cute story or cause for concern?

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Forum -> Parenting our children -> Preschoolers

Cute story or cause for concern?

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amother

Wed, Jul 22 2009, 9:41 am

I have a problem with self esteem, grew up in the shadow of a prettier, skinnier, etc sister. I want to raise my kids to have a good self esteem and was seeing what my 3 year old thought of herself
I told her Mommy and Tatty were proud of her and then asked her why she thought we would be proud of her. She pointed to the baby and said that Mommy Tatty and her were proud of the baby because he can now crawl. ok....interesting.... I asked her again why we were specifically proud of HER and she said because she helps the baby crawl.
I'm trying to figure out if this just a cute story or some kind of sign that everything revovles too much around the baby. wdyt?

jerusalem-girl

Wed, Jul 22 2009, 9:48 am

Why are you proud of her? And why does it have to be something she could talk to you about? There must be a reason for you to be proud?
Do you ever tell her, "Mommy loves you. You're my favorite fill in child's name in the whole entire world. When you were born, Mommy got a new and special place in my heart, just for you....."?
I'm not quite sure why my parents love me, but they never asked me to explain it. I just know that love is unconditional, that regardless of what I do/did with my life, they love/d me, 'just because'.

AlwaysGrateful

Wed, Jul 22 2009, 9:53 am

My take on this? The use of the word "proud." Do you often use "proud" to describe how you feel about your daughter? It could be that she doesn't really know what "proud" mean (even if you've used it occasionally), but that she remembers you used it right when the baby learned to crawl. So when you say "Why is mommy proud..." she automatically thinks "Proud! I know that word! It's about crawling!" And then she got confused when you asked why you'd be proud of HER...so she made up an answer that had to do with crawling.

I wouldn't think it's a cause for concern. Make sure she knows you love her - that's all she needs.

BennysMommy

Wed, Jul 22 2009, 10:30 am

I don't think its a cause for concern. You tell her you're proud of her and she says she's proud of the baby. It's her way of taking care of the little sibling and "mommying" the baby.

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