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Forum
-> Chinuch, Education & Schooling
amother
OP
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Wed, Nov 13 2019, 9:24 pm
Teen DS came home from school today pretty grossed out. He said one of the rabbeim in school used the bathroom (while DS was in there, which I think if I saw a student using the bathroom I would turn around and go back in when the student was not their or use the teacher's bathroom) and did not wash his hands before he left.
I am really grossed out too. I want to send an email to the Menahele saying he needs to have a talk with the teachers/rabbeim about the importance of hand washing- really- sad in this day and age that it even needs to be discussed.
My question- Am I wrong to say something( not outing the person) to the menahel, the Rosh yeshiva, the english prinicpal. Thoughts???
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amother
Floralwhite
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Wed, Nov 13 2019, 9:25 pm
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amother
Bisque
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Wed, Nov 13 2019, 9:26 pm
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tigerwife
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Wed, Nov 13 2019, 9:28 pm
Some people don’t wash their hands in the bathroom. Maybe he went to another sink.
Or, he may have used the stall for changing or adjusting part of his clothing.
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amother
Sapphire
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Wed, Nov 13 2019, 9:29 pm
Maybe he doesn't wash his hands in the bathroom. But he washes his hands in the school kitchen. I used to do that when I worked in a school... Washed netillat and made Asher yatzar by the clean kitchen sink. It was only a few steps away.
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amother
Cerise
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Wed, Nov 13 2019, 9:30 pm
Maybe he washed his hands in another sink?
Some ppl don’t like to wash in the bathroom.
Hard to imagine he didn’t wash at all. A rebbi? He didn’t bentch Asher yatzar?
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amother
OP
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Wed, Nov 13 2019, 9:32 pm
tigerwife wrote: | Some people don’t wash their hands in the bathroom. Maybe he went to another sink.
Or, he may have used the stall for changing or adjusting part of his clothing. |
He used the urinal and left..
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amother
OP
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Wed, Nov 13 2019, 9:34 pm
amother [ Cerise ] wrote: | Maybe he washed his hands in another sink?
Some ppl don’t like to wash in the bathroom.
Hard to imagine he didn’t wash at all. A rebbi? He didn’t bentch Asher yatzar? |
No other place to go to wash your hands with soap, but in the school bathroom. DS would know as he has some mild OCD when it comes to hand washing and bathroom use. I am sure DS used a paper towel to open the door after that.
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amother
OP
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Wed, Nov 13 2019, 9:35 pm
amother [ Floralwhite ] wrote: | I wouldn't say. |
I am curious as to why you would not.
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amother
Lilac
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Wed, Nov 13 2019, 9:35 pm
It's really weird that a rebbe would use a urinal in front of the kids. Are you sure you have the complete story? Does he seem otherwise "normal"?
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amother
OP
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Wed, Nov 13 2019, 9:36 pm
I wish there was a school nurse that I could speak to,but there is not...
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amother
Wine
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Wed, Nov 13 2019, 9:36 pm
He probably didn’t go to the bathroom
Maybe just needed a tissue or wanted to fix his belt or something..
That’s what I would have told my son.
Really not appropriate to talk about another adult like this.
Most frum people I know, especially if someone is in chinuch, are careful to say Asher yatzar after using the bathroom. This brocha cannot be said if one didn’t wash his hands.
Rest assured that if he needed to wash then I’m sure he did.
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amother
OP
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Wed, Nov 13 2019, 9:37 pm
amother [ Lilac ] wrote: | It's really weird that a rebbe would use a urinal in front of the kids. Are you sure you have the complete story? Does he seem otherwise "normal"? |
Yeh that is total creepy, but that did not seem to bother my 13year old as much as the hand washing-did not want to creep him out more by bringing that up. Guess the man really had to go...
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amother
OP
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Wed, Nov 13 2019, 9:39 pm
amother [ Wine ] wrote: | He probably didn’t go to the bathroom
Maybe just needed a tissue or wanted to fix his belt or something..
That’s what I would have told my son.
Really not appropriate to talk about another adult like this.
Most frum people I know, especially if someone is in chinuch, are careful to say Asher yatzar after using the bathroom. This brocha cannot be said if one didn’t wash his hands.
Rest assured that if he needed to wash then I’m sure he did. |
How do you do that at a urinal- wouldn't you go into a stall?
Why is not appropriate for DS to discuss basic hygiene concerns with his mother?
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amother
Fuchsia
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Wed, Nov 13 2019, 9:39 pm
amother [ Lilac ] wrote: | It's really weird that a rebbe would use a urinal in front of the kids. Are you sure you have the complete story? Does he seem otherwise "normal"? |
Don't know about younger grades, but in many mesivtas or older rabbeim use the urinals.
I know, I still can't wrap my mind around it but apparently it's ttly normal.
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amother
Wine
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Wed, Nov 13 2019, 9:41 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote: | No other place to go to wash your hands with soap, but in the school bathroom. DS would know as he has some mild OCD when it comes to hand washing and bathroom use. I am sure DS used a paper towel to open the door after that. |
You don’t know about other places
He could have washed in the teachers room, kitchen...
You only know about places for the kids to wash
The issue here isn’t about washing hands
The greater issue is you are accusing him of not saying Asher yatzar. I’m sure a Rebbi would not do that.
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amother
OP
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Wed, Nov 13 2019, 9:41 pm
amother [ Fuchsia ] wrote: | Don't know about younger grades, but in many mesivtas or older rabbeim use the urinals.
I know, I still can't wrap my mind around it but apparently it's ttly normal. |
If DS sees a rebbi in the bathroom he waits until they leave before going in... this was the other way around.
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amother
Lilac
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Wed, Nov 13 2019, 9:41 pm
I don't even mean weird as creepy, I mean socially off. Because if that's not the case I think there must be more to the story.
Isn't there a halacha that a student is not supposed to see his rebbe naked? If it was such an emergency I'd think he'd use a stall not a urinal.
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amother
Wine
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Wed, Nov 13 2019, 9:43 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote: | How do you do that at a urinal- wouldn't you go into a stall?
Why is not appropriate for DS to discuss basic hygiene concerns with his mother? |
You are only to blame with his ocd of hand washing
You tell him that Of COURSE rebbi washed his hands! He just went to a teachers sink outside of the bathroom!
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amother
OP
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Wed, Nov 13 2019, 9:45 pm
amother [ Wine ] wrote: | You don’t know about other places
He could have washed in the teachers room, kitchen...
You only know about places for the kids to wash
The issue here isn’t about washing hands
The greater issue is you are accusing him of not saying Asher yatzar. I’m sure a Rebbi would not do that. |
The school is tiny- there is only two places with soap- the kitchen which is not near the bathroom and that is pretty gross to walk all the way to kitchen where food is prepared to wash your bathroom hands when there is a sink and soap right there. There is a washing cup by the water fountain right next to the bathroom, but no soap there. Not accusing the rebbi of not saying asher yatzer... ds did not follow him out- just want to know if this should be a discussion with the adults in the school building about basic 21st century hygiene.
I am guessing your answer is no.
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