Declining invitations

seeker

Tue, Jan 19 2010, 4:47 pm

We just moved to a new neighborhood (well, newer to me, DH knows people there) and B"H people seem friendly, we keep getting lots of invitations for Shabbos meals and the like. We don't like to accept for 2 reasons: 1. We hold to very strict kashrus standards and feel uneasy trusting others, 2. DH is a bit of a homebody and enjoys our quiet, peaceful meals much more (I'm also not such a social butterfly, but I could manage to enjoy it if I had to. however, I cannot manage to enjoy it when it means having to put up with DH kvetching the whole way there and back! Rolling Eyes

)

Anyway, we've been able to put off these invitations for a little while already but it's starting to get awkward. Any tips on how to turn down the invitations without being rude or alienating the new neighbors? We can't just say that our policy is not to eat out ever because we do, sometimes -- by certain people (old timer very trusted friends, family). There will have to be a polite refusal going on sometime soon or they will start to catch on that we are simply not interested in them. Sigh.

(WHY do these invitations always seem to take place between the womenfolk?! Wish DH could just turn down his own friends, but it's always their wives calling ME. Sigh.)

levial

Wed, Jan 20 2010, 10:56 am

The rejection should contain a promise of another activity of friendship as raisin points out. In short, not just a "no" but a "no, but why not x"

We're so hard with our kashrut, why not come to us instead? We don't eat out very much and I would love your company.

Why don't we get together at our house during the week.

I know, why not bring your kids by ours for seudah shlisheet playdate and our husbands can walk to shul together.