WHY DO PARENTS DO THIS?

amother

Thu, Dec 06 2012, 7:55 pm

Issue Number 1
I was driving home today and I saw a toddler walking alone. He was less than two years old.
I stopped the car, and looked around. not adult to be seen. I asked him where is your mommy?
of course he looked confused. I rang the bell on a nearby house, but nobody knew where this child belonged to. suddenly I see a woman walking from the corner, she start talking to the boy. she said this is my son, I asked nobody is watching him? she said my husband was supposed to watch him and she walked away.
I am so upset at parents irresponsibility, this is the second time that I encounter a child this age alone !!
what if he cross the street, what if somebody kidnap him?
Please lock the doors, toddlers manage to go out.

number 2

why some williamsburg & boro park ladies leave the children outside in the stroller while going shopping or cofee store?? the take the purse inside WHAT ABOUT YOUR CHILD???? I CANT BELIEVE IT. SO UPSETINGGG!!!

Thu, Dec 06 2012, 8:44 pm

amother wrote:

Why are you picking on wmsbg and bp?

This behavior is considered more normal in some neighborhoods than others. If people have seen this in BP and Williamsburg, it is reasonable to ask if it is commonly considered normal there. It certainly isn't where I live.

I was in a different neighborhood of Brooklyn with a stroller (from OOT, I don't live there) and tried to go shopping. The stores are narrow and cramped, and the shopkeeper did not allow strollers. Some people parked their strollers outside. It seemed to be the way it is there. I'm not comfortable with that and chose to shop elsewhere.

mfb

Thu, Dec 06 2012, 8:48 pm

cm wrote:

amother wrote:

Why are you picking on wmsbg and bp?

I live in these areas and I still dont leave my children outside
if I cant take my stroller in then either I'll hold my child (and my kids are heavy think 20 lbs at 6 months) or I just dont shop in those stores. I dont think its safe anywhere to just leave a small child unattended

IMHopinion

Thu, Dec 06 2012, 8:51 pm

cm wrote:

amother wrote:

Why are you picking on wmsbg and bp?

I shop in those stores. I leave my stroller outside. BUT I TAKE MY BABY INSIDE the store with me. Yes I hold him. No, I don't leave I'm outside if there's some random worker, hired by store,sitting outside "babysitting".
Crazy, but it's not an excuse to put baby into danger.

I think some mothers are relying on Hashem with the wrong stuff.

amother

Thu, Dec 06 2012, 8:54 pm

a couple of yrs ago I was shopping for purim costumes in boro park. it was a tiny store and everyone left their strollers with their kids/babies outside and there was a lady there "watching" the kids. one 2 yr was screaming but of course one lady cant watch 25 kids outside. I was so tempted to take one of the strollers and walk down the block just to prove to these mothers how easy it would be for a stranger chas v'shalom to just take a kid and walk away with him!

zaq

Thu, Dec 06 2012, 10:35 pm

Clearly, the people you describe have tremendous faith in G-d. What they don't understand is that faith does not consist of relinquishing all responsibility for your behavior; it consists of doing your best and then not worrying because the rest is up to G-d.

But as you say, OP, they wouldn't leave their purses lying around outside. Maybe they believe G-d watches over babies but not over purses.

Last amother, I've had exactly the same thought about walking off with a baby, but with my luck I'd be the one arrested.

mfb

Thu, Dec 06 2012, 10:45 pm

zaq wrote:

my husband was going to move a carriage down the block once when we saw one baby in a carriage in front of a wine store that you couldnt see out of the windows so you cant say the mother was watching but then he got worried that he could possibly be arrested for that
he once was near a store where a mother was screaming that she cant find a small child who her approx. 8 year old was supposed to be watching outside after making a whole scene the child was found a few stores down, now the mother yelled at the "older" child for not watching well enough and then walked right back into the store leaving them again outside

rainbow dash

Fri, Dec 07 2012, 2:52 am

amother wrote:

Why are you picking on wmsbg and bp?

Ive lived IN ISRAEL and Europe and it happens there too. I wait till me kids can be watched by someone at home if I needed to go in to a store that doesn't accommodate dubble buggies.

