Please help me criticize nicely!

amother

Wed, Nov 24 2010, 12:11 pm

My children's babysitter is a wonderful woman. She loves my kids and they love her.

Lately I noticed that ds isn't getting cleaned properly after having a dirty diaper (it's obvious that she just gave a quick wipe and that's all) and he's getting a bad diaper rash.

I really don't like to criticize. I have the nicest things to say about her (and say it to her constantly) and I don't want to make her feel that she's not doing a good job.
Should I say something or just accept it as the price I have to pay for not being home with my children all day? If you think I should tell her something, please help me word it nicely so that I shouldn't come across as critical and complaining.

Thanks in advance!

(anon to protect the sitter's privacy)

louche

Wed, Nov 24 2010, 12:38 pm

Of course say something--your child's well-being is the issue here.

"I spoke to the pediatrician b/c dc has a bad rash lately. He told me to be extra careful about cleaning the area after a BM because the least little bit of stool makes it worse. I'm reminding everyone, dh and myself included, to make sure his bottom is completely clean and no residue comes off on the wipe before putting on a new diaper. I'm sure you already do this, but the dr. made me promise to tell everyone! Even my own mother!"

amother

Wed, Nov 24 2010, 12:45 pm

louche wrote:

I'd probably leave that out. If the babysitter has a brain, she'll know you're being patronizing.

louche

Wed, Nov 24 2010, 12:55 pm

Bottom line is there is no "nice" way to say "you're doing something wrong" just as there is no "nice" way to break up with a boyfriend. You can only hope your pleasant manner offsets the unpleasant news.

Sweet Valley Gal

Wed, Nov 24 2010, 12:57 pm

amother wrote:

Of course not. No way. Never. Say it nicely. louche put it down very well.

Good luck!