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-> Household Management
ABC
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 Thu, Nov 03 2011, 8:59 am
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DH and I both come from very small families. We now have a bunch of kids BH, and are just about coping, but I'd like some tips from ppl who come from larger families about things that might be obvious to them that would help us cope with the demands of a big family (like 4+ kids). Any advice appreciated thanx!
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flowerpower
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Thu, Nov 03 2011, 10:10 am
Get the older kids involved. Let them chip in.
Have a plan for the week like when you do grocery shopping, laundry, cook easy to prepare meals...
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amother
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Thu, Nov 03 2011, 10:18 am
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Establish household chores or routines that even toddlers can follow. For example, all dirty clothing into the hamper, all dishes into the sink, and garbage into the garbage can. Only one messy toy per child out at a time, when the child wants something else the previous toy must be cleaned up and put away first. Simple rules like these can become second nature to children, and will help your household run quite smoothly.
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amother
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Thu, Nov 03 2011, 10:28 am
Hi, I'm bezh expecting my tenth now, oldest is 15 yrs. Here are some tips I can share, most will surprise you.
#1. Tolerance. Some days, or rather many days, are heavily loaded. If you don't take anything going on to heart, you will cope easier.
#2. Flexibility. You planned on a shopping spree but landed at the pediatrician's office because your toddler kept you up all night? Embrace it rather than whine. Kids will be happy with a quick dinner fix and you could even have spent a morning at the ped's office socializing with other moms!
#3. Shortcuts. Learn all there is about quick dinners, non ironing clothes, practical kitchen cabinets and floors, disposable dishes and tablecloths.
#4. Involve the older kids without burdening them. There's a fine line between the two. So be careful to involve them without overloading them so the become resentful. The dentist might be angry with me, but a-jelly-a-day helps put the toys away, guaranteed. And a new pack of Rina and Dina stickers have bathed my kids for an entire week!
#5. Get help. Whether it is cleaning help, a deli supper periodically, a one night vacation, whatever it is that keeps your body fueled. It doesn't make you look incapable. If you don't have the money, borrow. Years down, when you will be able to afford the help, you won't be able to go back and undo the copeless overwhelming days of now.
#6. Make good memories. It is easy to get lost in a large household and be swept away with the times. From time to time, do something "Major", not necessarily costly, so the kids can one day and say what a good time we had once when did xyz or went to abc or had 123.
#7. Remember your master. No, I don't have time for full size tefillos, but in my native tongue, I remember Him and call out to Him. Whatever your request, He is fluent in all languages, so say your tefilla when you cook, bake, fold laundry or mop the floors.
#8. Smile. Your attitude is contagious. Use and abuse humor, even when senseless. When the house is drowning and all seems impossible, a silly joke or comment can put the family in the right mood to perk up and get going.
HATZLACHA!!!! As big as your family will get, remeber, bezh, the nachas multiplies too!!!!
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amother
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Thu, Nov 03 2011, 11:55 am
Amother above thank you.
I am going to print what you wrote and read it everyday.
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gryp
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Thu, Nov 03 2011, 12:14 pm
Get enough sleep so that you can fully function. And don't forget to feed yourself.
I make a dinner menu every Motzai Shabbos for the upcoming week along with a shopping list and to-do list. Every night after I check the list to see what I've accomplished and what needs to get done the next day. My memory is horrible so if I don't remember to write it, I'll probably forget to do it.
Keep your kids clothing organized in their drawers and at a level they can reach. My kids get their clothing most days and dress themselves sometimes before I even wake up. Shoeboxes work great in drawers to hold small things like socks and underwear and accessories.
Avoid clutter by making a set place for everything in your house. Including toys, so kids know where to put what by cleanup time.
Concentrate on making your children feel understood, rather than trying to solve all their problems.
If you come across a product or item that serves your family well, don't buy just one.
Take deep breaths when you feel overwhelmed, and affirm to yourself that everything is and will be just right.
Exercise as often as possible, you'll see it improves your mood.
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amother
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Thu, Nov 03 2011, 12:59 pm
| gryp wrote: | Get enough sleep so that you can fully function. And don't forget to feed yourself.
I make a dinner menu every Motzai Shabbos for the upcoming week along with a shopping list and to-do list. Every night after I check the list to see what I've accomplished and what needs to get done the next day. My memory is horrible so if I don't remember to write it, I'll probably forget to do it.
Keep your kids clothing organized in their drawers and at a level they can reach. My kids get their clothing most days and dress themselves sometimes before I even wake up. Shoeboxes work great in drawers to hold small things like socks and underwear and accessories.
Avoid clutter by making a set place for everything in your house. Including toys, so kids know where to put what by cleanup time.
Concentrate on making your children feel understood, rather than trying to solve all their problems.
If you come across a product or item that serves your family well, don't buy just one.
Take deep breaths when you feel overwhelmed, and affirm to yourself that everything is and will be just right.
