My house only comes alive on Shabbos (mobile devices help)

amother

Tan

Thu, Jan 04 2018, 2:58 pm

I feel sad and a bit of a failure as a mom that it's only 5pm and my house is quiet. My kids are all in their tween/teen years and as soon as they've done what has to be done (homework, eating supper etc) they're on their iPads and iPhones.

I told myself that I will make a rule, no mobile devices until 6 or 7pm but then they say so what are we supposed to do? And I have no answer. It wasn't such a long time ago that the internet was invented....what did we use to do? What should we be doing now? Any ideas?

amother

Jetblack

Thu, Jan 04 2018, 3:01 pm

As op of this thread

http://www.imamother.com/forum.....53856

I get you. But I've given up fighting it, for now.

Following...

amother

Blue

Thu, Jan 04 2018, 3:12 pm

I think there's such a thing that you can block the internet from workinh till a certain time everyday. Maybe ask the phone company about it.

amother

Ivory

Thu, Jan 04 2018, 3:16 pm

amother wrote:

yikes how old are they? I am worried for when my own kids are big. I hope to be strict enough to not allow this. But we’ll wait and see...

OutATowner

Thu, Jan 04 2018, 3:18 pm

Buy board games and have family game night once a week. Don't try to change it all at once.
Have a baking night - "cake wars" style. Or give them choices for ingredients and let them come up with a dish for shabbos. Teams or together.
Paint night- get canvases and do a little every Tuesday. Or you can get very detailed, nice paint by numbers at a craft store. Designate one night a week to do it together.
5000 piece family puzzle.
Idea is to pick something on going, and pick a day to do it.
What do they do on shabbos when they "come alive?"
Hatzlacha!

MiracleMama

Thu, Jan 04 2018, 3:46 pm

5 PM and teens and tween have already finished their homework? Can they help with dinner? Set or clean up table? Help with laundry? Some other helpful household project? Don't they have a book to read? Family game? Family puzzle? Family learning time?

DVOM

Thu, Jan 04 2018, 3:51 pm

OutATowner wrote:

Love your creativity outatowner!

mommy3b2c

Thu, Jan 04 2018, 4:05 pm

Don’t they have homework?

What do you mean by a tween?

My 9 year old still plays on the floor with his mentchies most evenings. Sometimes he reads.

My 11 year old usually draws or reads. Sometimes he plays LEGO.

They also need to do homework and shower. I send them to bed at 9:00 and they read or play in bed till 10:00.

When I was a teen I did homework, read and talked on the phone.

My mom absolutely did NOT let electronics during the week and that was that. I don’t either let. Electronics are for Friday’s and Sunday’s. And even then, only with permission.

amother

Pewter

Thu, Jan 04 2018, 5:03 pm

When I was a teen and tween, when I finished my homework I got on the phone. I don't know if this is the case by your kids, but now, for many, all their friends are online. The girls are on chats or social media and the boys are gaming (often the social ones that are played together or against each other.) So genuinely, that's where their friends are.

It's easier when it's not winter and they can be outside, playing sports or going for walks or watching siblings in the yard. I don't like to fight; I'm more of a "leave interesting things around and people may use them" person. I did get a bunch of puzzles recently, and some of the kids did get interested. As did dh, which was a pleasant surprise. And I made it clear that friends are welcome after school.

gold21

Thu, Jan 04 2018, 5:26 pm

I'm pretty lenient about device use. My kids have other good old-fashioned wholesome interests B"H (they're always up for any sort of interesting activity, especially if it involves socializing or the outdoors-regardless of weather) and, I dunno, I don't really have a problem with device use. I'm using a device right now myself to type on.

unexpected

Thu, Jan 04 2018, 9:10 pm

Some things my boys do:
Keyboard, kugelach, reading, keyboard, uno/spit, mitzvah miles, keyboard
Some things my girls do:
Shmoozing, coloring/drawing, madlibs, puzzles, listening to cds, reading, shmoozing