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Forum
-> Parenting our children
amother
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Wed, Jun 13 2007, 7:23 pm
oh no...
I used to say that stuff to my mom when I was that age
I didnt' mean it...I just wanted a reaction.
In fact, I wouldn't have bothered saying those things if I didn't know she loved me...it was to wound her because I was angry.
Now I feel about it all, but alot of kids are that way... the mother daughter relationship is tough, so I hear (just have boys for now)
What I might do (or what I wish my mother would have done) is not react during the time of anger.... then discuss the remarks she made when things are calm and tell her that they hurt your feelings. Reassure her. However, you were right to be consistent with the punishment.
Don't worry...she loves you, I am sure, as much as you love her!
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Lechatchila Ariber
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Wed, Jun 13 2007, 7:25 pm
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Mitzvahmom
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Wed, Jun 13 2007, 7:26 pm
That's what I did...once it was quiet...
She's quiet now, and understands that she is in there because of how she was acting.
I always tell her that I love her no matter what.
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Nicole
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Wed, Jun 13 2007, 7:28 pm
Definitely painful to hear. I remember learning in psychology, that once you yourself calm down, the best thing to say to the child is, "well, I love you, no matter what." You did what you had to do. You're disciplining your daughter so that she will grow up, be'h to be a fantastic bas yisrael.
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su7kids
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Wed, Jun 13 2007, 7:52 pm
When my oldest was about that age, mabye closer to 9, he had this rant of "Nobody loves me" and I tried all the kindness and sweetness and it just got worse and worse, until one day I said 'YOU'RE RIGHT'. and that shut him up, as he looked at me, I said, "And my name is "nobody"!"
It became a family standard since then and no-one tried THAT line again! LOL
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mimivan
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Wed, Jun 13 2007, 8:11 pm
su7kids wrote: | When my oldest was about that age, mabye closer to 9, he had this rant of "Nobody loves me" and I tried all the kindness and sweetness and it just got worse and worse, until one day I said 'YOU'RE RIGHT'. and that shut him up, as he looked at me, I said, "And my name is "nobody"!"
It became a family standard since then and no-one tried THAT line again! LOL |
Wow!
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