Exercise as often as possible, you'll see it improves your mood. |
wow, there is some great advice on this thread! I dont have a really big family (Yet...iy'H I hope to) but I come from a big family, and I remember us kids having a rotation for clearing up supper each night. I also remember trying to get out of it a lot 
We also all shared my parents car once we were old enough, and had a calender up so we could write in when we needed the car. My parents always took precident though over the calender.
My parents instilled in us time-keeping as a value, so I imagine that helped things run smoother.
My mom taught me loads of tricks on quick meals (like boiling water in kettle and pouring in pan for cooking, instead of waiting for cold water to bubble in pan)
Also USE your freezer and make in batches.
I can see with my own kids that letting them 'help' from a young age can really help them establish thing as THEIR job...and it becomes second nature. Like even a 1.5 year old can go and get the bentchers at the end of a meal. A 2 year old can use a wipe to clean the table after a meal. A three year old can get the plastic plates out.
My parents really prioritized according to their values. Certain things did not get done....but I guess something has to give.
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WWG1WGA
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Thu, Nov 03 2011, 1:06 pm
| amother wrote: | Hi, I'm bezh expecting my tenth now, oldest is 15 yrs. Here are some tips I can share, most will surprise you.
#1. Tolerance. Some days, or rather many days, are heavily loaded. If you don't take anything going on to heart, you will cope easier.
#2. Flexibility. You planned on a shopping spree but landed at the pediatrician's office because your toddler kept you up all night? Embrace it rather than whine. Kids will be happy with a quick dinner fix and you could even have spent a morning at the ped's office socializing with other moms!
#3. Shortcuts. Learn all there is about quick dinners, non ironing clothes, practical kitchen cabinets and floors, disposable dishes and tablecloths.
#4. Involve the older kids without burdening them. There's a fine line between the two. So be careful to involve them without overloading them so the become resentful. The dentist might be angry with me, but a-jelly-a-day helps put the toys away, guaranteed. And a new pack of Rina and Dina stickers have bathed my kids for an entire week!
#5. Get help. Whether it is cleaning help, a deli supper periodically, a one night vacation, whatever it is that keeps your body fueled. It doesn't make you look incapable. If you don't have the money, borrow. Years down, when you will be able to afford the help, you won't be able to go back and undo the copeless overwhelming days of now.
#6. Make good memories. It is easy to get lost in a large household and be swept away with the times. From time to time, do something "Major", not necessarily costly, so the kids can one day and say what a good time we had once when did xyz or went to abc or had 123.
#7. Remember your master. No, I don't have time for full size tefillos, but in my native tongue, I remember Him and call out to Him. Whatever your request, He is fluent in all languages, so say your tefilla when you cook, bake, fold laundry or mop the floors.
#8. Smile. Your attitude is contagious. Use and abuse humor, even when senseless. When the house is drowning and all seems impossible, a silly joke or comment can put the family in the right mood to perk up and get going.
HATZLACHA!!!! As big as your family will get, remeber, bezh, the nachas multiplies too!!!! | amother, you sound like a great mom! I was smiling when I read this and happy that there are large families with mommies that can handle them b''h!
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sendamommy
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Thu, Nov 03 2011, 1:28 pm
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I agree cherrrypits. You sound like a terrific mother, amother!
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karen berzon
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Thu, Nov 03 2011, 1:30 pm
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To the amother going on number 10 - Your tips are terrific. It is really nice of you that you took the time out (of your super hectic schedule) to type up that long list. You have your priorities set straight and your kids are very lucky to have you as a mother. You should have much naches from all of them.
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morahtikvah
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Thu, Nov 17 2011, 6:13 pm
| amother wrote: | the two. So be careful to involve them without overloading them so the become resentful. The dentist might be angry with me, but a-jelly-a-day helps put the toys away, guaranteed. And a new pack of Rina and Dina stickers have bathed my kids for an entire week!
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What are Rina and Dina stickers?
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amother
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Thu, Nov 17 2011, 11:20 pm
| morahtikvah wrote: | | amother wrote: | the two. So be careful to involve them without overloading them so the become resentful. The dentist might be angry with me, but a-jelly-a-day helps put the toys away, guaranteed. And a new pack of Rina and Dina stickers have bathed my kids for an entire week!
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What are Rina and Dina stickers? |
Oh, it's the latest girlie fad here in New York. It's a collection of two mitzvah girls, Rina and Dina, and the girls trade them amongst themselves.
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amother
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Tue, Jun 19 2012, 9:28 am
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Rina and Dina stickers are part of a collection of adorable items for girls which are great for incentives. It is available in the tri-state area in most Judaica and toy stores and online at www.rinadina.com. Pinny and Shimmy now joined the Rina and Dina family, check it out. They have great stuff for the summer like coloring books, sticker puzzles, etc, and beautiful puzzles.
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