Teach older children to pick up after themselves

imasenior

Sun, May 02 2004, 1:59 am

How do you teach older children to pick up after themselves and keep their room neat? I have been telling them this so many times!

Rochel Leah

Sun, May 02 2004, 2:03 am

My baby isn't old enough yet to know how to clean up yet, though there was once a discipline tip on this site: A mom would pick up all the toys an put it away in a box and if the kids wanted their toys back they would have to pay for them out of their allowance. I don't know what you would do with dirty laundry and other junk left around..

Yael

Mon, May 10 2004, 10:28 pm

the points and stickers charts work well but only while you use them,(short term). what you could do is first of all make sure they know where to put their stuff and that there is a place for everything. also establish as a regular part of the bedtime routine is to pick up all stuff on the floor before heading to bed. also you can take away privileges when their room is not clean to a certain standard.
if this doesn't work on a daily basis, make a rule that at least before shabbos they have to clean up, or else they lose whatever privilege means most to them.
I think that kids have a greater incentive to keep their room neat when you work together to make them a beautiful room, neat, clean, and attractive. then they want to keep it looking nice so they can have friends over and feel proud.
good luck!

proudmom

Thu, Jun 17 2004, 12:09 pm

Well it doesnt work for me. My kids are too lazy to pick up after themselves. We tried so many things but it doesnt help. My husband and I told the older one if you dont pick up the toys we will throw them out and she didnt even care. We took a lot of the toys and threw them out and she even helped us do it. What should I do?

Yael

Mon, Jun 28 2004, 3:32 pm

roni,
you need to get a big cabinet with shelves and 2 doors that you can lock.
put all the toys inside and dont let the kids open it for a week or 2. whatever doesnt fit inside give away. give them just a few toys if they need something to play with. wait for them to forget about the toys in there and one at a time introduce them again. under no circumstances should you ever leave the doors open so they can get to all the toys. let me know how it goes.

proudmom

Mon, Jun 28 2004, 4:46 pm

we put all the toys in the pack and play and we got rid of most of the toys and Esther is learning now to pidk up after herself Boruch Hashem. She is getting more mature now so she understands more, and she is willing to help out more in the house.

imasenior

Wed, Oct 20 2004, 12:42 pm

No, It doesn't sound like fun... May I suggest one change: Please try to PRAISE AND PRAISE AND ONLY PRAISE your oldest daughter for trying to put things in order, I realize that her loud yelling is a sore point for you, but if YOU talk to her in a VERY SOFT VOICE, how wonderful of her to care and clean up, she will learn to speak softer too and the others will see that cleaning up gets only praise!!!!

ForeverYoung
Guest

Tue, Dec 07 2004, 4:48 pm

there are 2 sides to a clean room - it annoys one b/c it's a mess & b/c one, as a parent, had failed to teach her children to clean.

Disengage your self-image from the state of the room.

also, when yo utell your child clean up! they don't know what to do.
Give them spedific instructions. Put toys in place (expklain where the place is).

May be make a deal w/ your child - room is cleaned up on Tue & Fri.

Also, if the child is old enough, don't clean the room for them. Eventually they will realise (Hopefuly) that mess interfeers w/ life.

Hope this helps

Rochel Leah

Tue, Dec 07 2004, 5:35 pm

Great ideas FY!!

With little kids, you could make a game out of it like, go find all the yellow legos and put it in container, and then thenext colour etc...

AweSumThenSum

Wed, Dec 29 2004, 8:52 pm

my children, age 7 1/2 and 10 1/2 are fine with packing away andgoing about their daily routine, BUT ONLY IF I REMIND THEM EVERY STEP OF THE WAY!! it came to the point where I was fed up, and I made them draw up a chart of their activities throughout the day. everything from brushing their teeth in the morning to preparing negel vasser at night - everything went ont hat chart, and they haveto consult the chart periodically throughout the appropriate times in the day. so far, it seems to be working. of course, now it's become a matter of me REMINDING THEM TO PERUSE THE CHART!!! Confused

I guess I'll pick my battles.

mother of 2 princess's

Thu, Jan 13 2005, 5:56 pm

the problem is me and hubby are really messy ppl. I have a cleaner everyday for an hour and she tidyes up for me. but the 2nd my daughter comes home from school and my younger one the house looks like a bombs hit it. im having a unit built so the toys will be in the cubored and ill take what I want them to play with. but my daughter comes in chucks her backs on the floor her coat and shoes in the middle of the hall. the prob is its my fault cos im messy

Tefila

Fri, Jan 14 2005, 11:28 am

Quote:

[BUT ONLY IF I REMIND THEM EVERY STEP OF THE WAY!! it came to the point where I was fed up, and I made them draw up a chart of their activities throughout the day. everything from brushing their teeth in the morning to preparing negel vasser at night - everything went ont hat chart, and they haveto consult the chart periodically

Awesome, Reminds me of Nechama Griesman anthology and I try to do the same but I don't always succeed embarrassed

and

Quote:

the problem is me and hubby are really messy ppl

Manda hon, kids learn what they see not what they preach...... if you want your kid to change well........ Smile

Hatzlacha and now should follow my own advice Rolling Eyes

conc practice what I preach in other areas Very Happy

shayna

Thu, Feb 17 2005, 10:25 pm

well my seven children are as lazy as their momma, but when I need their help I get it with alll the sighs and why can't you ask so and so.
But I have to say My 12, 13 and 14 yr olds do their own laundry which is a big help!

Tefila

Thu, Feb 17 2005, 10:34 pm

Quote:

But I have to say My 12, 13 and 14 yr olds do their own laundry which is a big help!

Shayna wow I'm impressed I still do my kids, teens maybe I will opt to copy. We'll see Smile