9-430. I do the drop offs and pick ups. BH there are babysitters and playgroups who go until 3.

It’s so crazy that 3 is considered late.

amother

Dahlia

Thu, Feb 08 2024, 12:14 pm

I'm not in Lakewood but my husband does drop offs at 9 and I do pickups at 3:30. I work 7:45-3:15. My husband has flexible hours but tends to work 9:30-6. Someone has to has flexibility in my opinion. My husband is the flexible one. I wish I was but alas.

amother

Papayawhip

Thu, Feb 08 2024, 12:26 pm

amother Dahlia wrote:

I guess this only works since your commute isn’t long it seems. I end work around 2:45 but it will take me about 50 minutes to get home via public transportation.

mha3484

Thu, Feb 08 2024, 12:27 pm

I'm not in Lakewood but the preschool years are hard everywhere. There are very few options that go all day. Its an issue for everyone I think. For 0-2 sharing a nanny with a few families has become more popular. Your baby gets better care and its less pricey. The school I send to is starting a 3 year old program next year with full hours 8:30-2 or 3:45. The 2 year old year is the worst. They cant go to babysitters but finding a playgroup that goes past 1 where I live is a unicorn. You have to do a play group plus afternoon babysitter and tear your hair out or not work full time.

Once they are elementary aged it gets much easier. At this point I have one on the minyan bus and three that I drive on my way to work. Two of those three take the bus home and one I pick up on my lunch break. She can do afternoon bussing next year so no pickups I'yh for anyone. My husband works from home/watches the youngest but he cant always leave at 2pm to do pickup for the 4 year old.

Last edited by mha3484 on Thu, Feb 08 2024, 12:28 pm; edited 1 time in total

amother

Dahlia

Thu, Feb 08 2024, 12:32 pm

amother Papayawhip wrote:

I guess this only works since your commute isn’t long it seems. I end work around 2:45 but it will take me about 50 minutes to get home via public transportation.

My commute is 10 min bh. One of the perks of my job. 50 min is quite a commute. I don't know how you do it.

amother

Powderblue

Thu, Feb 08 2024, 12:36 pm

amother OP wrote:

Thanks! This is helpful.

I do think this is applicable everywhere, but AFAIK Lakewood is unique in the very fixed playgroup hours. Very few allow dropoff prior to 9:15 and few have hours extended past 3ish.

Additionally, my kids are not that old yet, but often girls' bus routes will only pick up at 9:15 as well.

There are plenty of playgroups with longer hours

My kids go to a group with drop off at 9 (though I usually drop off 8:50) and pick up at 3, but the option to go until 4 for an extra fee

amother

Blushpink

Thu, Feb 08 2024, 12:40 pm

Firstly hatzlocha! I remember when my husband first went to work and it was very tough. The transition is not easy but you figure out what works and what doesn't.
My kids' ages range between 4 - 17 so maybe this is why I can't imagine how 2 parents can work full time in Lakewood. In order to manage (without having to beg family and friends to pitch in), one parent has to be flexible.
My husband has his own business but his hours are approximately 8:30 - 5:30 (he is not flexible). My hours are 10:30 - 2:30. I can probably make 10 - 3 work but that is the max. I don't know how anyone else manages (unless you qualify for CHS and can send to a daycare).
I do have friends/neighbors who work longer hours. Guess who gets a phone call to step in and save the day when they simply can't make the hours work?? You guessed it Smile

amother

Maize

Thu, Feb 08 2024, 12:41 pm

Not in Lakewood but whilst my boys are in school until 5 my girls are in school until 245 (one) and 330 (the second)

So:
I do drop off for those that don’t go on a bus, at 9 am. Go to work.
Work from 10-545 and get home at 615.
My husband works from 9-7.

I have a nanny who picks up the girls and the boys come on the bus and she’s there.

amother

Opal

Thu, Feb 08 2024, 12:47 pm

I don’t live in Lakewood but another town in NJ, most of my friends that both spouses work have a lady in the house with the baby and they’ll share those hours with another baby that is dropped off to cover some of the costs. For playgroup ages children they’ll find something that’s walking distance so the lady can drop off and pick up and stay until you get home. Older kids are by bus or arranged carpools
Some people don’t do the share but it can get very expensive

Highstrung

Thu, Feb 08 2024, 12:59 pm

I’m not in Lakewood but when I had kids in playgroup , or even preschool , they would go home with the transportation that I paid extra for to a babysitter for the remaining hours .
Then I found a playgroup on the block of my office that had extended hours until 4 and as soon as I was finished at 4 I would pick up my child from there .

amother

Alyssum

Thu, Feb 08 2024, 1:01 pm

I took a job based on laction proximity to my kid's school the year we didnt have transportation and did the morning carpool. Staying at my job probably till my youngest is 2/3 because it comes with a daycare slot and then I will reevaluate. My husband works nutty hours and the first few months we lived here wasn't home half the week because of his job. He also goes out of town every few weeks so can't fully rely on him.

amother

Emerald

Thu, Feb 08 2024, 1:18 pm

9-130/2 do pickup and drop off sometimes shorter days and work on Sunday remote sessions.

Dh is out early comes back too late to do pick ups

Most moms I know are working part time once Dh starts working (there’s so much taking care of the house that gets done besides drop off and pickup laundry/dinners Dr appointments

amother

Nasturtium

Thu, Feb 08 2024, 1:36 pm

amother OP wrote:

Thank you, this is helpful. If you leave at 7:30 I guess your husband davens vasikin?

He davens at 6:15 and I leave when he gets home (between 7:15 and 7:30).

amother

Thu, Feb 08 2024, 6:59 pm

amother Blushpink wrote:

Thank you for your well wishes Smile

amother

DarkGray

Thu, Feb 08 2024, 7:00 pm

amother OP wrote:

Wish I could qualify for CHS and can't afford to pay private.

I didn’t read rest of replies, so sorry if I’m repeating. I actually work 9:15-2:45 and dh works officially 9-5 I think but he always stays later. I must be at work 9:15 (I wish that always happened lol) and my husband is more flexible. He stays home to take my daughters to the bus, which comes at 9, then he goes to work. I take my younger ones to daycare which does extra hours.
I don’t qualify for chs so I send to a daycare that doesn’t accept chs. Those are way cheaper than the chs ones. I also am crazy nervous about daycares so I did lots of research and found one that I’m so so thrilled at. It’s definitely more $ than a morah in her house, but it’s also for more hours
ETA though, Fridays in this town are crazy!! I work until 1:30 and couldn’t find anyone to go past 12:15, and also my girls in school end 11:30 and boys at 12, so it’s unworkable. I take a break and pick up my younger ones who are close to my work and bring them there, which is so not ideal but work understands. My husband comes home for the school kids and works from home

amother

Canary

Thu, Feb 08 2024, 7:16 pm

amother Blushpink wrote:

Was the job originally 1030-230 or did u cut ur hours? I would want a job with such hours. I imagine it's hard to find. I didn't look that much yet