What is a child molester?

Jewishmofm

Mon, Aug 01 2016, 1:43 am

Child molestation is a crime involving a range of indecent ... activities between an adult and a child, usually under the age of 14. In psychiatric terms, these acts are sometimes known as pedophilia

According to chachmei google.

amother

Honeydew

Mon, Aug 01 2016, 9:04 am

Chani I think that might be simplistic

What about a 13 who acts out with a younger child (say 11?) after being abused?

Or a teen boy who acts out with a sibling or cousin close in age who was interested in age who was interested in say holding hands or kissing but not interested in what transpired?

Or a teen boy who does something s-xual - like touching inappropriately or jerking off to a female sibling who is older then he is? Or younger?

A pedophile is someone who is s-xually attracted to children. A child molester acts out s-xually with a child. But I do believe that all the examples above are not child molesters even though their victims have all experienced molestation.

amother

Honeydew

Mon, Aug 01 2016, 9:05 am

BTW all the above examples have happened to either myself or to people I know.

I also believe that it is possible for someone to be a pedophile ( s-xually attracted to children) with out being a child molester just as it is possible to be gay and celibate and it is possible to be s-xually attracted to a member of the other s-x without raping them.

heidi

Mon, Aug 01 2016, 11:08 am

amother wrote:

All of your examples are molesters.
There might be reasons. And the treatment might vary accordingly. But they are all abusers.

amother

Honeydew

Mon, Aug 01 2016, 11:23 am

So heidi do you believe that all of those cases a should serve in a juvenile detention center?

Should be registered as s-x offenders?

What if you have a 9 year fondle a 6 year old? Is he also a child molester?

I agree that all those examples are examples of molestation. I don't think that all the perpetrators are necessarily child molesters. Professionals in the field probably take different factors into account when evaluating these kind of cases....

amother

Denim

Mon, Aug 01 2016, 11:29 am

amother wrote:

If the victims have experienced molestation, then the perpetrators are child molesters.

chani8

Mon, Aug 01 2016, 11:34 am

I would not call a child or teen, a child molester. They are 'children acting out'.

Also, both children and teens have high treatment success. Therapy often cures them from ever molesting again, according to the experts.

As for a pedophile who doesn't act out, s-x is a verb, it is a choice. S-xual attraction is a also a choice. I can choose to be attracted to someone, or not, by my thoughts and focus. Someone who identifies as a pedophile-who-doesn't-molest isn't a pedophile until he molests.

nywife

Mon, Aug 01 2016, 11:36 am

IMO there has to an element of power & control.
An abused 10 year old who "plays doctor" with his 8 year old sister is in a different category than an adult (or older teen) who knowingly takes s*xual advantage of a child.

debsey

Mon, Aug 01 2016, 11:38 am

chani8 wrote:

A child molester is an adult who does s-xual things to a child.

So a 17 year old who rapes a four year old is not a child molester?

A child molester is someone who uses a power differential (age, power, strength, superior intellect) to exploit a child in a s-xual manner.

chani8

Mon, Aug 01 2016, 11:49 am

debsey wrote:

He is a 17 yo who raped a four year old. Not a child molester.

ora_43

Mon, Aug 01 2016, 12:09 pm

amother wrote:

I agree that all those examples are examples of molestation. I don't think that all the perpetrators are necessarily child molesters. Professionals in the field probably take different factors into account when evaluating these kind of cases....

I think they are mostly examples of s-xual assault of a child, not child molestation. Like the first amother said, "molestation" implies an adult or older teen s-xually exploiting a child. Children can commit s-xual assault or rape of a child, but they can't be child molesters.

All the above is just talking about the technical terminology. Of course there's no difference in trauma to the victim, and sometimes no real difference in the perpetrator's mindset either.

debsey

Mon, Aug 01 2016, 12:37 pm

chani8 wrote:

He is a 17 yo who raped a four year old. Not a child molester.

Legally, he's a child molester, or in the state of NJ, he's a JSO (Juvenile s-xual Offender) I agree that the treatment trajectory for a JSO is different than a 40 year old repeat pedophile. Offending one day before or after the arbitrary date of your 18th birthday isn't really going to make the distinction. But I would definitely look at a 17 year old JSO as a child molester.

chani8

Mon, Aug 01 2016, 12:41 pm

Teens in treatment have a high rehabilitation rate. Labelling them as child molesters probably isn't helpful to their treatment though.

debsey

Mon, Aug 01 2016, 12:52 pm

chani8 wrote:

Teens in treatment have a high rehabilitation rate. Labelling them as child molesters probably isn't helpful to their treatment though.

It is helpful for the safety planning for all other patients in the facility, though!

heidi

Tue, Aug 02 2016, 9:02 am

amother wrote:

OP asked for a definition. I wrote that there are all types of treatment options. I never wrote that I thought they should be punished.
Take a deep breath.