Would you let this age kids walk home themselves?

amother

Aquamarine

Wed, Jul 01 2020, 7:39 am

SixOfWands wrote:

Dissenting vote. No way. They are not old enough to be taking care of themselves, which is what you're asking them to do, albeit for a short period of time. They are not old enough to have the impulse control not to run into the street if they drop something, and not old enough to cross safely. They are not old enough to reliably resist strangers who ask to help look for a lost puppy, or other such stuff.

The fact that you live in a "frum" neighborhood is irrelevant. There are plenty of "frum" criminals. And, in any case, the real risk is their actions, not anyone else's.

Doesn't seem like you read the original post right. She said no crossing. She said they're being dropped off by corner and lives exactly 4 houses into the street. Later she added they're responsible kids. You have to show your kids you trust them, one day or the other.
A mother knows her kids the best

SixOfWands

Wed, Jul 01 2020, 7:42 am

amother [ Aquamarine ] wrote:

I read perfectly well. In your desire to attack me anonymously, however, you don't. I pointed out that kids may drop things that fall into the street.

Trust must be shown at an age-appropriate level. This is not age appropriate.

#BestBubby

Wed, Jul 01 2020, 7:46 am

In the book Ramona the Pest, 5 year old Ramona and Howie ask their parents to walk to school together, without mothers, walking several blocks and crossing one street alone. The mothers agreed. The children were careful. The school did not call CPS.

This was considered normal in the 1970s. And it is a myth that there was less crime than.
It was about the same.

amother

Powderblue

Wed, Jul 01 2020, 7:50 am

SixOfWands wrote:

It is very age appropriate to allow a 6&7 year old to walk themselves 4 houses. If mom's nervous she can stand by the door and look out for them. It's just 4 houses, not 4 blocks.

#BestBubby

Wed, Jul 01 2020, 7:50 am

This is from a 1979 First Grade Readiness checklist:

“Can he travel alone in the neighborhood (four to eight blocks) to store, school, playground, or to a friend’s home?” https://slate.com/human-intere......html

Did you read the d!ck and Jane books? those kids went around the neighborhood themselves, including going to stores.

Did you read Dennis the Menace? Dennis played outside unsupervised.

Did you read The Snowy Day? Peter played outside in the snow unsupervised.

Last edited by #BestBubby on Wed, Jul 01 2020, 7:51 am; edited 1 time in total

amother

Scarlet

Wed, Jul 01 2020, 7:51 am

If you have a smartphone, you can buy a tracking device (like a relay) that can stay in one of your kids knapsacks and then you can easily track the bus route home on the app.
This way if you choose to continue waiting for the bus, you won’t have to wait long in the sun. You’ll just go out whenever you see the bus is close to your corner.
And if you decide to let them walk home, you can see exactly where they are and not be nervous if one day the bus is late.

amother

Purple

Wed, Jul 01 2020, 7:53 am

amother [ Scarlet ] wrote:

That is actually a great idea except if the kids lose their backpacks or leave it in school or on the bus so it can backfire as well.

amother

Brunette

Wed, Jul 01 2020, 7:54 am

OP, been there done that. I was very nervous that my child should come off the bus by himself. I too live down the block from the corner. I gave him the rundown: when you get off the bus, come straight home and let me know you arrived. Especially if your friends are outside I will get worried if you stay out and play.
The next day I stood outside in front hidden away to see how he would come off and he passed the test!

Once you see for yourself that he can do it you'll feel calmer.
Make it clear he must come straight home and not stop for anyone or anything

amother

Aquamarine

Wed, Jul 01 2020, 7:58 am

SixOfWands wrote:

My intention was totally not to attack. Sorry you feel attacked.
The way you wrote seemed like you thought they're walking home alone the whole way. Just wanted to point out, that a mother knows when she can start trusting her kid more than just right out of the house.
Regarding dropping stuff, sadly happens plenty times even mom is waiting. Things might even be worse then cuz mom in all hysteria starts yelling which scares off child, making him run back and forth.

If you think, your kids at that age were/are too little and irresponsible to do such, okay. But it's not a general fact. IMO

Ora in town

Wed, Jul 01 2020, 3:32 pm

I think they are big enough to do 400m on their own, especially if they don't have to cross a street...

children have to learn to discover the world and to conquer their independency...

I think in the US, in this regard, the general culture is quite "helicopter"

In Europe, there are generally no school buses and children are expected to walk to school on their own from first grade (not right at the beginning of the school year, but after 1, max 2 months...) Teachers even intervene and tell "helicopter moms" to let them do it. Obviously not if the school is far away...
Latest in 3rd grade, children are expected to go to school on their own, even if it is further away, by public transport...

Here I found a clip about Japan, but in Europe, it's similar... although not that extreme. as I said...

Last edited by Ora in town on Wed, Jul 01 2020, 3:44 pm; edited 2 times in total

naturalmom5

Wed, Jul 01 2020, 3:35 pm

#BestBubby wrote:

I dont think OP lives in Mayberry RFD

RuralIma

Wed, Jul 01 2020, 3:48 pm

SixOfWands wrote:

I disagree, children can be taught these things. It depends on the kids, there aren't any hard and fast rules when it comes to what age is capable of what since every child develops at such different rates. Our 6 - almost 7 - year old plays outside by himself and we're both comfortable with it. He does have a Relay so if we need to reach him or vice versa it's easy but he has also proven to us that he can be responsible.

He knows that safe adults don't ask kids for help. We have actually seen him in situations where he has said no to things. Someone once asked him if he wanted toy cars, his absolute favorite thing, and he said no (we were with him at the time but this person was a complete stranger to all of us.) And another time someone in a car asked him to help them look for their dog, he said, "sorry, I can't do that." And came inside to tell us (we already knew it happened as we were watching). He knows how to cross a street after he looks out for cars, he knows that if something drops or goes into the street not to go after it but to come and get us so we can keep an eye out for cars while he retrieves it.

Some children are not ready for those things and others are. There are some kids I have known that I wouldn't trust to check the mail. I think OP knows her children well enough to assess whether or not they have the maturity and responsibility to be able to walk down the street.

monkeymamma

Wed, Jul 01 2020, 3:52 pm

Ora in town wrote:

Did you watch the video? The mom is saying that she would never let her kid go to school alone in America so not sure why you would show this to an American parent worried about her kids walking down the block by themselves.

amother

Bisque

Wed, Jul 01 2020, 4:04 pm

Mama Bear wrote:

You can also request that the driver wait the 2 minutes from when they get off the bus until theyre at your driveway before he leaves, just to make sure they went straight home. Many drivers will do that.

That is not fair to ask of the driver and that imposes on the other children/families.
Imagine if 15 families do that. If one can, so can the others. Now think about the poor kid at the last stop.