S\o how do you come up with seminary payment ?

amother

Tiffanyblue

Mon, Mar 04 2024, 7:00 pm

I have an idea. I live in Brooklyn I have a sweet 12 year old special needs girls. I’m looking for someone to take her out Sunday afternoons. I have 15k funding a year for this (I let my workers take many hours as long as I have someone).

From all the thousands of girls in Brooklyn no one is lining up to make some money. No one is even asking.

I’m Not looking to bash girls Bh there are some that volunteer and do great chessed but if there is such a need for seminary funds why don’t we let our kids work a bit for it? The lessons they will learn will make them appreciate their life and opportunity for seminary instead of raising soft entitled kids.

amother

Darkblue

Mon, Mar 04 2024, 7:09 pm

amother Razzmatazz wrote:

That's a very broad statement. I live OOT. We have a small local seminary. Some girls stay, some girls go to EY, and some girls go to NY seminaries.

Edit: I stayed home, got married, and lived happily ever after:)

Is this Toronto? Because it’s not typical for OOT

amother

Hyssop

Mon, Mar 04 2024, 7:11 pm

amother Raspberry wrote:

No of course not!! The reason is that the girls who skip seminary entirely (go straight to work and/ or college) don’t do as well as the girls who get an extra year of kodesh learning, with some supervision. A lot of girls aren’t ready for the “real world” straight out of 12th grade and need a transition year. Depending where you live, there aren’t local seminary options, so it means going out of town or to Israel. (Both very expensive because there is tuition costs + room and board + trips.)

This doesn’t make sense. Depending where you live there are always local seminary options. If you’re in a larger community, there’s a seminary. If not, there’s a seminary in one of the bigger communities in your own country. You don’t need to fly to Israel and seminaries in chul won’t be as expensive as the Israeli ones. There are some small European cities where you’d have to travel to the next country to get to a seminary but it still won’t cost what seminary in Israel will cost. The only exception I can think of might be South Africa. I’m not familiar with the situation there and if anyone wants to clarify that would be nice.

UQT

Mon, Mar 04 2024, 7:12 pm

amother Tiffanyblue wrote:

My daughter worked every Sunday all year for her spending money for seminary. So did many of her friends. They’re Sunday secretary in schools, work in stores etc. they probably come out with $2500 for the year. No one in Lakewood is paying those prices!

amother

Brickred

Mon, Mar 04 2024, 7:28 pm

chestnut wrote:

I hear about this "maturing a lot" all the time. In what ways do girls in Israel mature? By taking buses instead of driving or being driven? By going to the Dr on their own? By living with roommates? Literally all this can be accomplished when staying home. You don't think girls who stay home and work and are in school require much more maturity and self discipline?
And no, there aren't many scholarships at all. In town, there are no HS funds, local federation, or local government funds. Not all seminaries participate in MASA. Not everyone is eligible for FAFSA and I'm not talking about rich families. Seminaries don't give scholarships to everyone.

Basically, once a girl leaves high school she matures. Its just part of normal development as the girl encounters change and other world experiences. If you happen to be in seminary, you will attribute it to seminary. If that same girl stays home and takes a job, she will then attribute her maturity to the job.

Seminaries just hijack normal development and take credit for it. If anything, seminaries delay some level of maturity because it limits exposure to the real world. The more exposure a girl gets, the more she matures. The less she gets, the less opportunity she has to mature. But regardless, there is some level of maturity by simply moving on in life from the sheltered school environment.

You don't need seminary to mature. Simply living life as an adult will do that for you.

amother

Gray

Mon, Mar 04 2024, 7:32 pm

amother Tiffanyblue wrote:

What do you pay per hour. There are many girls who work to make extra money. But here in Lakewood they are getting $20-$25 an hour babysitting or working in stores.

amother

Denim

Mon, Mar 04 2024, 11:04 pm

amother Tiffanyblue wrote:

If I knew about you, my daughter would totally do it! She worked in a Sunday program on Sundays, with a special needs kids, and then in an office, all through high school.

chestnut

Mon, Mar 04 2024, 11:06 pm

amother Brickred wrote:

Right, so girls who stay home mature much quicker as they get much more exposure than those in sems.

amother

Jade

Tue, Mar 05 2024, 12:42 am

amother Razzmatazz wrote:

I specifically said where I am from- chicago. There are no local seminaries here. We have a female only touro , but it’s not seminary, and no one goes there the year after high school.

