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-> Parenting our children
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bamamama
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Tue, Jun 11 2013, 5:48 pm
gp2.0 wrote: | We call it peepee. DD is 3.
OOC, how would knowing the term vulva as opposed to peepee make a difference regarding molestation? |
I don't have time now to look but there are stats which show that it makes a difference. If I remember after the kids are in bed, I'll have a look.
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granolamom
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Tue, Jun 11 2013, 6:25 pm
my 3 yo dd calls it her Giniss. she wanted to know where her p*nis was (she's got brothers) so I said only boys have those, girls have v@ginas. I think she heard 'girls have a giniss', I've stopped trying to correct her.
sorry, but flower makes me laugh. I can just imagine her saying that to her obgyn years down the road :::giggle:::
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amother
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Tue, Jun 11 2013, 11:43 pm
observer wrote: | By the way I see no issue in calling it a "private part" or "private area". Anyone should understand what that's referring to. |
Thank you for answering my question. With ds, I call the general area "private parts", and his eiver/bottom. Would it work for DD to say "bottom" and "privates"?
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bamamama
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Tue, Jun 11 2013, 11:59 pm
amother wrote: | observer wrote: | By the way I see no issue in calling it a "private part" or "private area". Anyone should understand what that's referring to. |
Thank you for answering my question. With ds, I call the general area "private parts", and his eiver/bottom. Would it work for DD to say "bottom" and "privates"? |
Look, lady, it's your house. Call it what you want in whatever language you want. Make up some cutesy name or call it by the name the English language gives it. I just don't get this absolute ridiculousness about avoiding anatomical names.
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chani8
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Wed, Jun 12 2013, 12:09 am
I call it both private parts and vajajay when necessary for clarification. I would usually say, "wash your private parts", but if they say, it hurts down there, I would ask, "your tushy or your vajajay?"
I drive a volvo so I just can't use the term vulva. And I love my red hot volvo.
Even I don't feel the need to know the names of all the parts down there. I have the basic idea, and unless there is a medical reason, I care about those names as much as I do about the names inside the ear for example. Ear and ear drum and ear canal, are good enough for me. Vajajay and tushy get the point across.
edited several times because I didn't know vajajay was usser on imamother and it kept auto correcting
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chani8
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Wed, Jun 12 2013, 12:31 am
amother wrote: | observer wrote: | By the way I see no issue in calling it a "private part" or "private area". Anyone should understand what that's referring to. |
Thank you for answering my question. With ds, I call the general area "private parts", and his eiver/bottom. Would it work for DD to say "bottom" and "privates"? |
Well, that's the problem. Are you going to call her private part 'an eiver'? Certainly not.
My DD refers to it as shetten (for boys and girls) in hebrew, but she also knows the correct english terms. What are the hebrew terms, anyone know?
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Merrymom
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Wed, Jun 12 2013, 6:34 am
Then again, I'm remembering now that although I never had an issue with my girls referring to it in public, my ds did go through a stage where he'd scream loud enough for all the customers to hear, "Ow, my p*nis hurts, my p*nis hurts" every time I put him in the shopping cart.
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tizunabi
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Wed, Jun 12 2013, 7:27 am
chani8 wrote: | amother wrote: | observer wrote: | By the way I see no issue in calling it a "private part" or "private area". Anyone should understand what that's referring to. |
Thank you for answering my question. With ds, I call the general area "private parts", and his eiver/bottom. Would it work for DD to say "bottom" and "privates"? |
Well, that's the problem. Are you going to call her private part 'an eiver'? Certainly not.
My DD refers to it as shetten (for boys and girls) in hebrew, but she also knows the correct english terms. What are the hebrew terms, anyone know? |
Pin and pot (long o sound)
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rosenbal
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Wed, Jun 12 2013, 7:58 am
bamamama wrote: | amother wrote: | sorry I am the amother from above..what's wrong with saying the correct one? for child protection reasons it's advisable that ALL children know the correct terms for genitalia . What is your concern about it? |
^yeah
what gives? I don't know which community you align with, OP, but I gotta say that a little more openness about bodies might go a long way toward protecting kids from predators. Who cares if she sings "vulva, vulva, vulva" at day care? Anyone who gets their panties in a twist about that needs to get a life. |
I care. I don't particularly want my kid coming home from daycare saying vulva or vagin'a. IMHO at age 3 it's a bit much. I'll be annoyed, but other mothers I know will be furious. And I'm not super frummy either. I call them Tushie and Peepee for the little ones. As well as "private parts" since I think private parts is very descriptive in terms of stressing PRIVACY. If a kid tells a policeman, "he touched my private parts" and points to where they were touched, that's fine, the investigators will get it. They're not that thick I think in general that as long as you're open and clear and have discussions with your kids from a very young age about good touch/bad touch and where and who is allowed to touch, that's what counts. Not knowing the exact names. I bet those studies that show that knowing correct body part names correlates with better protection from predators conflate the issues of knowing the names and parents being open about these issues.
Of course when a kid is older, you should give them correct and not baby names. And when my two year old pointed to his nipples and asked what they were, I did say nipples (I mean, what else do I say?! I'm not going to make up a name!) But peepee and tushie are really fine for now for the other parts. I'm just not into little kids going around saying Pen1s or Vag1na. Ugh. I don't think big kids should go around saying them either, but they have more seichel and discretion to know what should be discussed in public amongst friends and what shouldn't.
Ok, now you can all attack me for my prudishness
P.S. My 2 year old nephew has been taught well - he goes around wagging his finger and saying "no rebbe touch peepee!" (he's got a whole list of who shouldn't touch his peepee, but I LOVE the "rebbe" bit!)You're never too young!
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greenfire
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Wed, Jun 12 2013, 8:48 am
you learn something new every day
Quote: | What’s a vulva?
