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Forum
-> Relationships
-> Manners & Etiquette
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amother
Cappuccino
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 Sun, Jun 09 2024, 10:57 pm
| amother Mistyrose wrote: | Great, so majority of BPers are conformists.
It's true! The peer pressure here is through the roof. There's always gonna be the 15 people who say they don't care and end up going their own thing, then there'll be those here on this thread who find it comfortable to deny it because they're afraid of being attacked
Get it through your heads, no one's attacking you or BP. We're just staying the truth, there is loads of peer pressure and there are certain standards that one must keep in order to be with it. And everyone wants to be with it, especially in BP.
Those of us who couldn't do it anymore left. So why are you who are still there so mad at us? | I moved out of bp to a lakewood suburb and the peer pressure is 1000x worse here.
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amother
Celeste
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Sun, Jun 09 2024, 11:22 pm
Omg this thread is ridiculous.
Yes, there are social norms but you don’t need to go crazy. No, you don’t need to buy high end brands. My kids have some matching clothes but don’t usually wear them the same day. In the summer I like to coordinate them on Sundays and Shabbos. During the week, who cares? In the winter I get one coordinated outfit usually for bris/Chanukah party/ family outing… but the rest I don’t do matching. If you have lots of one gender it’s easier to buy them all the same.
Kidichic, tottini, lulu are well priced stores and they sell coordinates.
Basically you want your kids to wear well fitted clothes, should look classy and cute. No dinosaur backpacks or unicorn tops. Skirts should fit well; not shlumpy. Little kids skirts and dresses should be knee length or above. Tights and socks matching is super important. I’m still trying to figure it out. In the winter it’s usually black tights/ socks with dark color shoes. Summer weekday is usually chambray/ light grey/ or white socks. I always ask people in the hosiery stores for their opinion on what to get. I also ask neighbors.
You’ll find snobby people everywhere. I live here all my life and love it. I have ikea paper shades for years and my neighbors don’t seem to have an issue with it 
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flowerpower
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Sun, Jun 09 2024, 11:44 pm
| amother Seafoam wrote: | I love BP!
I'm nice. My neighbors are nice.
One thing though: I wish I can wear sunglasses  |
Why can’t you?!! Of course you can!
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amother
Crystal
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Sun, Jun 09 2024, 11:47 pm
Sure, but not without consequence.
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amother
Violet
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Sun, Jun 09 2024, 11:48 pm
| amother Seafoam wrote: | I love BP!
I'm nice. My neighbors are nice.
One thing though: I wish I can wear sunglasses |
Who doesn’t let?
My ultra frum, chasidish, rebisha friend has glasses that turn tinted in the sun
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amother
NeonOrange
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Mon, Jun 10 2024, 12:02 am
What kind of consequence?
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amother
Crystal
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Mon, Jun 10 2024, 12:03 am
You change how people view you.
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amother
Sienna
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Mon, Jun 10 2024, 12:14 am
I was born in BP and I visit my parents there at least once a month.
I don't know what all of you are talking about.
Boro park is a blast because I love to people watch, and in this place the people watching is fun because everyone is so different and unique!
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happyness
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Mon, Jun 10 2024, 12:14 am
Check in with yourself how you yourself view sunglasses.
Me and my friends all wear them- never knew it’s an issue.
Join the anti-squinting club !
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flowerpower
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Mon, Jun 10 2024, 12:36 am
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No one views you differently for wearing shades!
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amother
Cornsilk
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Mon, Jun 10 2024, 8:15 am
| amother Celeste wrote: | Omg this thread is ridiculous.
Yes, there are social norms but you don’t need to go crazy. No, you don’t need to buy high end brands. My kids have some matching clothes but don’t usually wear them the same day. In the summer I like to coordinate them on Sundays and Shabbos. During the week, who cares? In the winter I get one coordinated outfit usually for bris/Chanukah party/ family outing… but the rest I don’t do matching. If you have lots of one gender it’s easier to buy them all the same.
Kidichic, tottini, lulu are well priced stores and they sell coordinates.
Basically you want your kids to wear well fitted clothes, should look classy and cute. No dinosaur backpacks or unicorn tops. Skirts should fit well; not shlumpy. Little kids skirts and dresses should be knee length or above. Tights and socks matching is super important. I’m still trying to figure it out. In the winter it’s usually black tights/ socks with dark color shoes. Summer weekday is usually chambray/ light grey/ or white socks. I always ask people in the hosiery stores for their opinion on what to get. I also ask neighbors.
You’ll find snobby people everywhere. I live here all my life and love it. I have ikea paper shades for years and my neighbors don’t seem to have an issue with it |
What about boys can they wear white sneakers in the summer or is that strange? 8 year old chassidish boy?
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flowerpower
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Mon, Jun 10 2024, 9:16 am
| amother Cornsilk wrote: | | What about boys can they wear white sneakers in the summer or is that strange? 8 year old chassidish boy? |
Boys that age wear luggage or black color sneakers with a white sole
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amother
Cornsilk
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Mon, Jun 10 2024, 10:15 am
| flowerpower wrote: | | Boys that age wear luggage or black color sneakers with a white sole |
Luggage?
Any links?
We are also moving and like OP I also want to fit in.
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flowerpower
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Mon, Jun 10 2024, 10:25 am
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A lot are wearing sketcher slip on sneakers now in black for 8-9+ boys
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Iymnok
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Mon, Jun 10 2024, 10:28 am
BTW, sunglasses protect your eyes from harmful sunrays that could cause cancer.
Squinting in the sun gives you wrinkles around your eyes.
There are plenty of cute options.
Start a trend!
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amother
Mistyrose
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Mon, Jun 10 2024, 10:28 am
| amother Cappuccino wrote: | | I moved out of bp to a lakewood suburb and the peer pressure is 1000x worse here. |
Why am I not shocked? Lakewood suburbs, especially the ones majority of BPers chose to move to are terrible! it's like another BP, only smaller and like a bungalow colony.
I moved to the 5 Towns. Couldn't be any happier. Life's different here.
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happyness
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Mon, Jun 10 2024, 6:57 pm
| amother Mistyrose wrote: | Why am I not shocked? Lakewood suburbs, especially the ones majority of BPers chose to move to are terrible! it's like another BP, only smaller and like a bungalow colony.
I moved to the 5 Towns. Couldn't be any happier. Life's different here. |
I’m glad you found your place.
If you moved from the 5 towns from BP something tells me that it’s not the just the ‘pressure’ that had you choose to leave.
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happyness
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Mon, Jun 10 2024, 10:30 pm
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Along the vibe of this thread… check out Cypora Perr’s song Give Me Freedom. Great lyrics!
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