For better or for worse, here in chicago not a single girl stays home. Being the only one left behind, without a single friend, (especially due to finances), can be very painful.
Not a single girl in my entire grade across all local high schools stayed home that year and didn’t go to Israel.

If you live somewhere else where not everyone goes , and you stayed home and had a great year great. If your community has a seminary, even better. Curious where you live that’s out of town that has a local seminary ?

amother

Ballota

Tue, Mar 05 2024, 1:10 am

I didn't have time to read through the whole thread. Half of my daughters class didn't go to ey sem this yr. In school that usually has 95percent of their girls going. They are in migdal, kerem, asaf and elyon. Or no sem . My daughter is in a Lakewood sem. It's not so much cheaper. It's 17800 for the actual sem. No discounts. 3000 for tti. 40- 50 a week traveling back home for shabbos and yt. There are no buses in Lakewood so to get anywhere you need a car service. But there is hardly any running around to go out with friends...so not much spending money is necessary. If you qualify you can get some FAFSA. And if you live in NJ there's no traveling and you can also get NJ fam ( us new yorkers can't get state federal aid. Would've gotten ny fed aid with the study abroad program if sending to Israel)
But we weren't sending to Israel. And we wanted a dorm so she can become more independent. And she's so happy. They go on trips . Have in shabbosim and shabbosim away. . Night activity once a week. And a birthright trip to Israel that's only costing us 1000. And we're so happy that she's oy a car ride away.

amother

Tue, Mar 05 2024, 7:44 am

amother Ballota wrote:

Curious why the israel ones are 10k more than an American seminary if they have the same expenses..dorm ,food, teachers, trips

amother

Tangerine

Tue, Mar 05 2024, 7:47 am

amother OP wrote:

Curious why the israel ones are 10k more than an American seminary if they have the same expenses..dorm ,food, teachers, trips

Excellent question. And I would assume that teachers in Israel should be making an Israeli salary, which is not equivalent to an American teacher salary.

amother

Silver

Tue, Mar 05 2024, 7:48 am

amother Tiffanyblue wrote:

I don't get what you mean why isn't anyone asking. Have you advertised? Have you gotten the word out that you are looking tom hire?

Are you expecting people to knock on your door and ask about a job that they have no idea even exists???

amother

Brickred

Tue, Mar 05 2024, 8:36 am

chestnut wrote:

Right, so girls who stay home mature much quicker as they get much more exposure than those in sems.

Agree. My previous comment was twofold. First that girls who stay home usually mature quicker. And second, everyone will mature to some degree when they leave school. So if you happen to be in seminary, you may assume that the seminary is what made you mature, when you would have matured just the same (or likely more) if you wouldn't have gone.

Chayalle

Tue, Mar 05 2024, 8:50 am

chestnut wrote:

What?! High school girls? How?

Yeah, I have a niece who worked for an ABA place when she was in 12th grade (she said it was like glorified clubs, half the kids diagnosis is a cover for parents wanting paid babysitting). She got $25 an hour.

amother

Seafoam

Tue, Mar 05 2024, 8:53 am

amother Brickred wrote:

Disagree. When girls (and boys) stay home they are much more immature. Very often the parent takes care of them and does everything for them. They don’t have to go to Israel, but children do need to move out of the parents house and be on their own.

amother

Geranium

Tue, Mar 05 2024, 8:54 am

#BestBubby wrote:

If I had the power I would abolish seminary.

Girls should babysit in 12th grade and work July after graduation to pay for a 4 week tour of EY.

Seminary should be 2 nights a week and help navigate pitfalls of work environment.

Can I like this again?