Another thing very common is when you cross the st but before you look to check the on coming traffic the buggy is pushed into the st first. Or my problem here is that there is so much construction on houses that they build a fence projecting into the pavement so I have no choice but to go on the st with 4 kids cause the other side is blocked with garbage or bikes.

Then ive once saw with my own eyes in Israel two men having a conversation in the middle of a busy intersection and big egged buses and cars had to go around them. children see child do.

or how about this one. Ive seen 5 yr olds with a younger kid on the back a bike going to school on a pavement that is very wide but of course hes riding on the edge right next to the street and no helmets.

yo'ma

Fri, Dec 07 2012, 5:37 am

With your first issue, did you read this thread? She was probably really embarrassed and worried about whatever happened that her child was on the streets, she didn't want to get into it with some stranger.

edited to connect to link

Last edited by yo'ma on Fri, Dec 07 2012, 11:16 am; edited 1 time in total

33055

Fri, Dec 07 2012, 6:37 am

I see the three year old picking up the playgroup kid from the bus. I also hate seeing the bus not being met for little three and four year old kids. I got stick behind a bus and about half the kids were not met. I also hate seeing three/four year olds waiting by themselves for the bus on the main road.

I see young kids outside playing by themselves while parents think that by looking out a window periodically is adequate.

The answer to OP's question is that the parents are overwelmed or uneducated as to proper parenting.

ora_43

Fri, Dec 07 2012, 6:40 am

I think it's a bad idea to leave a baby alone outside a store if you can't see them easily from inside, but it's statistically very safe. There's been, what, one stranger kidnapping of a baby outside a store in 30 years?

I tried to check if that's the right number and found this, which I found interesting: http://denmarksimons.blogspot.......html

Anyway. It's not something I'd do but I don't think it's so dangerous that it deserves all the outrage it gets.

I think it's sick to want to take a baby just to scare the mother into mistrusting humanity. If you see an elderly person taking money from an ATM while alone do you feel an urge to grab their purse and run with it for a block or two so that they'll be more careful next time? If you see someone's car unattended to you feel an urge to slash their tires, so they'll realize that any passing stranger could have cut the brake line?

33055

Fri, Dec 07 2012, 6:56 am

ora_43 wrote:

The one kidnapping in 30 years you mention is limited to Denmark.

I don't think certain posters are trying to get the mothers to not trust humanity. They want to shock them into protecting their precious babies. They are not worried about strollers, purses or cars. I hope you can see the difference.

These mothers leaving their children outside also are part of a group that leaves their babies home alone sometimes asking neighbors to listen for them.

Simple1

Fri, Dec 07 2012, 7:49 am

yo'ma wrote:

With your first issue, did you read this thread? She was probably really embarrassed and worried and whatever happened that her child was on the streets, she didn't want to get into it with some stranger.

I couldn't get the link. but I was wondering if OPs first story was some kind of terrible misunderstanding.

Raisin

Fri, Dec 07 2012, 8:59 am

ora_43 wrote:

I'd be more worried about an active baby falling out or getting out of the stroller. Like the mccann family who had their daughter kidnapped while they were eating in a restaurant nearby. I'm sure the risks of having your 4 year old kidnapped are fairly low but the risks of leaving 3 toddlers ALONE in a house must be huge. Who knows what dangerous things they could get up to? Plus imagine how scared they would be if they woke up and found themselves alone.

I think the strollers outside a store thing is found in very overcrowded inner city neighbourhoods. Where I live now I've had exactly one store tell me no strollers allowed. (I walked out) In brooklyn you often have to leave the stroller at the front of the shop or outside. I used to carry a baby carrier with me so I could shop more easily.

yo'ma

Fri, Dec 07 2012, 11:17 am

Simple1 wrote:

yo'ma wrote:

I couldn't get the link. but I was wondering if OPs first story was some kind of terrible misunderstanding.

I fixed it. I did it on an ipad before and I don't know how to do it on there very well.

hello123

Tue, Jan 08 2013, 11:25 am

it doesn't only happen in bp or Williamsburg. I live in a different area where I once saw a father bringing his child to school and I watched as he brought his kid inside the building while his baby was in the car with the car running. I was very tempted to get in the car and drive off. people have to realize that the world is not a safe place to leave children or babies unattended anywhere for any length of time.