Emma Watson says she's "self-partnered" not single

singleagain

Wed, Nov 06 2019, 7:08 am

Saw this interesting article. Thought we could discuss. (I'm not as enthused as the author, but I think it's interesting)

Emma Watson Just Coined The Term "Self-Partnered" Rather Than Single https://www.buzzfeed.com/sydro.....Qn9ga

Emma Watson Just Coined The Term "Self-Partnered" Rather Than Single
"If you have not built a home, if you do not have a husband, if you do not have a baby, and you are turning 30, [...] There’s just this incredible amount of anxiety.”

Posted on November 5, 2019, at 1:06 p.m.
Syd Robinson
BuzzFeed Staff

We all know Emma Watson — Actor, activist, and overall badass BINCH!!!!!!!!!

Well, in her recent interview with British Vogue, Watson discussed her role in the upcoming film Little Women, feminism, and the societal pressure around turning 30 — something that's not too far off for the 29-year-old.

"I’m like, ‘Oh my God, I feel so stressed and anxious.' And I realize it’s because there is suddenly this bloody influx of subliminal messaging around," she told British Vogue.

"If you have not built a home, if you do not have a husband, if you do not have a baby, and you are turning 30, and you’re not in some incredibly secure, stable place in your career, or you’re still figuring things out… There’s just this incredible amount of anxiety.”

Then, regarding her relationship status, Watson coined the most incredible, empowering, and perfect term for single folk: SELF-PARTNERED.

“I never believed the whole ‘I’m happy single’ spiel,” she continued. “I was like, ‘This is totally spiel.’ It took me a long time, but I’m very happy [being single]. I call it being self-partnered.”

SELF 👏 PARTNERED!!!!!!!!!!!👏

Immediately, Single Twitter™ took to it and ran:

Hannah Tucker
@h_tucks
All about being 'self partnered', I'm happy and single. Just because I'm nearing 30 does not mean I need to be married with kids. Thanks for coining this phrase Emma Watson ❤️

Hazel Hayes✔
@TheHazelHayes
Replying to @TheHazelHayes
Although maybe it’s because when you tell someone you’re single, the automatic assumption is that you’re actively looking for a partner, so by saying self-partnered you’re making it clear that you’d actually rather be on you’re own right now?

Hot Bot
@LuxeGiorgio
I like this #selfpartnered concept.
It is simpler and more comfortable being on your own, doing your own thing. Happiness is more easily attainable. It all comes back to self-love and being content on your own with yourself, an important place to be at mentally and emotionally.

Helen Lambert
@HRLambert
Can’t wait to throw the I am #SelfPartnered to certain family members and watch them literally choke on air, because I refuse to accept the “you need a rich man with a fast car to look after you” backwards thinking.

UGH. Emma, thank you for being such a force for good and for TEACHING US TO RECLAIM OUR SINGLEDOM!!!!!!!!!!

And happy almost-birthday!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 💖💖💖
P.S. — You can read Emma's full interview in British Vogue out Nov. 8!!!

FranticFrummie

Wed, Nov 06 2019, 7:17 am

I love this so much! Heart

We are valid and whole people, with or without a partner. Having a partner is a choice, and for women, totally optional.

We're all about choice, right?

zaq

Wed, Nov 06 2019, 8:02 am

Meh. Having seen many many changes in terminology over the decades, every time some individual or group gets miffed at the “lingo quo”, I am not impressed. Brava to Ms. Watson for being confident, bold and unapologetic about her domestic status, but do we really need a euphemism for “neither married nor living in sin” err, I mean “in a long-term committed domestic partnership”? Yeesh, it sounds like a legal term invented to replace “sole proprietor” because shoemakers object to the use of the word “sole.”

PinkFridge

Wed, Nov 06 2019, 8:06 am

You know I always say that every single as a right to live a fully engaged life.
What concerns me about the term self-partnered is, how self-focused is her life? Is she still committed to being a giving person?

miami85

Wed, Nov 06 2019, 10:13 am

Its a very not-Jewish hashkafa, we learned in the parsha 2.5 weeks ago how Chava was created from Adam's rib. Ish and Isha are 2 parts of a whole and for most people it is their destiny to search and find that other half. Sometimes its a more complicated puzzle with more than one half and there are probably more cases where the correct piece "gets lost". There could be some individuals that were created "whole" and do not need a life-partner, or it was determined that they do not need to get married to complete their tafkid. Does that mean WE, humans, should treat these people with any less respect? NO. There is ONLY ONE in the universe who knows with certainty who these unique individuals are. Should we "give up on them" no, probably not. Should we berate and belittle their choices? no. Can we daven for them to find their shlaymus in whatever form that may take? Absolutely. I have a friend who's a staunch feminist but she did get married at 30. I spoke to her after she was married for about a year and she said "you know what? I like being married". Being married is not necessarily about "depending on a man", it's about "having someone who cares for you and you care for them" and that union in most cases brings about a next generation of little people to care for and you care about them. I got married as an "older single" and there were many things/chores that I did on my own before I was married--I put together furniture on my own, I lugged my suitcases up and down escalators. But now, I let my husband do those things because he enjoys the building and is just naturally stronger than me.

singleagain

Wed, Nov 06 2019, 10:18 am

miami85 wrote:

I don't think it's about celebrating singledom. It's about but identifying a person as single and therefore less

gingertop

Wed, Nov 06 2019, 10:30 am

PinkFridge wrote:

I'm not a big Emma Watson fan, but yes, she does a lot of advocacy for issues that are important to her.

