are you happy with your son's elementary school?

gila-rina

Wed, Jun 01 2011, 10:09 pm

Isramom8 wrote:

Bully about the cost. Any improvements I suggest here in Israel are met with, "Well in America, you'd pay a lot more, and here you don't, so this is as good as you get."

The best cheder was a special ed one in Bnei Brak. My son got horseback riding lessons, planted a garden and brought home its produce, cared for animals, learned math one on one, and kodesh in a small class where the rebbe made sure concepts were actually understood before moving on. If stam good ed like that is called special ed, then all kids deserve it.

so much to say...

amother

Thu, Jun 02 2011, 10:39 am

I'm happy with my sons school

but I am also lucky and realistic.

I'm lucky because my first is a natural student. he loves learning but I think chashivus hatorah and love of learning torah has come from the rebbeim and home.

I'm also realistic because my son will have had 8 rebbeim and at least 15 teachers by the time he finishes elementary school and the school he is in employs at least 60 teachers and 40 aids. I think there are probably 100 AMAZING teachers and 1000 GOOD teachers in each city, and I'd be naive to think that all of them would be working at MY child's school. Most teachers out there are not good. (btw....I'm a teacher)

I'm also not a complainer. If my son has one bad day or one bad run-in with his rebbe or teacher, then thats fine. If you think about it they are "parenting/raising" your kids for more hours than you are.

people will also complain that the boys in my sons school are wild. To that I answer that it's not the schools job to teach your child manner and good behavoir. if your child is wild that's your fault, not the schools.

I also have a parent in an administrative position in an elementary school and you'd be amazed with what he has heard and dealt with. Parents have said stupid things and expect way too much out of the school. Also I find that a lot of parents dont take repsonsibility for their child's actions.

when I was in 4th grade my friend was asked to leave the classroom she refused, after asking nicely a couple of times the teacher went to the student and starting pulling her chair out of the classroom (I dont agree with this but this is what happened). My friend stood up so the teacher couldnt pull her any further. I dont remember the rest of the story in detail but my friend did end up going to the principals office and sitting in there.

now I dont know how her parents reacted but in today's world parents would go to the school kicking and screaming how this teacher is unqualified, embarrassed their child, maybe even cry abuse, etc. Instead of calling up the teacher, apologizing for their child's bad behavoir, and then punishing their child for bad behavoir.

the students bad bad bad behavoir should not be dismissed just because one feels the teacher dealt with the issue incorrectly.

gila-rina

Thu, Jun 02 2011, 10:47 am

amother wrote:

thank you for your reply. What school and what grade is your oldest in?

Barbara

Thu, Jun 02 2011, 11:19 am

amother wrote:

snip
when I was in 4th grade my friend was asked to leave the classroom she refused, after asking nicely a couple of times the teacher went to the student and starting pulling her chair out of the classroom (I dont agree with this but this is what happened). My friend stood up so the teacher couldnt pull her any further. I dont remember the rest of the story in detail but my friend did end up going to the principals office and sitting in there.

now I dont know how her parents reacted but in today's world parents would go to the school kicking and screaming how this teacher is unqualified, embarrassed their child, maybe even cry abuse, etc. Instead of calling up the teacher, apologizing for their child's bad behavoir, and then punishing their child for bad behavoir.

the students bad bad bad behavoir should not be dismissed just because one feels the teacher dealt with the issue incorrectly.

Funny, a similar thing happened when I was in 2nd grade. After the child refused to leave, the teacher said that she could stay for the morning, but would not be permitted to return after lunch. I think it was handled properly. In your case, the teacher (I) put the child at risk of injury; (ii) made it a battle of wills -- which she lost; (iii) created a spectacle. Frankly, I would not want my child in a room with a teacher who has to resort to physical action in order to enforce classroom discipline.

I see a theme, here and in the other thread, that parents should control their children's classroom behavior. We can't. We can talk to our kids. Discipline them at home. But we're not there, controlling the classroom. And in the classroom, its the teacher, not the parent, who must be in control. EVERY year, after the first day of class, this is my conversation:

Hi, Morah, this is Me, DS' mother. DS is in your class this year.
Yes.
DS tells me that he's sitting in the back of the classroom.
DS is very tall.
Yes, he is, but he has an IEP that requires him to sit in the front.
Oh, I haven't had a chance to read his IEP.
I'll be glad to email you a copy. But he needs to be moved to the front.
He told me he likes sitting in the back.
I know that. But he can't hear in the back.
Well, you need to talk to him about that. He's tall, and likes sitting there.
Morah, I have spoken to DS. But he's a child, and has a hard time recognzing his needs. You're the teacher. You need to enforce it.

First teacher conference:

DS was doing so well at the beginning of the year. But lately, he has been zoning out in class, and his grades are falling
Did you rearrange the desks by any chance?
Yes. He said he wanted to sit in the back with this friends.
I can't recall, did we discuss his IEP that requires preferential seating?
Yes. But then you have to tell him to sit in the front.

EVERY year. And we get the same with talking in class (I can discipline him at home, I can talk to him, but YOU'RE IN THE CLASS, not me), etc.