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Forum
-> Relationships
-> Manners & Etiquette
amother
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Wed, Feb 08 2012, 11:38 am
At the gan of DD I've noticed that a toddler, (which is in the same class of DD) is wearing for months now very old shoes, without laces and not proper for the winter, this made me very sad. The girl is coming from a big family KA''H and I don't know the financial situation of this family. Yesterday I saw shoes in sale and I was thinking to buy it for her, but I don't know if the mother would appreciate this. I don't know her that much, I just see her at school and we greet each other, she seems very kind. if I would buy the shoes I would put them in a bag and put the bag at school next to her bagpack and jacket. Do you think it's a good idea? would you appreciate this?
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amother
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Wed, Feb 08 2012, 11:52 am
Maybe just tell her dd doesnt like it or doesnt fit & no returns. maybe ur daughter can use it
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Hodu Lashem
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Wed, Feb 08 2012, 11:53 am
I would try to get some info from the Morah first to see if this a good idea or not. Also how would you know the correct size for the child? Just by guessing?
Maybe you could say to the Morah that your cousin just gave you a gift or a friend has almost new shoes that her child never liked or won't wear or some such story. Then ask if anyone could use them. If she doesn't mention this child, then you can suggest, "What about so-and-so? Would her parents appreiate this or would they be offended?" If she does mention this child, ask what size, and then say "I'll check to see what size they are. It's a shame for a perfectly good pair of shoes to go to waste." And then buy the appropriate size and say "Just happens to be the perfect fit!"
Tizki l'mitzvot! It should be a zchus for you and your family!
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smiledr
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Wed, Feb 08 2012, 11:57 am
Oy that makes me so sad. I've actually done that a few times. Some of my patients r poor so once I saw a girl wearing sandals in the winter and I did was the above poster said and it made me very happy to see the little girls wearing her shoes next time. Another time it was a whole family of kids so I contacted an organization gave them money ans they arranged for the family to get shoes. I think if u do it quietly the shoes will b very much appreciated by both mother ans child!
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33055
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Wed, Feb 08 2012, 11:59 am
I do this all the time. I buy something for my daughter with the intention of giving it to a specific girl. I don't lie. I just say that my daughter can't use it.
Not that I think of it, I have two friends who used to give me new stuff for my kids. They probably thought I had horrible taste. They would say they were buying for their kids and bought extra. I never figured it out until now. I think it was sweet.
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amother
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Wed, Feb 08 2012, 12:01 pm
Amother and Hodu lashem that's such a good idea, I am going to speak tomorrow with the morah. I could find out the size, because they wear slippers in class, and the shoes are next to the jackets. And it realy make's me sad to see his shoes
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