I actually think her interview was not at all as obnoxious as the headline writers made it sound. She was asked if she's feeling fulfilled being single, she answered that she's doing great, she's self-partnered. She was answering a question about her personal life, not on an agenda to promote singlehood.

PinkFridge

Wed, Nov 06 2019, 10:45 am

gingertop wrote:

Good to hear. I don't know who Emma Watson is.

amother

Pink

Wed, Nov 06 2019, 10:48 am

PinkFridge wrote:

Good to hear. I don't know who Emma Watson is.

I don't know who she is now... but come on! She was Hermione in the Harry Potter movies!

PinkFridge

Wed, Nov 06 2019, 10:55 am

amother [ Pink ] wrote:

I don't know who she is now... but come on! She was Hermione in the Harry Potter movies!

I should have googled. I vaguely remembered hearing of her as an actress but that's about it.

Ema of 5

Wed, Nov 06 2019, 10:58 am

amother [ Pink ] wrote:

I don't know who she is now... but come on! She was Hermione in the Harry Potter movies!

She was also belle in the new beauty and the beast. (I only know this from Spotify- her name comes up with the song “good morning) or bonjour” or whatever it’s called.)

DrMom

Wed, Nov 06 2019, 11:02 am

Is this different from "single by choice?"

More of a "I'm single now, and I'm perfectly okay with that?"

ora_43

Wed, Nov 06 2019, 11:51 am

Like the general concept, hate the term.

It sounds like taking self-love to the kind of extreme usually reserved for Greek tragedies.

amother

Lilac

Wed, Nov 06 2019, 11:53 am

I think the sentiment is fine, but the phrase is pretentious/silly.

icedcoffee

Wed, Nov 06 2019, 11:55 am

Sounds like she's just pointing out that being single is often treated as something sad or shameful or like something is missing in your life, when in reality, a person can be very happy and fulfilled by herself. I don't think she's trying to make it catch on as a new dictionary term or anything.

Tangential note, the thread makes me think of the Zex and the City episode where Carrie goes to a friend's baby shower only to get her Manolo Blahnik shoes stolen when she leaves them at the door. She laments that she's constantly buying gifts for her friends' engagements, weddings, and babies, but a single woman gets bupkis. Her friend refuses to pay for them because "I shouldn't have to fund your extravagant lifestyle." So later she calls the friend and says "I'm getting married. To myself. And I'm registered at Manolo Blahnik." The friend relents and buys the shoes and Carrie ends the episode saying "one giant step for me, one small step for single womankind... The fact is, sometimes it's hard to walk in a single woman's shoes. That's why we need really special ones now and then. To make the walk a little more fun." (I'm not commenting on the silliness of the episode but rather that the concept has been around at least since Carrie Bradshaw!)

amother

Slateblue

Wed, Nov 06 2019, 11:55 am

I think people are over thinking this. It was just something to say in an interview that probably was probing a little too deeply into her personal life that she didn't want to share with a million fans.

ora_43

Wed, Nov 06 2019, 12:05 pm

gingertop wrote:

I actually think her interview was not at all as obnoxious as the headline writers made it sound. She was asked if she's feeling fulfilled being single, she answered that she's doing great, she's self-partnered. She was answering a question about her personal life, not on an agenda to promote singlehood.

For sure. This is a writer who needed to come up with a post that would get views, and went with the classic

celebrity + 2-4 random people agreeing = new trend!

I don't think Emma Watson is trying to make any big statement beyond, Emma Watson is OK with the fact that she's 29 and not married. Which - good for her.

miami85

Wed, Nov 06 2019, 12:30 pm

singleagain wrote:

I don't think it's about celebrating singledom. It's about but identifying a person as single and therefore less

It may not have come across in my post but I'm not opposed to the notion of feeling secure as a single person, but the idea of "Being married to myself" or "self-partnered" sounds a bit like "I've stopped trying" which for most people isn't the right hashkafa.

amother

Coral

Wed, Nov 06 2019, 12:34 pm

It kind of reminds me of Gwyneth Paltrow calling her divorce a "conscious uncoupling". It does sound silly, but I get what she's trying to say. Celebrity women who are not married or don't have children are constantly being asked these kinds of questions in interviews (nobody ever asks the men) and the world is expecting them to be sad about it. Clearly she's fine with it, and more than that, sees her life as much more than her relationship status. Good for her. The frum community could stand to take a lesson in how to treat older singles.

urban gypsy

Wed, Nov 06 2019, 2:30 pm

Truly ridiculous. "Partnered" means "in a relationship"
Does she mean that she is in a relationship with herself?
That implies a certain level of commitment
If she decides to date someone, will she be cheating on herself?
If she has no intention of having any romantic relationships ever, why not just call herself aromantic or asexual
If none of these, why not just say, "happily single" like a normal human
Ugh I hate silly stuff like that