The vulva is the whole female genital "package" — labia, clit0ris, v@gina, and the opening to the urethra. This part of our anatomy gets called lots of funny names — coochie, woo-woo, "down there," and it's sometimes confused with the v@gina — the stretchable passage that connects a woman's outer zex organs with the cervix and uterus. |
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amother
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Wed, Jun 12 2013, 9:13 am
In my family we always called it the "down there". Like "it itches down there" or "I have discharge down there". We all knew the real terms.
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lk1234
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Wed, Jun 12 2013, 9:21 am
For boys it is aiver
For girls it is makom
That is the terms that I use with my children.
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mandr
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Wed, Jun 12 2013, 9:22 am
lk1234 wrote: | For boys it is aiver
For girls it is makom
That is the terms that I use with my children. |
But "makom" is only the vag!na, not the whole vulval area.
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STMommy
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Wed, Jun 12 2013, 10:21 am
rosenbal wrote: |
I think private parts is very descriptive in terms of stressing PRIVACY. If a kid tells a policeman, "he touched my private parts" and points to where they were touched, that's fine, the investigators will get it. They're not that thick I think in general that as long as you're open and clear and have discussions with your kids from a very young age about good touch/bad touch and where and who is allowed to touch, that's what counts. Not knowing the exact names. I bet those studies that show that knowing correct body part names correlates with better protection from predators conflate the issues of knowing the names and parents being open about these issues.
Of course when a kid is older, you should give them correct and not baby names. And when my two year old pointed to his nipples and asked what they were, I did say nipples (I mean, what else do I say?! I'm not going to make up a name!) But peepee and tushie are really fine for now for the other parts. I'm just not into little kids going around saying Pen1s or Vag1na. Ugh. I don't think big kids should go around saying them either, but they have more seichel and discretion to know what should be discussed in public amongst friends and what shouldn't.
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This. Perfectly said. ITA.
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Clarissa
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Wed, Jun 12 2013, 10:36 am
Here's part of the problem. If a kid asks what this or that is, or asks a mother what she has or what the father has and the mother gets obviously uncomfortable or throws out some silly made up word (knowing at some point he or she will know the real words) than the mother is transmitting s*xual discomfort. Body discomfort.
How many threads have we read here about wives saying their husbands NEVER touch them there and seem freaked out about it? Or have never had orgasms? Or feel freaked out if their husbands want something that isn't on the daily menu, s*xually speaking?
I don't care if you want to call a p*nis the Starship Enterprise. It's silly and they'll find out the real word soon enough. But you're putting out there that there's something icky and off-limits and forbidden. You're starting the long road of s*xual guilt and discomfort.
I call a rear end a tushie as opposed to buttocks, because I like the word tushie. But I don't call a p*nis or balls anything but p*nis and balls. Why should I?
My son, when he was younger, saw me naked and asked where my p*nis is, and asked how I urinate. So I explained that, instead of a p*nis I have a v*gina, but I make peepee out of a urethra. Big deal.
I like the way I have to use asterisks here. I'm more open with my kids than I am here.
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chani8
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Wed, Jun 12 2013, 10:37 am
greenfire wrote: | you learn something new every day
Quote: | What’s a vulva?
The vulva is the whole female genital "package" — labia, clit0ris, v@gina, and the opening to the urethra. This part of our anatomy gets called lots of funny names — coochie, woo-woo, "down there," and it's sometimes confused with the v@gina — the stretchable passage that connects a woman's outer zex organs with the cervix and uterus. | |
You're mistaken. It's a "group" not a "package":
Quote: | Volvo Group – a manufacturer of commercial vehicles, etc. owned by Swedish interests. |
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bamamama
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Wed, Jun 12 2013, 11:11 am
Clarissa wrote: | Here's part of the problem. If a kid asks what this or that is, or asks a mother what she has or what the father has and the mother gets obviously uncomfortable or throws out some silly made up word (knowing at some point he or she will know the real words) than the mother is transmitting s*xual discomfort. Body discomfort.
How many threads have we read here about wives saying their husbands NEVER touch them there and seem freaked out about it? Or have never had orgasms? Or feel freaked out if their husbands want something that isn't on the daily menu, s*xually speaking?
I don't care if you want to call a p*nis the Starship Enterprise. It's silly and they'll find out the real word soon enough. But you're putting out there that there's something icky and off-limits and forbidden. You're starting the long road of s*xual guilt and discomfort.
I call a rear end a tushie as opposed to buttocks, because I like the word tushie. But I don't call a p*nis or balls anything but p*nis and balls. Why should I?
My son, when he was younger, saw me naked and asked where my p*nis is, and asked how I urinate. So I explained that, instead of a p*nis I have a v*gina, but I make peepee out of a urethra. Big deal.
I like the way I have to use asterisks here. I'm more open with my kids than I am here. |
Yes. The amount of body discomfort I see around here is astonishing. It has nothing to do with tzniut and everything to do with prudishness and community control.
A p.enis is a p.enis. A vulva is a vulva (VROOM!). Why on earth would you want to teach your child other terms? What is shocking at a 3yo kid knowing to tell the daycare lady that her vulva hurts? I just.don't.get.it. No, I think I do get it. It's about control. Done.
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Isramom8
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Wed, Jun 12 2013, 11:13 am
I use the term genitals, which is actually gender neutral. There are boy genitals and girl genitals. The reason I use this word is random - when my oldest was a toddler I read a suggestion in a book that preschool teachers can tell students to wipe their genitals.
A tushie is a tushie or tush.
I'll bet that Israeli police officers would expect kids to use the term peepee, and that the officers would use that term with kids.
I don't even know what my kids would say in Ivrit. It hasn't seemed to have ever been an issue.
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